You need to ask your baby’s permission before changing his or her nappy….

I used to say to my babies….”come on, let’s get this stinky nappy changed and put on a nice clean one” but asking permission to do so?????? ………what a load of absolute twaddle!

She might just be encouraging those parents who don’t talk to their children, to do so from early on, in all situations not just nappy changing.
Possibly most of us did, without the distraction of mobile phones. Maybe most parents do now.
Maybe, in our increasingly nanny-state, some parents didn’t know you should do that, without being told that they should.

Is it possible that the rising number of children starting school in nappies is because they’ve been allowed to say no to potty training either at home or at nursery?

So a baby thrashing around and resisting a nappy change is saying "Don't dare touch me, I want to stay in this wet, dirty, stinking nappy all day and get horrible sores on my bottom!".

Has this woman got any children?

I absolutely understand the need to teach children about safeguarding but that is just quite ridiculous.

It was a great incentive when lifting the lid from the nappy bucket first thing in the morning, to crack on with toilet training.
Where is all this going to end? Do they seriously expect a Mum to leave her baby in a stinking nappy for hours on end? Crazy.

Magenta8

When I studied child development it seems there is little point in toilet training much below the age of two as the brain connection to the detrusor and sphincter muscles is not sufficiently developed to enable control.

The pathway in my brain must have been well developed 😁

nanna8

Well it worked for me is all I can say. They were all aged 1 - 1.5 years and they all wanted to be toilet trained all by themselves. Mind you, the bulky cloth nappies that we had to wash probably helped. I also fostered little ones and they were the same. No effort on my part, they just wanted to. Australia has better weather, perhaps that was a factor.

My mother said I was clean and dry day and night by 15 months - perhaps having no washing machine helped!

My own were ready later but, surprisingly, DS was the earliest.

Well it worked for me is all I can say. They were all aged 1 - 1.5 years and they all wanted to be toilet trained all by themselves. Mind you, the bulky cloth nappies that we had to wash probably helped. I also fostered little ones and they were the same. No effort on my part, they just wanted to. Australia has better weather, perhaps that was a factor.

When I studied child development it seems there is little point in toilet training much below the age of two as the brain connection to the detrusor and sphincter muscles is not sufficiently developed to enable control.

nanna8

If they got their children toilet trained by the age of one, as we used to do, there would be no need to ask. These ‘babies’ running round with nappies at age 3 are quite disgusting.

By age one? I didn’t. I waited until they were just 2, having read that they were much better prepared, physiologically speaking, by that age, in that they could recognise the need to ‘go’ and make it to the potty/loo in time.

It took just a week both times.
This was in the late 70s/early 80s.

If they got their children toilet trained by the age of one, as we used to do, there would be no need to ask. These ‘babies’ running round with nappies at age 3 are quite disgusting.

When she’d only recently started walking, so around 13/14 months, more than once Gdd2 would go to the ‘nappy cupboard’, take one out and bring it to me.
A clear enough request!

A far greater danger seems to be that wehavemade children and teenagers too comfortable with their bodies so that they are happy totake photographs ofall or parts of their bodies and send them to other people,includig people they have only mer online. They are then beenthreatened by people that if they do not continue down the exposing oftheir bodies or paying their blackmailers, thepictues will be sent to theirfamily and friends and/or published online. They are told that their 'lives will be ruined'.

Absolute insanity.
Whatever next ?

Absolutely Caleo 👍🏻

Dear Poppyred, Poppycock!!!

Oh yes, the hands down in the 💩

Always keep a small toy handy as a distraction while you ask permission to clean a bottom - and check to see if you have permission to change every item of clothing too 😁

Oreo

I think most Mums talk soothingly to their babies when changing their nappies, to distract them from wriggling about.
Changing baby DGS nappy was a two man operation!😁

True. Sometimes it was soothing chat, sometimes it was of the Why do you have to do this the minute we’re going out?

