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Do you think my OH is being unreasonable?

(16 Posts)
Alexa Mon 11-May-20 20:31:29

Ellan Vannin that is an interesting idea and I don't quite agree. Because even when someone is 'shielded', in voluntary lockdown, they might be slightly exposed to some small amount of virus. This small amount of virus might be sufficient to set off antigen sensitivity.

Beau1958 Fri 08-May-20 12:03:34

Thanks for all your thoughts. I am a worry guts. I will put it on the back burner for now and hope my OH doesn’t keep bringing it up.

Nannarose Fri 08-May-20 11:51:09

I gather that the problem is that you have to book soon. I would book a double room as normal, as a single room is not significantly cheaper. Travel is more of problem, but if he normally makes the arrangements, then why not leave him to do it, if you can afford it?
The nearer the time, either everything will be cancelled - so no problem, or it is all on.
If so, either things will be looking safer and you will feel happier about going.
Or, if not, then can you find an excuse, even just that you are 'not feeling very well',
As long as you can afford to risk the travel costs, then I would allow him to go ahead, and cross the bridge when you get to it.
Good luck

EllanVannin Fri 08-May-20 11:44:16

That said, those who are made to stay put for months won't be gaining any immunity by doing so and will be hit hard if the virus does strike, IMHO. It's barmy really but the risk you run.

EllanVannin Fri 08-May-20 11:40:41

The ferries are only sailing to carry freight and not passengers. There have been complaints about the British registered vehicles that have landed in Ireland as they'd said that our country is rife with Covid 19 and they don't want it spreading there.
Only essential travel is allowed to date. Don't know what the situation will be in August.

BlueSky Fri 08-May-20 11:22:21

But if things are going ahead they will be with safety restrictions in place, I don't think it will all be back to what we had before the virus for a long time. Anyway just wait and see how things pan out. You could stay at home if it still worries you and you'll have to practice safe distancing when back.

Grannynannywanny Fri 08-May-20 11:15:23

Beau1958 Ireland is still in lockdown. They’ve already announced cancellation of a major agricultural event in September.

The likelihood of horse racing events still going ahead in August is looking slim.

eazybee Fri 08-May-20 11:09:34

You are overthinking this; if restrictions are lifted and he wants to go you don't have to go with him; to me it reads as if you don't want to go therefore he must not, and if he does:
' I feel our relationship will suffer badly if we fall out over this'.

Your choice.
If you genuinely feel at risk, stay with your daughter for fourteen days and let him self-isolate, but do it pleasantly.

aggie Fri 08-May-20 10:56:59

It won’t be on , so worry for nothing , just keep saying “ yes dear “ in a sympathetic tone .

Alexa Fri 08-May-20 10:55:20

I think coronavirus will be here forever . If you have been vaccinated your husband is unlikely to infect you even if he's a carrier.

Also it's possible that by August many people will have acquired natural immunity and you and/or your husband may be be so lucky.

If you are neither naturally immune or vaccinated by August you would be wise not to go. When your husbamd returns from the races, can you occupy separate beds and not have sex or cuddles without risking your marriage?

midgey Fri 08-May-20 10:49:29

There are so many ifs and buts, do you really need to worry so much now? So many things might happen before then I think you should pop this worry into a bag and leave it until July!

Beau1958 Fri 08-May-20 10:45:34

Yes I could let him go on his own but he is risking catching it and bringing it home. I will by then be hopefully visiting my daughter and my two small grandchildren if I passed it on to her and she got it, it would be awful as she is a single parent.

Barmeyoldbat Fri 08-May-20 10:22:30

Just let him go on his own whatever happens with lockdown. At this stage it is not worth the worry about catching the virus.This virus will be lurking around for most of the year.

Luckygirl Fri 08-May-20 10:21:38

I agree. If you are concerned for your own safety, but the government lifts restrictions, then maybe he could go on his own. Personally I would not go.

Oopsadaisy3 Fri 08-May-20 10:19:24

I think if all restrictions are lifted then there is no problem about him going, let him go on his own, if you don’t want to go.
However, you are 62 and healthy so unless you stay away from people until there is a vaccine, you will be at home for a very long time.
So stop worrying, take the necessary precautions and try to have a fun.
Of course we might all still be in lockdown......

Beau1958 Fri 08-May-20 10:14:36

We had an argument about our holiday we have book to Southern Ireland in August. We booked this last year he is going to the races in Tremore with his friends then driving to Killarney to meet me for a week’s horse racing after. I told him I think we shouldn’t go if restrictions are lifted, he’s saying he will if he’s told he can. There will be a lot of people there not only from Ireland, the pubs will be very busy. I’m just hoping restrictions won’t be lifted and he can’t go. I just feel he’s being very selfish I’m 62 I’ve no underlying problems but I fear catching it. I feel like he’s putting himself first with no care about how I feel. This virus is not going away and I’m scared. I feel our relationship will suffer badly if we fall out over this.