Is Your Christmas Card List Getting Shorter

I've sent fewer over the years, and fewer still this year.
When Mum died 7 years ago, I decided, as the eldest child of the eldest child on my Dad's side to take on her matriarchal role of sending cards to the wider family. Unfortunately, some of the overseas addresses weren't up to date, and they were returned, and I found this year that I couldn't even remember who exactly some of these friends of Mum's were, so I didn't send them either. I think I've only had one card from someone on the "not any more" list.

I do give cards to every one of my fellow residents in our supported living apartments and to every staff member. On the one hand, I think that cards are really for the people we don't see on a daily basis, not so much for those whom we do but I'm a softy, and can't bear the thought of anyone feeling forgotten.

I get less than I did 10 years ago but I m a few up up on last year 😀
I love cards, giving and receiving it makes Christmas for me

I can understand people who don’t send them but blimey your post sounds miserable karmalady not the action the way you ve put it

It is sad when the reason for getting fewer cards is that people have died, but the idea of crossing people (whom you know are alive) off a list for non-reciprocation shows, to me, the transactional nature of the card ritual.

If sending cards is a sign of caring for people, does that care stop when they decide that they aren’t doing it this year? Maybe because of illness, concern for the environment, lack of spare money or just being too busy, many people opt out of what is, at bottom, a commercial enterprise. We have been told by clever advertising that the number of cards we get signifies our popularity, how much people care about us or ‘bother with’ us, but the manufacturers make a fortune out of bits of paper with mass-produced greetings being marketed as a replacement for visiting, talking on the phone or keeping in touch by messaging or chatting online.

It saddens me to see the hurt that can be caused by the mismatch between people who continue to see cards in this way and those who refuse to be guilt-tripped into playing along. It gets trickier to break the cycle when people are so convinced that not sending cards is a moral failing. It is amusing, however, when despite this the complainers only send them as long as they get them back

I’d be grateful not to be updated on seizures and brain tumours etc as the point of Christmas cards is to send Christmas greetings. I’d prefer an email update on various health/bereavement issues nearer the time they happened.

As I say every year, cards are not a thing in Germany. Those we send to German friends and relatives are often reciprocated with a very surprised telephone call or an e-mail. DH writes to all but a few of his friends and relatives by e-mail.

They are completely baffled by the idea of giving cards to people you see regularly or will be seeing around Christmas.

Birthday cards are not really a thing either, except at work, where they go round the office for everyone to sign.

My sister-in-law will come in and comment on the number of cards we have been sent, which we hang on a string on the hall wall, probably with exactly the same words as every year.

We sent about 45 this year, many to friends and family in the UK, some with a round robin letter included, mainly to old friends who sent a letter with their card. Not all of them reciprocate, but mostly they are acknowledged with a phone call or an email.

With the cost of postage in the UK as it is (much higher than here) I have told people I am not offended if they don't send me a card.

I didn't answer the OP there. Yes, a few people have died, and there are one or two rare friends/acquaintances/colleagues from way back whom I have decided not to bother with any more, but occasionally a name can get added to the list, so it has stayed relatively stable for as long as I can remember.

Numbers are falling, mainly because friends and family are dying. A few are sending email messages to say they are donating to charity - but what about recipeints who may not have email?

Others send email cards. I do not 'get' email cards. The point of a card is to put it on display.You cannot display an email card. It can only be a private pleasure.

Finally there are those now with dementia and in care homes. I still send them cards, but know here will be no return.

I don’t appreciate email cards at all I like the tradition of opening an actual card call me old fashioned I don’t mind.

Bonnybanko

I love to send cards it doesn’t bother me if I don’t receive one back
My pleasure is in the giving NOT in the receiving 😘

This👍

Thank you for the commiserations re my earlier post. No, Nanna8 not in Australia, though I feel for those poor souls, it looks awful. We are back in our house, albeit it’s not quite as I envisioned, and Christmas will happen, so we are a lot luckier than many folk.

In general I do send fewer cards than say ten years ago, due to deaths and so on. We’ve moved house as well so I no longer send to those locals and don’t yet know enough people here to give many.

