This year I am going to a friends for christmas, but have usually spent christmas day on my own since my husband died. As I am a singer have on most years been extremely busy with several concerts , all of which also mean extra rehearsals too, and in fact one year - never to be repeated - I was asked to help out at more concerts and ended up the week before christmas where I was rehearsing monday, tuesday, wednesday, and singing in the actual concerts thursday friday saturday!! I was also singing in different locations with differing costumes so somewhat paranoid about forgetting things I had all three sets of music and the clothes in the car with me all the time!! Resolved never to commit to so much again in one week, although I do love all the christmas music and occasions , Oh and I also go round and sing with carol singers for various charities. When my son was young we did all the traditional stuff here and enjoyed it, but when it was my husband and myself, our choice at christmas was to treat ourselves to a decent piece of sirloin and do a grand roast beef with yorkshire puddings and all the trimmings. We have never been a great fan of turkey and this was much more of a treat to us. Then we were popular when we visited people who would say rather hopefully " would you like a turkey sandwich?" or whatever and would be pleased when we were happy to have it. Then we also used to do quite well in the time between christmas and new year. There were hotels and restaurants which were doing both christmas and new year deals , who needed to keep their staff for the whole period, and used to offer lovely lunches at a reasonable price in the interim period, and we used to smartly book for one of those which was a treat.
As my family live at the other side of the country and the weather can be quite bad, we usually just ring each other etc and then meet up or I go over there sometime in January. I am quite happy with this arrangement and as a singer and a lover of opera etc., can enjoy organising my meals so that I can watch the opera and the ballet and anything else I want to enjoy on the tv and radio. Of course there will be some great Bach to enjoy and many other music I enjoy and I will be able to hear it all and in peace and quiet. I think that it is an attitude of mind too. I chose to think I am lucky to be able to enjoy my music uninterrupted rather than feeling that I am on my own and have no one here. I always think of my lovely husband but of course especially at such times, and there are one or two traditions that I shall probably try to keep. We used to love two or three films that to us, were christmas specials to enjoy. So I shall be looking out to see if Celia Johnson and Trevor Howard are still at the station, and that Humphrey Bogart is either in Casablanca or up the river with Katherine Hepburn and of course The Railway children , the original one with Jenny Agutter as Bobby will be films to enjoy with memories of my husband and a decent drink and some nuts to enjoy with them. Well I shall hope to enjoy some or all of the things, if my back allows me to, and have to admit, there are times when I hear the tales of woe and quarrels etc that have happened at some peoples christmas that I am quite glad that I havent had to put up with that. Peace in my own company is preferrable to hassle with a lot of other people. I do also think that the tv and social media who of course want you to spend the earth on their goods, make it seem as though the only kind of christmas is spending a fortune and showing great tables with families all enjoying it all, which can make viewers think that everyone else but them is enjoying themselves. Just call in at a cafe the week before christmas, or talk to frazzled friends who are trying to organise get togethers where x wont speak to y and a must not sit next to q and have vegetarians, meat eaters, and pescatarians all at the same meal. Ah been there done that, had my share of getting through such occasions and am happy to be able to choose what I want to do, and of course at least , whilst I wont be going mad , I will have sufficient to eat and drink and be in the warm, without getting a bank statement in the red in the new year!!
