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Talking to strangers

(109 Posts)
Biscuitmuncher Sat 27-Dec-25 21:27:53

I went shopping with my daughter's today. We took our little dog and I was sat outside the shop with her. I was sat next to a lady and we started chatting, and I was struck by how people tell you the most personal things when they don't know you. Has anyone else found this too

sue421 Thu 01-Jan-26 15:46:08

Yes I do come across this, my issues are probably more than theirs, however, they just probably want to chat. Can't we just afford them some time to chat. No criticising, no judgement. We can't change the world but we can listen

JudyBloom Wed 31-Dec-25 12:54:08

Yes I have found that strangers will strike up a conversation and almost tell me their life history. I think sometimes some people just want to be listened to.

sodapop Wed 31-Dec-25 12:42:49

For many years I worked with people who had a learning disability, just about every time I was out and about someone with learning disability would come and chat to me. Even away from home on holiday it happened, my family thought I had some sort of welcome aura.

Shel1951 Wed 31-Dec-25 12:36:37

Yes happens again lot.
My husband said once that if I stood next to a lamp post there would be a conversation

JackyB Wed 31-Dec-25 12:33:11

Maremia

On buses, yes, also trains, but never planes. Wonder why not?
More stress, being on a plane?

@#££"

I have spent whole flights chatting to the person next to me. Actually one was quite annoying as I hadn't had much sleep an was hoping for some shuteye. Once I was talking to someone who had just opened a guest house in the black forest. He told me the name but I stupidly forgot it. Shame, it would have been ideal for a weekend away.

Another time I sat next to a lady who was flying to England to interview Ken Follett for a magazine. I didn't know who Ken Follett was! (But I have enjoyed his books since.)

Can't remember any interesting conversations on trains or buses.

Jules59 Wed 31-Dec-25 11:07:50

Oh my goodness, how dreadfully sad Primrose52 ….☹️🥰

Maggiemaybe Tue 30-Dec-25 22:28:09

I always acknowledge the person behind the counter when I go into a small shop. I thought most people did? Then a quick thank you when I leave. Same when getting on and off a bus. I must say I’ve rarely come across anyone putting their head down and avoiding eye contact in this country.

CariadAgain Tue 30-Dec-25 17:26:53

Boadicea

When we lived in rural France it was normal to say "bonjour" to everyone in general when going into a shop or bakery - if you didn't they would pointedly say it to you. The same when passing a stranger in the street.
Moving back to England I would do the same at first but often got funny looks or people would just put their heads down and avoid eye contact. Very sad.
I often end up in conversation with strangers and "oversharing". It's common with ADHD!

When I went on holiday to visit an Italian friend of mine I was informed by her that shopkeepers would be expecting me to greet them when I walked into their shop. I'm not sure how often I remembered - but I tried to make sure I did....

Tenko Tue 30-Dec-25 17:15:46

I’m on the London /Surrey borders and people rarely chat to strangers , especially on trains or buses . I’ve always had dogs and dog owners are very friendly and say hello or good morning and often chat about our dogs .

Boadicea Tue 30-Dec-25 17:02:12

When we lived in rural France it was normal to say "bonjour" to everyone in general when going into a shop or bakery - if you didn't they would pointedly say it to you. The same when passing a stranger in the street.
Moving back to England I would do the same at first but often got funny looks or people would just put their heads down and avoid eye contact. Very sad.
I often end up in conversation with strangers and "oversharing". It's common with ADHD!

DollyRocker Tue 30-Dec-25 16:28:28

I'll talk to anyone, my dad was gregarious and I seem to have inherited this trait. I guess I'm nosey & interested in what people have to say. If they're suspicious or unfriendly I just find someone else to yap to incase they think I'm a criminal, serial killer or deranged.

CariadAgain Tue 30-Dec-25 14:01:50

No idea about motorhomes and caravans - but I did find people were quite chatty when I was on a barge holiday one time - ie doing a sorta circular trip from England to Wales and back again.

fluff Tue 30-Dec-25 13:42:49

I was told that people in motorhomes and caravans were all very friendly, what a disappointment when we stayed on a site, and as I was walking through barely anyone acknowledged my good mornings, and not one of them initiated a good morning greeting.

cc Tue 30-Dec-25 10:41:41

SunnySusie

I usually say hello to those around me on planes, but I find they rarely want to talk. However the exception was a nine hour flight from London to Calgary where the lady next to me talked for the ENTIRE flight. I was in the middle seat of three and DH was next to me one side and this lady the other. She told me her life history, plus the history of most of her family. It was all very interesting but quite exhausting.

My husband used to travel by plane all the time as he often worked overseas, and his idea of hell was to be seated next to a granny on her way to Australia to see her grandchildren, all he wanted was to sleep, not to chat.

cc Tue 30-Dec-25 10:40:02

I often find that older ladies talk to me on the bus or in queues. I don't often start the conversations as I know some people don't like it, but do speak to them if they smile and say hello.
If my grandchildren are with me they always ask me if I know the lady and tell me not to speak to strangers.
I must have an approachable face I think, unfortunately this also means that weird people come and sit next to me too!

Beebee24 Mon 29-Dec-25 20:06:24

I no longer live in the UK and I really miss chatting to strangers as it just doesn't happen here. It's one reason I like to go back.

Taransay Mon 29-Dec-25 20:00:49

My DH loves to chat to strangers. Waiting to check in at the airport after a holiday he struck up conversation with a couple. One year later ,same airport , same queue …yes same couple !! The conversation continued from the previous year.

Jojo1950 Mon 29-Dec-25 19:45:45

All the time. I’m a good listener!

SunnySusie Mon 29-Dec-25 19:13:57

I usually say hello to those around me on planes, but I find they rarely want to talk. However the exception was a nine hour flight from London to Calgary where the lady next to me talked for the ENTIRE flight. I was in the middle seat of three and DH was next to me one side and this lady the other. She told me her life history, plus the history of most of her family. It was all very interesting but quite exhausting.

kjmpde Mon 29-Dec-25 18:51:53

I think the activity of talking to strangers is very much dependent upon where you live . I was brought up in the Midlands and it was common place. Now further south and people don't really want to interact.

georgiejg Mon 29-Dec-25 18:37:21

Strangers are just people we haven't met yet.

madeleine45 Mon 29-Dec-25 18:12:08

I smile and say good morning or whatever, and get a range of replies from a pleasant reply to ignoring, but to me it is courteous behaviour when you are walking along a path somewhere. I now have some friends that I have known for years who I first met through just saying good morning. Also as I am a singer, quite often if I am out on my own I will be singing, anything from opera to portuguese fado to folk music and have usually had pleasant responses from people, many of whom have said - you sound very happy , or , it is good to hear someone singing etc. I get a range of responses from that to totally blanking me or turning off on another path. Doesnt bother me, they are entitled to be quiet if they wish and I dont intrude on someone who obviously does not want to make any contact with me

Eddieslass Mon 29-Dec-25 17:40:31

I’ve found that more people answer when I say hello to them these days and think it started during Covid when more people were out walking.

PamelaJ1 Mon 29-Dec-25 17:15:10

Maremia

On buses, yes, also trains, but never planes. Wonder why not?
More stress, being on a plane?

You may have to sit next to them for a long long time! In my experience we start chatting as we begin to land.

gwyneth28 Mon 29-Dec-25 17:08:00

I'm a Yorkshire girl and we're used to chatting to anyone, on the odd occasion I've gone down south the amount of times I've been absolutely ignored even when I've just said 'Good morning'!