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Coronavirus

I'm worried, dh doesn't care

(17 Posts)
Lilythepink Tue 17-Mar-20 14:45:54

I'm avoiding non-essential contact as per government guidelines and dh has grudgingly agreed to do so too... in a fashion. Neither of us has symptoms yet so we're still doing essential stuff like collecting medication and food shopping. He's in his sixties and diabetic but refuses to think of himself as in a vulnerable group. He's the sort that climbs the walls if he can't go out for a day or two and he's already getting grumpy, insisting he's going to visit his daughter and other family up north (who are equally cynical of the government's advice), he says there's no way he's going 3 months without seeing them. I think it's so selfish as he'll bring anything he's picked up back here! I feel like telling him to stay up there for the three months if he goes. AIBU? We're bickering about it with him saying 'my family isn't worried like you'... like me and the rest of the country, I reply!! I feel so annoyed he'll put both our health at risk.

ginny Tue 17-Mar-20 14:52:03

He is being selfish. We all need to pull together and take the advice given , unless of course he had the qualifications to know better.
I would certainly tell him that if he goes , he can stay there till. this is all over.

Septimia Tue 17-Mar-20 15:28:36

I agree with ginny, if he goes he doesn't come back until it's safe.

We should have been going south for our granddaughter's birthday but have cancelled. I can't think of anything worse than being ill away from home. If the rest of us can do it, so can he - and he can still go for a walk even if reduces his outings.

M0nica Tue 17-Mar-20 15:45:43

If he goes, he stays. He isn't even going to a safe environment, as his family are as bad as him.

Or you move out.

AGAA4 Tue 17-Mar-20 15:59:49

I just despair of people like him. They are putting others at risk because of their own selfish behaviour. If he goes change the locks Lily!

H1954 Tue 17-Mar-20 16:07:26

Yes, he's being very selfish indeed! Rather like our neighbour; he is a heavy smoker and always short of breath. He as decided, on encouragement by his daughter, to self isolate. That's fair enough but he STILL expects me and my OH to go round and do jobs for him and we aren't in the best of health either. I'm really quite annoyed by his attitude, the day he spotted me in the garden whilst outside having a cigarette and the conversation was all one sided "oh poor me, I can't breath and I've got more tablets to take" NOT ONCE did he bother to ask if we were alright! Needless to say, I'm giving him a wide berth for the duration! Sorry GNetters, Rant over

Luckygirl Tue 17-Mar-20 16:35:05

Pack him off for the next 4 months.

I had better say no more as I have no patience whatsoever with people who are being ridiculous and putting others at risk. My language would be unacceptable.

H1954 Tue 17-Mar-20 16:46:07

Yes, Luckygirl, I had to choose my words carefully too! ??

sodapop Tue 17-Mar-20 17:16:37

Whilst I am still a bit sceptical about the drastic measures being employed I am sure that many of us on GN have family members in the medical profession. Selfish people are putting them even more at risk, my daughter has had all leave cancelled and has to be available to work anywhere within the service. Please think about medical staff and carers who are working flat out in difficult conditions.

shysal Tue 17-Mar-20 19:24:18

I was disgusted that Stanley, father of Boris Johnson, who is in his 70s, appeared on ITV's This Morning stating that if he wanted or needed to go to the pub he would still do so!

Daisymae Tue 17-Mar-20 19:35:42

Yes, he is being selfish but if he goes then he does need to isolate himself for 7 days on his return. It is the only reasonable thing to do. Numbers are going to increase in the next couple of weeks so he may have a change of heart.

CleoPanda Tue 17-Mar-20 19:49:08

Skype, Face time, phone calls, emails, letters. He doesn’t have to visit to keep in touch. We’re in a sudden global crisis. He needs to do his part and stay home. He is thinking only of himself. If he lived in another country with draconian rules, he would be arrested for risking lives. We will probably end up with similar rules if people continue to think only of themselves. Boris thinks we are a “mature nation” but unfortunately not everyone thinks in a sensible unselfish manner.

Lilythepink Tue 17-Mar-20 20:41:13

Thanks everyone, really appreciate your replies. I’m going to stand my ground.

Hetty58 Tue 17-Mar-20 20:48:52

Yes, do stand your ground. So many of us are being incredibly brave, changing our routines and facing up to solitude - all to protect ourselves and others. Tell him he's a wimp (from me)!

Hetty58 Tue 17-Mar-20 20:51:35

I'm in the opposite corner. I'm not over 70 but have slightly high BP. My children have demanded that I isolate myself and won't visit (with or without the grandchildren) - because they love me.

Baggs Wed 18-Mar-20 13:04:21

There is a letter in the Times today about the fact that the Peace handshake has been dropped by church services. An old woman told another member of the congregation that the peace handshake was the only time in her life when another human being touches her.

Sobering thought.

Lilythepink Thu 19-Mar-20 10:56:35

Thanks to you all. Dh seems at last to be waking up to the dangers and has agreed Facetiming with his family 'for a few weeks.' Sadly, I think it might be rather more than a few but I'm relieved he seems to have come round to the reality of the situation. Stay safe everyone x