NOW CLOSED: Competition: Win a signed copy of Oi Frog! and a Waitrose Yule log

With the cat on the mat, the hare on the chair, the boar on the floor and the stag on the flag there was no room anywhere for the frog, but then the bee flew round the tree, the rat chased the cat and the boar ran out the door leaving enough room for the dog and the frog to both sit on the log.

Santa claimed it was only banter, when accused of abuse by a Christmas goose.

I'll get my coat

owls sit on towels
goats sit on coats
a gnu sits on the loo

The pinto pony squashed one toe only, but the two-toed sloth sat on both.

PS should have read the instructions about 1 sentence, sorry
....so please ignore the last two lines of the above

Robins sit on Bobbins

Elves sit on shelves
wrapping Christmas gifts
while Santa packs them in his sleigh
and Rudolf whisks them all away.
...Everyone has a part to play
in celebrating Christmas day.

Are we too grownup to feel a thrill
As we light the Christmas tree?
Are we immune to cookies,
Christmas cards and Christmas glee?

Elves sat on the shelves

Who's judging this anyway?

Over indulgent Christmas imbibers
should lay off the gin and stick to the ciders.

(of the alcohol free kind of course )

These things are important.

Before I put any actual brain power into this, can you please tell me which Waitrose chocolate Yule log is on offer. Is it the 'old' Belgian chocolate one @ £5 or the 'new' one @ £9 (which doesn't sound quite so delicious)?

Thank you.

(not that we pronounce 'arse' as 'ass', you understand)

Or asses sit on their glasses (if you're from Up North...)

arses sit on their glasses (fuckity-do)

frogs like hot dogs

Leopards sit on Shepherds (sorry to any shepherds out there !!)

Moths sit on cloths
And sorry for following on from your idea there threesugars but how about piglets sit on twiglets?

Pigs sit on twigs!

The Goblin-Shark,
sits in the dark,
Merrily playing
the Christmas harp!

The Panda Ant,
rests on the plant,
thinking about presents,
and what to buy for his aunt!

The Hummingbird Hawk Moth,
alights on a cloth,
starts cleaning for Christmas.
as slow as a sloth.

The Mantis Shrimp,
Has built his own Chrimbo Blimp!
He spared no expense,
on his blimp he won't skimp!

The Giant Isopod,
buries himself in the sod,
HATES being alone at Christmas,
all on his tod!

So Merry Christmas, dear Creatures,
with all your strange features,
And a happy New Year,
from all of us here! :-)