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Christmas Card News

(22 Posts)
Marmight Wed 12-Dec-18 18:28:25

So far, I've received 14 Christmas cards from old friends. The news contained therein : 2 have had stem cell treatment, 1 has had a kidney transplant, 1 has Parkinson's Dementia and is in a nursing home and 1 has brain cancer. I feel quite depressed and dread reading any more bad news. Then there was The One who always sends The Letter. They've just celebrated their 45th Anniversary, as would I, had DH lived. They celebrated on a cruise to New York. This too upset me - what could have been & the little green man perched on my shoulder until DD reminded me that their eldest DD was killed while on a gap year in Oz. On the upside, one has married again and another has just become a granny, so it isn't all doom & gloom.
I await the post with trepidation ....

Bridgeit Wed 12-Dec-18 18:38:47

Perhaps be pleased that you have 14 people who still keep in touch & value your friendship. Focus on the fact that we all enjoy & suffer from the ups & downs in life.
Best wishes, think happy thoughts & memories

Izabella Wed 12-Dec-18 18:41:38

This is my scenario at the moment Marmite with another funeral tomorrow. I await some joyous news hopefully.

BlueBelle Wed 12-Dec-18 19:27:40

I ve received 21 cards so far and not a letter or message in any apart from happy Christmas You ve been very unlucky with all that info no wonder you feel depressed

sodapop Wed 12-Dec-18 20:38:53

Yes it would depress me too Marmight let's hope you have some Merry Christmas cards soon.

NanKate Wed 12-Dec-18 20:57:01

Slightly off piste. Since last year of my WI one died yesterday, another has terminal cancer, another can hardly walk and has early dementia, another in hospital with a stroke, two have heart attacks, the list goes on.

I suppose as we are all in our 70s/80s this can only be expected.

sodapop Thu 13-Dec-18 08:46:10

That's sad NanKate but think also of the people you know who are getting along well. Sometimes it's good to think of the positives as well.

MawBroon Thu 13-Dec-18 08:51:08

With you on that Marmight it’s not the smug Round Robins that get me, I can cheerfully bin them, but I sometimes feel I can barely bear more bad news. DD’s godmother tells me she has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer “started chemo, but remaining positive” -typically brave. sad

Nandalot Thu 13-Dec-18 09:03:45

Yes, Sodapop, this was brought home to me yesterday by a very brave lady. Her young son died this time last year, her husband has had heart problems all this year and he also had a cancer detected very recently, though mercifully early enough. She was talking to another friend who has been through a lot and they were agreeing that they had a lot to be thankful for..and she meant it. She is inspirational.

evianers Thu 13-Dec-18 10:58:14

As we live quite far away from friends, {having lived all over the world} the last three years have been extremely embarrassing to find that where we have sent cards, the person has actually died and the spouse has not informed us until our [probably unwanted] card arrived. Awful that this has now happened three years in a row.

moggie57 Thu 13-Dec-18 11:09:17

everybody hurts and everyone has something. but these friends have got YOU.. i would feel truly blessed to get 14 cards. when i wrote my cards the other day my address book held about 12 people .i realised they had all passed on. i thank god that i am still here despite my disabilties/illness. make every day count.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Thu 13-Dec-18 13:34:49

I feel for you Marmight as we all have our ups and downs but you seem to have had a lot of bad news all at once which can be overwhelming. Dare I say, try to look at the bright side? It's there somewhere even if it looks a bit hidden.

paddyann Thu 13-Dec-18 13:55:23

4 funerals here in the last few weeks,our best man the last one .He was just 60 .Its always at the back of your mind who might be next ,I have knots in my stomach every morning when I wake .Hopefully see the year out without any more

NanKate Thu 13-Dec-18 14:12:30

Yes Sodapop I agree being positive is so important. I think I have felt rather down recently as it is one of my closest friends in the WI who has early dementia which has come on so quickly and I feel shocked by this.

Auntieflo Thu 13-Dec-18 15:15:17

Marmight. I’m sorry you are feeling down at the moment, but how would you have felt if these old friends had not told you of their illnesses?
I know it can be depressing, but perhaps in a way, they are reaching out for a bit of virtual hand holding.

grammargran Thu 13-Dec-18 16:17:55

Goodness, I find all this talk of news, good or bad, difficult - because it’s difficult to know what to do for the best. People don’t seem to want to hear about the good things that are happening in the lives of others - they come across as ‘smug’ - but, on the other hand, neither do they want to hear about the bad things - it’s too depressing to read about. I love hearing once a year from those friends who used to be close but have moved away; from those who used to be neighbours with children the same age who have now grown. Now, all these comments and those on the Round Robin thread have made me doubt myself, in spite of friends saying they enjoy hearing from me and our annual catch up. The last few cards I have opened recently have nearly all had a newsy message or an extra slip of paper or photograph in. Perhaps I’ve just been lucky in my friends - some going way back to school days (and I’m 80 next year!) Should I stop writing?

Grannyanna12345 Thu 13-Dec-18 20:27:30

No grammargran, don’t stop writing! It’s good to receive news from those friends we no longer see but who still matter, and to be happy with them when it’s good and to feel with them when it isn’t. If anyone bins my letters without reading them, then that’s up to them, but I always read theirs anyway!

Nonnatimesfour Thu 13-Dec-18 23:26:16

It is heart-wrenching to receive this type of news at Christmas, I always think it's a shame that people give out their bad news with Christmas greetings and it is depressing. I hope you receive more Christmas cards with cheery messages. Take care.

Mapleleaf Fri 14-Dec-18 16:11:08

I think it is important to keep in communication with family and friends where possible. Sometimes the news is good, other times not so good, but I suppose that is life, and personally, I want to hear the news, whatever it is, rather than be kept in ignorance. It's just that at this time of year, sad news and sad memories can weigh rather heavily.

Marmight Fri 14-Dec-18 20:07:23

....only one death so far since I posted! I love receiving, and sending, cards. It's the only way I keep in touch with some folk from way, way back and bad news is inevitable as we age. Not that I'm that old yet wink

Onestepbeyond Fri 14-Dec-18 23:46:08

Well you are 14 cards up on me tchsmile

grannyactivist Sat 15-Dec-18 00:14:14

I had a wry smile when reading your post Marmight. In my cards this year I only included news of my ever increasing number of grandchildren - on the basis that at this time of the year I've usually had some kind of medical problem to report and I'm fed up of mentioning my poor health!