Frazzled out by 3pm on Christmas Day?

Answer A, every time. Other people , (well the ones I know) like to feel they are contributing, it makes them feel included. Even when family come for visits throughout the year, they will often bring or make puddings/cakes etc and always help with clearing up. When hosting friends & they ask I'll always say bring any treats/drinks that you'd like. That way, there's always something they look forward to & gives them a chance to buy an indulgent treat that they probably wouldn't do normally. I think it adds to the atmosphere letting others contribute like this. I do have one regular guest who brings nothing and does nothing and I find it quite wearing. A 50 year friendship overrides this though & they do have other qualities that outweighs their manners as a guest.

We’re going to our son’s house this year. Sometimes we go to our other son’s house. Last year we were in New Zealand at our daughter’s.
We did many, many years of Christmas’s, always with either my parents or my husband’s parents staying with us. Now we mainly go to one of the children’s houses. We’re having them over on Boxing Day and doing a buffet. Christmas Day will be us, both our sons and families, our daughter in law’s daughter and family. It’ll be lovely.

V3ra

Witzend we tried having Christmas dinner in the early evening, but found people had picked at the snacks and chocolates all afternoon and weren't hungry!

This year my daughter is hosting us and says she wants to cook the roast dinner on Christmas Eve, leaving Christmas Day free to enjoy the time with her children and their presents.
I'm all in favour as I would have done the same if they'd been coming here.

I do a sort of canapés-type ‘starter’ at around 3, usually nice party food bits from M&S.
I draw the line now at trying to get dinner on the table anywhere near lunchtime - too much of a rush for the cook. Plus a late dinner means hardly anybody ever wants anything later - anyone who does can pick at the turkey/ham etc.

Definitely A Oh how lovely thank you and then I am specific about what help would be appreciated. Not so much in bringing food along but about helping out on the day. Clearing the table yes please! Washing the dishes/stacking the dishwasher yes please! Putting china and cutlery away yes please! Making a cup of tea or pouring me another drink yes please! Time for me to put my feet up after cooking and serving Christmas lunch. It's my time now!

We have separate holiday meals for our 4 daughters and their larger families. Typically Advent Sunday soon after Church. They each choose their own menu, we cook in advance that which is possible, clean up after they leave rather than wasting time in the moment. Pressies, then on their way to their homes. Easy.

For us we have Christmas together after Church, around 1 in the afternoon, off to walk dogs by 2 or so. I like things fast, easy, and done.

They all pop round, in and out, whenever they fancy before and after Christmas - but not at their sisters' (or our) set Christmas Lunch times.

This year, for the first time in 40 years, someone else in our family will be hosting Christmas Day! My daughter has invited me and DH, our other daughter, her partner and their 10 month old baby to their (quite small) house. It will be a squash as the table only seats six and there will be nine of of us so it will be interesting and chaotic, but fun.

I've gradually gone from an A to a B. For the last ten years or so my 2 DDs have contributed either a dessert or a side-dish to our Christmas dinner and have brought lots of "picky bits" for the evening. They are also very good at clearing up after the meal and loading the dishwasher while I put me feet up as much as I can with various excited grandchildren/tired babies around!

When I hit 80 I decided to say I couldn’t do it anymore (a 3 course meal on New Year’s Day) and to my surprise the reaction was fine and full of understanding. The numbers had grown over the years and our dining table hadn’t! I am no longer the nimble minded chef of past years. We take them out later on for a Sunday lunch. My daughter does Christmas Dinner on Christmas Eve and I do another just for us on Christmas Day.

We supply the venue ( our house!) And most of food.....My DD and SIL cook and provide all meat and deserts....my 2 DSs come with alcohol and do all washing up and provide entertainment for 3 GDs.... my 87 Yr old DM just brings herself and we all wait on her hand and foot all day.... she's loves watching 'the madness' as she calls it of Christmas Day

Witzend we tried having Christmas dinner in the early evening, but found people had picked at the snacks and chocolates all afternoon and weren't hungry!

This year my daughter is hosting us and says she wants to cook the roast dinner on Christmas Eve, leaving Christmas Day free to enjoy the time with her children and their presents.
I'm all in favour as I would have done the same if they'd been coming here.

Mine would be a B, since if catering I’m usually well organised and my kitchen isn’t exactly huge, so I really don’t want people cluttering it up and almost invariably standing in front of whichever cupboard or drawer I need to get to.

Whoever it is can always top up my Buck’s Fizz though - but not too often, or I’ll be repeating the scenario from many years ago, when I completely forgot the potatoes - hadn’t even parboiled them, so dinner ended up being on the table at around 5pm, instead of the usual 3-ish.

However that worked so well - everyone was that much more ready for it - that we’ve had it at 5 or 6 ever since.

And dh (with helpers) will always do the clearing away/loading the dishwasher/restoring the bomb-site kitchen to order, while I take my ease on the sofa. 🙂🎄🍷

My response has always been B but I’m trying to make myself e more of an A person. Having said that I do try to have everything done in advance. My biggest problem is trying to persuade people not to talk to me while I’m doing the last bits, I’m hearing impaired and trying to work out what they’re saying takes up more brain space than I can spare.

I try to get everything done in advance so there is nothing for me to do on Christmas Day.

I do one meal a day during the holiday season and otherwise people fettle for themselves.Tthey know where the breakfast materials all and its salad andd cold meat that they fetch for themselves in the evening.

It used to be ‘B’ every time. Now it could be either depending on the event and how many people I’m trying to feed. I am very specific about tasks or items, family know and understand. They say it’s because I’m a control freak! Me? Maybe .

I find that most people want to help out in some way, it is uncomfortable to sit and watch one person doing everything.

A - but it has to be thought out carefully in advance so I know what I want people to do.

If I haven't had a chance to do that then it's B. Or 'I'll let you know'.

B
"Please be happy and timely" (Hate wasting time)

A). I’m having 20 odd here on Christmas Eve, and am responding to every ‘what can I do/bring?’ with a specific item or task.

I hope that the family members who are hosting us on Christmas Day will do the same.

Always found myself saying ' No, I'm fine ' automatically, then one year caved in and now can't wait to see what tasty treats my
big beardy veggie son in law whips up

Ive offloaded the whole of Christmas to my sons house and next year ( if I’m still here) it will hopefully be my daughters.

I do family meals during the year so we all take a turn.

My answer is always, ‘Yes please!’ To whatever it is.

The only job I don’t delegate is loading the dishwasher. 😂

I know exactly what you mean! I’m also a ‘no, I’m fine’ person but this year it’s just the two of us for Christmas Day and Boxing Day. Hopefully later in the week people will relieved to have something simple and light! 🤞

I'm always a B

I don’t have the family over till Boxing Day which we treat as our Christmas Day. My answer would be “no it’s alright I’m fine”

I’m such a martyr!!