Cooking - I’ve forgotten how!

I'm almost 72, and though I still want to do the 'catering'. It does make me anxious now. I'll be catering for eleven at New Year, including vegetarians and children who have aversions to a number of flavours, consistencies etc. At the same time, one DD, SIL and two GD's will be staying for a couple of days. I'm pleased that they won't arrive until early New Year's Eve as it'll give me the whole day to prepare, though I will do as much as possible in advance. I remember when my mother, in her seventies, announced, quite rightly, that that was the last Christmas lunch that she was doing. All of my similarly aged friends and relatives agree that they have far fewer visitors now than before, tending to meet up outside their homes, and it's to do with being less keen to cater in the main, plus being less able in some cases.

Yep! Same here, actually its all the meal making that's gone awry especially the evening meal We'll have been married 60 years next May and when you add up all the teas/suppers (whatever you call it) I've made in this time its one h3ll of a lot.
My best ever was the Yorkshire puddings. I've always been the Yorkshire pudding Queen of the family - they always rose to the oven roof with a nice round dip in the middle for the gravy BUT:- I'd show off to a new friend just how easy it was. So off we go - equal volumes of egg, flour and milk + water. Hot oven, fat sizzling, pour in batter, wait half an hour or so and serve ...................... +and on that occasion a batch of flat solid biscuits that even the dog wouldn't eat.

Serve me right for showing off.

Now if family come I get as many as I need of those boxes of 'Simple to Cook joints (beef, lamb, chicken or whatever) which serve 2 people, and they're foolproof (though the Yorkies are ok when I'm not trying to show off). Its expensive but it saves a mountain of worry.

OMG Thought it was just me and sis. We seem to be unable to put a list together, let alone cook. Heaven help us on Xmas day. A few pernods ( our tipple of choice on Xmas morn) should see us right. Won't make us cook better but we won't care !

I always make loads of lists when cooking the turkey etc. The night before I write down all my timings, and each food item goes on the list. So far, I've never forgotten any bits of food but there has to be a first time!! This year going to son and his wife (and he's an excellent cook) for Christmas. First time I wont have fed the 5,000 on Christmas day for well over 40 years! Looking forward to seeing the grandchildren (6 and 3) putting out their stockings etc etc.

I think I must be very lucky. I retired 3 years ago after working an extra 8 years (due to ex dropping me in a financial hole). Now I have the time I really love cooking and trying new recipes on poor innocent friends and relatives. If they visit they're agreeing to be guineapigs! I and they seem to like the experience, and I haven't poisoned anyone yet. What more could I ask for?

Thank you EllaB for bringing this cooking hassle to the forefront.
I too get anxious making the Christmas dinner and all that goes with it.
Keeping the plates warm was always a hassle for me so this year I have bought an electric plate warmer. It’s like an electric blanket for plates. Tried it out and it’s fab.
Happy cooking all aaagh x

I know what you all mean....last year I left the parsnips in oven . No one missed or noticed ...that’s because I’m still trying to do it all on my own from scratch.....I don’t mind the meat and veg prep , but am now drawing the line at doing three separate desserts made from scratch....this year I’ll be investigating Iceland...M&S.... Waitrose , to see just what they have to offer.

Reading this thread reminded me of the trouble I used to go to over Christmas dinner and as no one else ever mentions doing the same makes me wonder where I got the idea from.

On Christmas Eve I always boned the turkey!!! The bones and skin were roasted in the oven then popped into the pressure cooker to make stock.
The turkey meat was well seasoned West Indian style (rubbed all over with finely chopped up onions, garlic, celery, chive, thyme, salt, pepper, vinegar etc.) and little cuts made to get the seasoning well into the meat, all popped in a sealed container to marinate overnight while the stuffing was made from minced pork with more of the West Indian seasoning plus coarsely chopped red and green peppers.
Christmas morning the turkey crown was placed over a mound of pork stuffing in the oiled roasting tin and the legs with stuffing down the middle replacing the bones assembled on either side so it looked like it did before de boning. Streaky bacon to cover then slowly roasted to perfection with the roast veg around it.
At the table it was a doddle to carve and everyone thoroughly enjoyed it.
Whew! Haven't attempted that for 20 years.

I do sympathise with you all. I'm finding it particularly difficult to remember Christmas cooking as it's only done once a year and I didn't use recipe books! I used to make fruit cakes regularly but since my heart condition started I find standing difficult and gave up for several years. I made one a few weeks ago, thinking pull myself together and get on with it, and luckily I found my mother's recipe which I'd always used. I'd written it out for my daughters. What a joy that was. I wish I'd written a lot more things down in the days when I still had a decent memory! Best wishes to you all. I love gransnet!