I’m currently reading a book about Charles Dickens and Christmas. The publication of A Christmas Carol (which was written to draw attention to the divide between the wealthy and the impoverished in those times - some things never change) coincided with Henry Cole inventing the Christmas card, in 1843.

The card was invented because he was a busy man and didn’t have time to write his usual Yuletide letter to people, so a card was a sort of holding place. He didn’t expect cards to take off but it’s thought the coinciding with the publication of A Christmas Carol kick-started a trend that continues to this day.

I used to send about 45 and if I had not seen the person for many months I would say what has happened in my life, good or bad. With todays'postage being so high I think it a waste of money sending me a card with only love from X discovering he/she has moved to the other end of the country. It would be good to know why.

I have sent 7 cards each with a letter included.

The stamps have become a ridiculous price. I like sending and receiving cards but this year numbers are down. I’m sending e-cards to one or two people who I have forgotten on my list. My own children are depressing in not sending birthday or Christmas cards. Or even presents. I call Interflora Afterthoughtflora as usually they’ve forgotten mums birthday and typed in a few words in an order.

I found it sad this year going through my Christmas card list to see how many have died. So yes I do send fewer cards but will send them even if I don't get one back. I just like to wish everyone I know Happy Christmas.

I love having cards up in the house and still send about 30 plus those joint with DH. I think it’s a friendly custom and would be sad to see it die out. The Young don’t think in terms of postal communication any more. Agree that postal charges are now atrocious, also that e cards are pointless.

I don't think I will ever stop sending cards. I love to receive them too.

Our list is about the same - we lose some but acquire others.

I was so cross at the cost of postage stamps that any within fifteen miles we hand delivered on a sunny day. It was a pleasant ride around the villages. I know petrol costs but I was standing my ground against the outrageous amount charged for such an inferior service. I also culled people who were not close friends, just acquaintances who had over the years become a habit so the number of cards posted was halved.

Yesterday we got post for the first time in five days. The deliveries are really sparse at the moment, our poor postie is having to cover so many rounds because they cannot recruit staff.

I didn’t send any cards this year for two reasons. One I am upset with `Royal Nmail and the service they are providing, fewer deliveries each week, post arriving late, Hospital appoints missed because of late arrival of letter and no post office in our town of 24,00p. Secondly my daughter died last year and I think I was still in shock but this year I kept seeing cards to my lovely daughter etc and found myself getting upset. We use to take a lot of time in choosing the right card to send each. So no cards this year, just a large donation to a homeless charity

Definitely buying fewer cards year on year.

I still like to get cards from old friends particularly when meets up have been less frequent. So I welcome a personally written card with up- dates of what has been going on in their lives and with genuine friends they're not like those impersonal round Robin missives.

My feelings are younger generations don't really bother with what we grew up with and what with the increasing costs of stamps, I rather think it's a tradition that won't survive.

So sorry Barmyoldbat

Postage is outrageously expensive so many of my friends prefer to donate to charity…..or so they say?! I’m afraid no card this year for me means no card next year for them! All overseas friends get emails….and uk ones will too next year…..sad to loose the tradition but better for the environment and purse!

I don't send cards just to get a card back ! I send in the spirit of Christmas 'good will' to the people I want to wish well, regardless. And vice versa - if I receive a card from someone I don't particularly care for any more for whatever reason, I don't send them a card in return.

I send cards - not many, around 20.
It is now 21st December and I havent received any cards. The 20 that I do send, 8 of them are family; sisters, brothers, adult children. Athough I dont give to receive, it does feel a bit sad that I havent got any this year.

5 and l forgot one this year

I am sending and receiving less cards. No way am I sending abroad. Mostly, I will send a quick WhatsApp message

I suppose cards are a fashion like most things in social life. I still send around 40 (though I hand deliver any I can) and enjoy getting them, but my adult sons in their 40s have given up. I also think cards may well die out with our generation. I think it’s a shame as I like getting them, though writing them is a chore. For those who ‘give to charity’ instead, fair enough, but most cards we buy (all of mine actually) are linked to charities, and obviously the charities will stop being supported in this way if everyone stops buying cards.