Discrimination against older women

We have to move with the times however old we get, we need to be prepared to learn new things ask for help and be open

Many older people are so closed and afraid of any changes I worry about new stuff as much as the next person but after you ve done it a few times it becomes familiar

Doodlebug my GP uses that system too and it so easy you can even send a photograph if it’s an external problem I don’t use the doctor much thankfully but when I have, I have had some medication to pick up at local pharmacies a few hours after the email has gone through
You HAVE to move with the times however old you are

My 2nd cousin is learning Spanish online, she will be 100 after Christmas

Bill Gates (Microsoft) is 70 this year. The late Steve Jobs (Apple) would also have been 70 this year. Hardly spring chickens.

Alan Sugar introduced the Amstrad home computer around 1984 following hard on the footsteps of the Commodore - around 1982.

iPhones have been round since 2007 and the Blackberry was introduced in the late 90's.

That's 40 years + since affordable home computers came onto the market and 20 years + since the introduction of smart phones or at least phones that had internet capabilities.

That's ample time for people to learn how to use them.

It's one think to be discriminated againt because you can't do something - another thing entirely because you won't.

*thing - not think!

Doodledog

Allira

Good heavens!

Please could your surgery have a chat with our Practice Manager?

I know! It’s so much better than the last system where you had to ring at 8, along with a million others, and when told there were no appointments do it all again the next day. 8.00 is when a lot of people are on the way to work, and don’t want to discuss their haemorrhoids in front of everyone on the bus or train.

This is so much better, but people still complain that they are being ‘forced’ to use the Internet.

I think another local surgery is using that system but a friend said she tried and tried to get an appointment, the internet slot was open for half an hour from 8.00am to 8.30 and the 'queue' was so long she failed to get an appointment.
After a week she decided to seek a private appointment to try to get a scan.

Ours is open when the surgery is open. They triage morning and afternoon, so if your request goes in later it will be the next day before you get a call. They say they will respond within 48 hours (it is not for emergencies) but on the rare times I've used it I got a call straight away.

I have to phone in the morning; really I just need a phone consultation. It should be interesting to see if I can get past the receptionist. 🤔

Doodledog

Ours is open when the surgery is open. They triage morning and afternoon, so if your request goes in later it will be the next day before you get a call. They say they will respond within 48 hours (it is not for emergencies) but on the rare times I've used it I got a call straight away.

Our online e consult is available during surgery hours, it’s very efficient. Sent one at at about 10am last Tuesday, triaged by 11 and txt sent with the means to book a convenient physio, which I’ve done for tomorrow.
But, I’ve two friends who are scared to use it/don’t know how and won’t be shown, so the surgery accommodates them, they’ll never learn.

I think we need to sepeate poblems caused by disability anf difficulties caused by age.

Anyne who is deaf, whether 9 or 90 will have problems with phone calls, but can, of course, use text.

Sometime ago I described the problems I have with mobile phones because I have dyspraxia and ADHD. Anothe GN member posted that her 14 year old GC, with the same problems had the same difficulties using a phone.

Of course older people are more likely to have a disability than someone younger, but the problem is the same regardless of age.

Apologies for wandering off piste!

Exactly my point.*M0nica*. As long as it is written off as an 'old person' thing, people will try to accommodate rather than educate, and real discrimination will get worse, as the idea of all older people being refuseniks who aren't prepared to try anything new will be further cemented.

One thing I really wish would happen is for all NHS staff, in whatever role they occupy, to be trained not to use words like 'bless' and 'sweetheart' to older people. I had bloods taken on Friday and the HCA kept having to try again and 'blessed' me every time. I didn't need or want her blessing - I wanted it to stop! I have a massive bruise, which is going to get worse before it gets better. 'Sorry Mrs Dog' would have been so much better than 'oh, bless you sweetheart'😡

My hairdresser blesses me all the time and calls me 'darling'
I have a name, dear, please use it and then I'll call you by yours!

Even a young GP said "Ah, bless" when I was telling her about my symptoms.

The vicar can bless me if he likes 🙂

I bank online, order goods online, participate in online discussions, have consulted my GP surgery online but it isn't all manna from heaven. Too often online interaction is limited by drop down boxes that don't cover what I want to address. When it's Amazon I know how to get past the Bot and text with a real person, but a recent parking app site totally defeated me. There was no way to email, no telephone number to ring to speak to a real person, so the two identical charges for the one car parked in the one place for the same duration just had to be swallowed. Not the end of the world but frustrating and annoying, and wrong!
I do agree Doodledog about 'bless' and 'sweetheart' type comments. I'm happy for them to use my first name, especially when they introduce themselves in that way, but I don't want to be spoken to in a syrupy sweet 'little old lady' fashion. All except for one smashing HCA who calls everyone from the doctors to the postman and all in between 'my lovely'

Allira

Good heavens!