I cook for the grandchildren every day.
I don't do nuggets or fingers.
All home cooked. Especially the soup. Soup goes by colour. We have red soup (mainly carrots) we have white soup (either rice or cauliflower) we have green soup (either pea or brocoli)
Not all the grandchildren like vegetables. BUT, hey ho, they don't know what's in the soup!!!!!!
One of their favourites is "chicken soup without the chicken" they actually ask for this. Rice, lots of leek and some carrots.
Make your food fun. I don't follow recipes. I could never make the same thing again.
BUT I always get clean plates.
Also another thing I do. Make more than you need.
Freeze it without labels.
Then when you defrost it.
It's a surprise.

I can still cook, but it is a big effort, and with arthritis I don't have as much energy to lay on elaborate meals. It's as much heaving piles of plates around, stacking dishwashers, and moving tables as anything else. What does annoy us is that people in the extended family assume that it will be a pleasure for us to provide them all with three meals a day for a week - after all, we are retired and have nothing better to do. It will be lovely for us to see the children and enjoy some family time. Luckily, we have found a local Airbnb...

I dont think its forgetting, I think it is losing the motivation to do it. After spending years of working full time and doing all the cooking, shopping, washing, ironing, cleaning, going to all appointments and events of the children, I am now absolutely fed up of it and I've now got the time as just retired.

Also I’ve found that a glass of Buck’s Fizz helps the relaxation process greatly but that second glass can lead to all sorts going wrong, stuff being left in the oven etc!!

Yes, definitely identify with this. I used to regularly do Sunday dinner for family also but really hate doing it now but feel mean for not doing it. I’m sure though that we didn’t expect my Mum to keep doing dinners for us when she became a bit older, we’d invite her and Dad to ours. It doesn’t seem to happen that way now. I also look back at all the stuff I used to manage in an average day...it’s scary..

EllieB52 how I sympathise with you. I panic now and nothing seems to go right any more. Yet I used to do great stuff and enjoyed doing it, not any more.
My hubby cannot understand
my fears. I avoid cooking for
guests if I can now or resort to
M&S ready prepared which isnt
very economical. I have noticed
though that people seem to be
getting 'fussier' and more
demanding and bringing their
children up to be the same. The
last time I had a branch of the
family for a meal I'd provided a
lovely vegetarian option for DIL
avoiding the options id been pre
informed were 'boring. The
mains were great but before
they even sat down the kids
were shouting out what they
would or would not eat yet DS
assured me they ate it at home!
Pudd was loudly demanded
before mains were eaten and
A selection asked for!

Thank you all for your description of what has been happening with me. I had chemotherapy and radiotherapy 5 years ago and ever since, my husband has done most of the meals. I can still bake and make puddings but, after bringing up a family with 3 children and frequently having their friends around too, now I dread having friends and relatives to stay /eat.
But, being 71, I now see this can be the norm, so thank you all!

I was trying to remember how to do roast potatoes for my Christmas dinner yesterday as it is not something I normally do for myself.

Fortunately I can still do it with planning and lists but I don't enjoy it except for the odd urge to do a big batch cook for the freezer. Then I find I just don't fancy any of those freezer meals and often just have a sandwich!
The joys of living alone ?

I have become scared to cook. Buy all the goods which then get fed to the dog as i am unable to cook. Ready meals are just not the same. Lost the ability when my husband was ill and died. On my own so just snack allday

Oh gosh I find this thread oddly comforting. Why is it so many of us have lost confidence? Partly it must be because we are out of practice but that can't be all of it.

I am now 74 years old and everyone on this post I can identify with.

If my son and two grandsons come to stay, I have no choice but to cook them a meal, but I don’t enjoy it one little bit.

I seem to have lost my confidence and get timings wrong, or I usually either cook too much or too little food.
I agree with others. After cooking for almost a century, I’ve had enough.
I am ok with salads and a cold spread, which is what I usually do if visiting for the day.
Last August, my family invited themselves to stay for a week.
I was dreading it. I had to cook some meals, but found the whole thing utterly stressful and tiring.
I hate to say it, but I was glad when they had gone home.

As some have said, I am lost in admiration of my younger self! Cooking, sewing, decorating, patching ceilings, rehanging doors, replacing a toilet, tiling, repairing floors etc. etc, etc. (we had a big old house and no money!)
I was remembering this when I was asking my daughter to come and put the Angel on the Christmas tree for me.

I used to let rooms to students, full board and so including my kids there would usually be 8 of us at the table. I had to find meals that teenagers enjoyed while at the same time being nutritious and healthy enough that their visiting parents wouldn't complain! I reckon it's my years of doing that which burnt me out. I now have only one of those combi microwave convection ovens, counter top size, and a single gas ring. Any more than 3 people to eat and we have no choice but to get takeaway!

Another one here who has lost both confidence and enthusiasm. We have young relatives coming to lunch tomorrow, both good cooks, and I am losing sleep over a really pretty simple lunch. What is going on with us?

I don't feel such a failure now I see others daying what I feel. Used to regularly hold dinner parties for 8-12 people and entertain overseas visitors. Now I panic when a couple of younger friends, who are excellent cooks, not put out any anything, come to visit. Can't really get away with store bought meals so have to deal with it! Luckily it usually turns out OK but still feel so unsure of myself.