My children would have regarded the pause Deanne mentions, as a chance to roll, to reach down and get 💩 on their hands or to cry because they objected to the warm, smelly nappy being removed and the cold air hitting the nether regions.
Should I then have wrapped them up and left them in their mess? Of course not.
This coming up again now is another implication that parents cannot parent without the help of Sure Start or similar.

Deanne Carson seems to be CEO and only member of Body Safety Australia.

Deanne Carson does not even understand the old now disliked term 'intersex' which has nothing to do with being transgender, but means somebody with a DSD (difference of sexual development)

I find her pronouncement on 'transgender children' horrifying

Deanne Carson says:

I have taught a ten year old who, in discussing sex and gender and the glorious variations of human experience, realised they were intersex.

Under new recommendations in the UK, these children and the many children like them would be denied the information and support that we provide.

But in the UK quality relationships and sexuality education is being gutted because we allowed those intent on dismantling it to whip up a moral panic about transgender children.

When we allow a 'debate' on the existence and dignity of trans people, we participate in the erosion of all the recommendation from the Royal Commission to Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse. Because once they have erased trans identities from the classroom then they target gays and then abortion, contraception, pleasure and consent. This is exactly what has played out in the UK

This "discussion" is yet another example of people sounding off without trying to understand.

I don't know why people are so keen to rubbish things without knowing anything about them.

Speaking to Australia’s ABC News on 8 May, Deanne Carson said she works with parents from birth teaching them "to set up a culture of consent in the home" and to talk to their newborn baby saying things like "I’m going to change your nappy now, is that OK?"

“Of course a baby’s not going to respond and say, ‘Yes, mum, that’s awesome, I’d love to have my nappy changed!’ but if you leave a space, and wait for body language, and wait to make eye contact, then you’re letting that child know that their response matters,” says Deanne.

Since giving that interview, Deanne has found her views ridiculed online.

Deanne tells BBC Three that her words have been misunderstood.

She says parents should communicate with babies while changing their nappies, so that – even though they can’t respond with words - they learn from an early age that they are in control of their bodies.

Deanne Carson appeared on ABC Australia
“We read to small children with no expectation that they will pick up a book and read it back to us or even really understand what the book is about,” Deanne explains. “What we are doing there is building the foundations of literacy and normalising reading. So when we practise consent with babies, we are doing exactly the same.”

Deanne, who works with the child protection organisation Body Safety Australia, explains that parents already talk to their babies about what they like and don’t like.

"We often speak to them, wait a beat or two, and then respond for them – most people do it, and it’s how babies learn language and empathy,” she says. “For example, we’ll say, ‘Would you like some banana? I have a lovely banana just for you! You would, you would like a banana?’"

Deanne says that parents already talk to their babies while feeding them
Deanne adds that approaching babies in this way means that they're more likely to have healthy relationships with people when they grow up.

“If children grow up in a home where their bodies and voices are respected, then that’s the core value they will bring into their future relationships."

Let's not rubbish all new ideas before we've found out what they are.

Labradora

BlueBelle

Oh darling baby may I have permission to tell you not to put your finger in that hole in the wall
Nooooo
Oh dear I was needing you to say yes it’s very dangerous
Noooooo
Whoosh, bang, whallop, sizzle oh dear

Quite.............

Unlike the press and some GNs, I don't believe the principle was meant to be applied to all areas of parental control.

BlueBelle

Oh darling baby may I have permission to tell you not to put your finger in that hole in the wall
Nooooo
Oh dear I was needing you to say yes it’s very dangerous
Noooooo
Whoosh, bang, whallop, sizzle oh dear

Quite.............

Rosie51

Mt61

Mt61

WE. they do belong to the parents, until they are at an age to make their own minds up.

I say they belong to the parents but agree with Caleo, that some parents need to learn how to parent.
Local authority is getting a large house ready near me, for exactly this purpose.

I'm totally in favour of parents being supported and helped in their parenting, but I hope they aren't 'taught' that there is only one acceptable way to parent.

Magenta8 I did quote Deanne Carson in my earlier post at 01.02.50 where she mentions body language and eye contact.

Each parent /child relationship is unique. However it's a wise parent who knows the best research on how young children learn.

Apologies Rosie51