Would you tell her?

Make no comment

When she looks nice I would compliment her, when she looks any different I would mention it. What she wears is her choice. The only time I ever need to mention my OH choice of what to wear is on the rare occasion that he wears a tie…….he is colour blind and he sometimes chooses one that clashes with his shirt…….thats all, no criticism, no drama!

I agree with what others have written. If your friend feels happy in her clothes thats fine. I certainly wouldn't want to be the 'friend' who hurt her feelings.

NOYB

i would let her be, no point in saying something that might cause you to fall out. i am 62 and due to problems with legs and feet and i wear straight leg jogging trousers and trainers all the time, i buy nice tops, cardigans and jumpers, i never wear anything low cut or off the shoulder, i know i am 62 and not 22 when the fashion at that time was the skirts with the split up the side and blouses that showed of my 44c bust. but it is each to there own.

And Daphne Selfe.

I had to look her up Dickens as I’m a curious person.

"And rafichagran no not catty, my friend is slim and looks after her fitness by doing lots of sports, as a result she has muscular calves."

So what I dont find that unattractive it shows she looks after herself. Sounds good to me. You also got a dig in about her looking older. I find what you said about your friend unpleasant.

How about..^sort of letting her decide^

When you are out with her and she is dressed in the way you feel really doesnt do any favours, how about saying "lets get a photo of the two of us to remember us" and ask a third party with your mobile. When she see it, she can decide for herself? That would be the limit of me saying anything I think.

I would actually appreciate being told nicely what really suits me and what doesn't, I'm not that confident. I did get a short skirt from a charity shop with leggings, the mirror told me..."Don't go there", even tho my legs are OK shape wise for leggings, not slim but good enough. I like bright clothes tho no need to hide away, walk tall, walk proud whatever.

The thing about long hair depends on your face. Faces that have taken a bit of a saggy direction, long hair can emphasise that downward movement look. (can look fab piled up on top, however)

Say nothing. It's just your opinion - and people will always comment about people who don't conform - especially women. Yes! purple hats!

Though I might be tempted to buy her a present of some of the fabulous Llame leggings. They are affordable and very colourful, soft and, imo, look great.
PS I am not related to them at all, but have many friends over 60 who love them. Many many colours and designs and feel fab to wear.
PPS. Wish I had slim legs! I expect I get whispered comments about having too fat legs for leggings! Two examples.
llamaleisure.com/products/leggings-for-women-cherry-blossom

llamaleisure.com/products/springtime-blooms-pocket-leggings

crazyH

I wonder what the OP will say about my skinny legs !!!

I don’t care about your skinny legs because I don’t know you! I know my friend and I know she would be mortified to know what people are saying.

And rafichagran no not catty, my friend is slim and looks after her fitness by doing lots of sports, as a result she has muscular calves.

"The difference is, she & her friend are anonymous on here."

Vivaldi does being anonymous change what the OP said, she has the same feelings about her friend as the people she states are talking about her.

Leave the woman alone and say nothing to her.

Keep quiet. At her age she knows how she looks and does not care or likes it. Tell her if you want to loss a friend!

I wonder what the OP will say about my skinny legs !!!

rafichagran

Say nothing. Honestly, I agree with Paddyanne some of the remarks have been horrible.

The remark from the OP about friends legs being slim but not very nice stood out to me to be judgemental and catty, but she goes on to make the excuse she does not want her friend to hear what others are saying, yet she is saying the same herself.

I do not wear mini skirts or shorts only because I don't like myself in them. I do though, dress to please myself and have been told that sometimes I have a goth look when dressed in black with my skull earings. I don't care what people think.

A work colleague a year younger than me wore short skirts and looked amazing she had the personality to carry it off.

The difference is, she & her friend are anonymous on here.

Say nothing. Honestly, I agree with Paddyanne some of the remarks have been horrible.

The remark from the OP about friends legs being slim but not very nice stood out to me to be judgemental and catty, but she goes on to make the excuse she does not want her friend to hear what others are saying, yet she is saying the same herself.

I do not wear mini skirts or shorts only because I don't like myself in them. I do though, dress to please myself and have been told that sometimes I have a goth look when dressed in black with my skull earings. I don't care what people think.

A work colleague a year younger than me wore short skirts and looked amazing she had the personality to carry it off.

I know regarding the lady I know who wears minis and has her boobs out that she categorically would not change the way she dresses if she was told people were commenting or laughing. She loves the way she dresses and so does her husband. I would say leave your friend alone.

I would probably say something, just because others are talking behind her back. There is a saying, if you wore it the first time round, it's probably too late to wear it when it gets re-invented.

Maybe just bring the saying up over someone else's clothes, she might just ask "what about me & my mini's?". Then saying that she has good legs but there are outfits you think she looks much better in, might give her pause.

It may offend, but you're doing it for her, unlike some who are talking about her out of earshot & having a giggle.

There was a lady we all used to laugh at when we were young because she wore blusher like the cabbage patch dolls. Perfectly nice and canny old lady but no-one had thought to tell her how bizzare that looked.

I think I would keep quiet, but may suggest that a certain style may suit her better and certainly compliment her when she looks good. I think there are times when we all can make a fashion faux pas and I would hope my friends would suggest an alternative for me.

Bit difficult this one, sounds as if your friend doesn't bother really well best to leave it.

On the subject of long hair, had my cut recently from being long and the compliments I got as to how much younger I looked and how well I looked made me realize that long hair when older is not flattering at all. Still had my own colour but long grey hair is a no-no to me, I personally don't think anything attractive about it at all. But as we all say, each to their own!

I agree with Aveline. If she wants to look silly and bit sad that it up to her. She obviously thinks she looks fab.

I would just leave her to get on with it.

She must not feel the cold too much in the winter..Does she buy thermal versions from Damart!

is she like Marina in the last of the summer wine lol

I would be telling the commenters to mind their own business

Cossy Let's face it, we have no idea who is and isn't wearing knickers!

I would agree with previous comments that saying nothing would be the best way. Or, as others have also suggested, compliment your friend when you think she looks good. Maybe, if she wears something you don't think looks good on her, you could say something along the lines of "I tell you what, (insert whatever you have in mind) would go with that and look really good".

Ultimately, if someone likes, and feels comfortable wearing, certain items of clothing, it's really their business alone. But I do understand your concerns as her friend and your dilemma.

As for others commenting, maybe you could show loyalty to your friend by telling those making the critical comments that it's up to her what she wears, and they should either tell her to her face or just keep their remarks to themselves.