Please could your surgery have a chat with our Practice Manager?

We have a very similar system at our surgery. It's called Accurx. It is amazing.

Ladyleftfieldlover

Thank you AuntieE. I am 72 and don’t feel at all left out by the way life is changing in all sorts of ways. As you point out, things change! Where on earth would we be if they didn’t?

Just saying - in my WI there are 50 ladies ranging from 40s to 99. There is just one lady - in her 70s - who flatly refuses to engage with technology. The 99 year old is perfectly competent with IT and happily sends out emails.

So it could be attitude not age.

I have a friend (84) who will not have anything to do with technology. Not short of braincells (she was a teacher), she just won’t change her mind. She used to make little digs at me because I love my iPad and laptop.
The funny thing is, she frequently asks me to look things up for her!

I dislike 'bless' but I have noticed that those who use it are quite indiscriminate in how they use it and seem to use it to everyone from dustbin men, to solicitors, to women of all ages. It is not just used when speaking to the elderly.

I'm 87 and have been on my own for 16 years now. It's quite hard in some ways but I believe in trying to keep up with modern changes. I do have a smart phone and a pc. My sons help me a lot, I wouldn't be so up to date without them to guide me. I do love my smart phone and do lots on it, but think it's a pity that so very much of life is now conducted on there.
My real bugbear is the doctor's surgery. The only way now to get their attention is online. For the first time in my life I don't have a regular doctor, one who really knows me, and I think that is all wrong. And it is so hard to get an appointment.
I had to push and push to get referred in order to find out what was causing my severe back pain.
But do I feel discriminated against? I certainly feel invisible at times. People often seem to ignore me or be unable to see me, I feel.
I quite like being called names like 'my lovely', in fact, to be honest, it brings tears to my eyes sometimes if people are actually nice to me.

I would love to know how my smartphone works but I have nobody to teach me. Not having any family. I am more tech-savvy than my friends, as I order online and do online banking. I am partially sighted due to Macular and deaf because of a benign brain tumour, but I do try.

I have googled locally for classes but no joy.

I forgot to mention I will be 82 shortly.

Charleygirl5
Are you able to use the smartsmartphone at all?
I've only had a basic one for a year and have gradually ventured into previously unknown areas eg YouTube.
If you can find Google or similar could you ask it
Get started on my phone.
There is usually a way of speaking rather than typing queries which might be easier for you.
Once you've found how to do that. Sometimes you can tap the empty search box twice to get the microphone.
Sorry I'm not much help.

I not sure if it's judt older women who are recipients of discrimination but old people in general as far as some medical professionals are concerned. Not all, I would hasten to add, but there are definitely a good few.

Charleygirl - I can't understand how people can carry out their lives on smart phones; banking, working, social lives, navigation etc. I'm sure we could as we are obviously fairly tech savvy, but I prefer to use something larger and use the phone as a phone, for messages, calls, WhatsApp etc.
It's just too small.

I agree with the posters who say a lot of this comes down to attitude. I worked in a GP surgery and obviously a significant number of patients were elderly and couldn’t use technology and they were always dealt with in an understanding way.
As for ethnic minority women, so much has to do with their culture. They are in fact being discriminated against because of patriarchy in their own societies which sadly doesn’t seem to change much now that they’re living in a fairer society.
We all need to embrace change. My 90 something mother had no issue tapping her card at the checkout - it’s much simpler than fumbling with cash.

Ah, now - paying with a credit card! Sometimes you have to present the Wifi logo on the front, sometimes on the top, but we've just come across one where you have to rest the black strip on the screen for a couple of seconds.

Some banks (particularly overseas) require you to enter the card then swallow it up.

The thing is.... some of us who are now, like myself, in our 80's were using the early computers and word processes at work. I had an early, basic mobile phone and progressed to a Smart phone.
I agree, it's more about attitude than age.
There are of course exceptions. Not everyone is able to understand systems for reasons of health or technical ability.

....word processers!!

Aldom

The thing is.... some of us who are now, like myself, in our 80's were using the early computers and word processes at work. I had an early, basic mobile phone and progressed to a Smart phone.
I agree, it's more about attitude than age.
There are of course exceptions. Not everyone is able to understand systems for reasons of health or technical ability.

I think it's the squinting at a small device that is annoying for me. I much prefer to use a tablet or even the PC when on the internet eg researching genealogy, grocery orders etc, and the phone for other things.