Discrimination against older women

4allweknow

AuntieE My husband was deaf, had a cochlear implant eventually. Our GP always addresses the floor when speaking so fir my DH impossible to try and make sense if what was being said. On one occasion my husband used an App that recorded and translated speech, approved by GP. On showing the GP what tge App had interpreted his speech to be he was astounded, complete garbage. From then on I had to accompany my DH on any visit. Not enough staff to sit in and attempt to decipher what was being said. All very well if you have someone to go with you. The GP was English born and bred. Tgere are situations when the world just does not accommodate everyone.

I can really understand this. I actually had an ENT consultant who was looking at and speaking to his comp

The constant blaming of all the current societies ills on us. The statement that life is so much harder now!

Us older folks save for what we wanted struggled with 17.5% mortgage rates, did not demand fitted carpets, new cars, money to feed/look after our own children, modern tech. but now we are to blame.

I have a friend ,he's 73, refused to change his phone for an up to date one. An old Nokia he could only use for calls. I lent him and old smart phone for a few months and now he's got a Samsung with all the bells and whistles.
He still doesn't like online banking tho. And I do understand some of the trust issues with that, especially with so.much fraud and scams going around.

I hate being called “ dear”.

Jess20

I think we're not listened to when we use health services, 10 months to diagnose a tendon rupture which, due to my age I assume, several practitioners, including GP and physiotherapist, had decided was only osteoarthritis. My own understanding of my body was ignored and it was assumed I had a common condition that affected older people and can be treated with sympathy and paracetamol, despite the fact that I was hopping around on crutches and saying it was an injury. I am not alone amongst my circle of friends in having been fobbed off, one even had a heart problem which needed surgery but was told it was imaginary! Access to investigations seems to be harder for older women in particular. I have started to be very vocal about it when I think it's discriminatory.

A friend with a poorly husband said last week she felt ignored by hospital medical staff when trying to explain what had happened.

AuntieE My husband was deaf, had a cochlear implant eventually. Our GP always addresses the floor when speaking so fir my DH impossible to try and make sense if what was being said. On one occasion my husband used an App that recorded and translated speech, approved by GP. On showing the GP what tge App had interpreted his speech to be he was astounded, complete garbage. From then on I had to accompany my DH on any visit. Not enough staff to sit in and attempt to decipher what was being said. All very well if you have someone to go with you. The GP was English born and bred. Tgere are situations when the world just does not accommodate everyone.

I use my apple wallet on my iphone to pay for everything in shops it means that when i leave the house all I carry are my keys and my phone! I order deliveroo and Amazon from my phone watch iplayer and listen to pod casts. I use my lap top for work. IT has been a huge part of my life for about 3 decades as it has been needed at work and now increasingly at home. The discrimination I see is the patronising comments that I think inflict themselves on women in general and especially older women. The cloak of invisibility as someone else said is bloody annoying

Charleygirl5

I would love to know how my smartphone works but I have nobody to teach me. Not having any family. I am more tech-savvy than my friends, as I order online and do online banking. I am partially sighted due to Macular and deaf because of a benign brain tumour, but I do try.

I have googled locally for classes but no joy.

Charleygirl5, have you tried your local library (or libraries if you're lucky)? I volunteer in one and they run sessions for people who need help navigating smart phones, ipods, laptops etc. Maybe check out that route? Hope you get sorted soon.

Yes, I agree.
It’s attitude, not age that holds folk back.

I’m eighty, and have adapted to using an iPad and online banking. Ordering goods online etc.

I have several friends of Same age who just can’t be bothered to learn and flatly refuse to learn.

Of course, it drives me nuts sometimes as I don’t fully understand IT . But I refuse to be left behind.

Charleygirl5

I would love to know how my smartphone works but I have nobody to teach me. Not having any family. I am more tech-savvy than my friends, as I order online and do online banking. I am partially sighted due to Macular and deaf because of a benign brain tumour, but I do try.

I have googled locally for classes but no joy.

I tried with a smartphone and had to give up...as I couldnt figure out anything on it.

I'm just trying again - with one called "Chattie" - as they say it's very simple and it's marketed for the "elderly". I am not best charmed at buying an "elderly" phone - but thought I'll give it a try. They say it comes already set-up.....but I have a back-up plan in mind of going into the local phone shop and offering to pay them to make sure it is sorted and I know how to use it if it comes to it.

I think it pretty much only does what I want it for - and not a load of unnecessary "bells and whistles" too. It's the "bells and whistles" that got me when I tried it before - and I binned it and thought "Well - if 'They' can't be arsed to do a simple one = then blow them and They will have to accept me doing things my way".

Charleygirl5

I would love to know how my smartphone works but I have nobody to teach me. Not having any family. I am more tech-savvy than my friends, as I order online and do online banking. I am partially sighted due to Macular and deaf because of a benign brain tumour, but I do try.

I have googled locally for classes but no joy.

Speak to Age UK, they have volunteers who can help you on a one to ne basis. A friend of mine used them when she had problems with her computer and found them so helpful.

It really isn't just women, but anyone older who struggles with doing things online or with technology. My mother is no longer alive but I remember how she struggled even with using ATMs. Fortunately the staff in the bank knew her and rescued her card from the machine when she invariably forgot her pin.
I've done online banking for a while but my husband only started last year, when they closed the last of three banks that were reasonably close to us. The nearest is 45 minutes away by bus and involves long queuing for the limited tills. He really doesn't like using mobile banking, though he knows it is essential now. There are several older people locally who can only manage their banking because they have younger relatives who help them.
Much the same applies to online grocery shopping, which is something that becomes more necessary as you get older.
Some services from our excellent GP can only be obtained online now, not by phone, and the main NHS site has a pretty convoluted logging in system. Without going through to the site you can't read letters and reminders about hospital appointments in our area.

I think we're not listened to when we use health services, 10 months to diagnose a tendon rupture which, due to my age I assume, several practitioners, including GP and physiotherapist, had decided was only osteoarthritis. My own understanding of my body was ignored and it was assumed I had a common condition that affected older people and can be treated with sympathy and paracetamol, despite the fact that I was hopping around on crutches and saying it was an injury. I am not alone amongst my circle of friends in having been fobbed off, one even had a heart problem which needed surgery but was told it was imaginary! Access to investigations seems to be harder for older women in particular. I have started to be very vocal about it when I think it's discriminatory.

I use my PC for most things, and also my smartphone, although I do not as yet, trust it to pay with.
I think though that for many older women, who may be just on the basic pension, the costs of having an internet connection at home may be prohibitive. I have a partner and we share these costs, but if I were alone, with my tiny pension I think I would find it hard to find the money. I probably would though, as I love it for it's convenience and family hisory is my main hobby.

Aldom

The thing is.... some of us who are now, like myself, in our 80's were using the early computers and word processes at work. I had an early, basic mobile phone and progressed to a Smart phone.
I agree, it's more about attitude than age.
There are of course exceptions. Not everyone is able to understand systems for reasons of health or technical ability.

I think it's the squinting at a small device that is annoying for me. I much prefer to use a tablet or even the PC when on the internet eg researching genealogy, grocery orders etc, and the phone for other things.

....word processers!!

The thing is.... some of us who are now, like myself, in our 80's were using the early computers and word processes at work. I had an early, basic mobile phone and progressed to a Smart phone.
I agree, it's more about attitude than age.
There are of course exceptions. Not everyone is able to understand systems for reasons of health or technical ability.

Ah, now - paying with a credit card! Sometimes you have to present the Wifi logo on the front, sometimes on the top, but we've just come across one where you have to rest the black strip on the screen for a couple of seconds.

Some banks (particularly overseas) require you to enter the card then swallow it up.

I agree with the posters who say a lot of this comes down to attitude. I worked in a GP surgery and obviously a significant number of patients were elderly and couldn’t use technology and they were always dealt with in an understanding way.
As for ethnic minority women, so much has to do with their culture. They are in fact being discriminated against because of patriarchy in their own societies which sadly doesn’t seem to change much now that they’re living in a fairer society.
We all need to embrace change. My 90 something mother had no issue tapping her card at the checkout - it’s much simpler than fumbling with cash.

I not sure if it's judt older women who are recipients of discrimination but old people in general as far as some medical professionals are concerned. Not all, I would hasten to add, but there are definitely a good few.

Charleygirl - I can't understand how people can carry out their lives on smart phones; banking, working, social lives, navigation etc. I'm sure we could as we are obviously fairly tech savvy, but I prefer to use something larger and use the phone as a phone, for messages, calls, WhatsApp etc.
It's just too small.

Charleygirl5
Are you able to use the smartsmartphone at all?
I've only had a basic one for a year and have gradually ventured into previously unknown areas eg YouTube.
If you can find Google or similar could you ask it
Get started on my phone.
There is usually a way of speaking rather than typing queries which might be easier for you.
Once you've found how to do that. Sometimes you can tap the empty search box twice to get the microphone.
Sorry I'm not much help.

I forgot to mention I will be 82 shortly.

I would love to know how my smartphone works but I have nobody to teach me. Not having any family. I am more tech-savvy than my friends, as I order online and do online banking. I am partially sighted due to Macular and deaf because of a benign brain tumour, but I do try.

I have googled locally for classes but no joy.

I'm 87 and have been on my own for 16 years now. It's quite hard in some ways but I believe in trying to keep up with modern changes. I do have a smart phone and a pc. My sons help me a lot, I wouldn't be so up to date without them to guide me. I do love my smart phone and do lots on it, but think it's a pity that so very much of life is now conducted on there.
My real bugbear is the doctor's surgery. The only way now to get their attention is online. For the first time in my life I don't have a regular doctor, one who really knows me, and I think that is all wrong. And it is so hard to get an appointment.
I had to push and push to get referred in order to find out what was causing my severe back pain.
But do I feel discriminated against? I certainly feel invisible at times. People often seem to ignore me or be unable to see me, I feel.
I quite like being called names like 'my lovely', in fact, to be honest, it brings tears to my eyes sometimes if people are actually nice to me.

I dislike 'bless' but I have noticed that those who use it are quite indiscriminate in how they use it and seem to use it to everyone from dustbin men, to solicitors, to women of all ages. It is not just used when speaking to the elderly.