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Coronavirus

Seems like I'm being left behind!

(111 Posts)
nananet01 Fri 19-Feb-21 12:53:36

Hi there, I'm surprised how I feel after my husband was vaccinated this morning. He is 67 and I am 63, so he has been called in. The letter from the NHS offered a booking online or the alternative, to wait until our gp surgery called him in. He was going to take the 2nd option as we'd hoped to go together. Then on the spur, he went online and booked. I am very happy for him, however I now feel out on a limb and my anxiety has increased because all of our friends have been vaccinated, now my husband has, and not me. I cannot understand why or how I am feeling like I am when I am so grateful he has had his jab. I know it won't be long until it's my turn, but until then I feel set apart from everyone. It's hard to put into words.

misty34 Sat 20-Feb-21 23:55:36

I do understand, in my area they are just starting 60-65 but also including 16- 65 with underlying conditions, a huge group!
I am 61 and have COPD a respiratory disease and all around me are younger people this week having jabs in 30=40's for obesity, diabetes or even pre- diabetes. i know we are all at risk and I feel selfish thinking because I am older that I deserve it first. I don't like myself for my reaction but I have not left house since March and struggle to breath doing daily activities so am terrified of Covid and younger neighbours and extended family members are going about their lives shopping etc and I feel aggrieved. I think it is because I thought I would be hot on the heels of the 65-69's and now feel I have no idea where I am in this queue, if that makes sense.

Hetty58 Sat 20-Feb-21 22:27:58

It all depends on area. For instance, in Enfield, they're doing the over 50s already.

The people who turn up on the off-chance aren't really queue jumping - just using up spare doses that would have to be thrown away otherwise. The Oxford one has to be used within six hours of opening. It makes no sense to discard it.

When I got my text 'invite' via the GP, I couldn't book online - only through the link on my mobile.

Of course, when I got back, after the jab - there was my invitation letter!

GrannyRose15 Sat 20-Feb-21 22:02:40

Boz

Just go in with him and ask to be vaccinated at the same time as you live in the same household etc. etc. They will not refuse.

I'm afraid they might - refuse that is. I tried this when my DH had his but was told I was too young. This when the centre we were at had capacity for 1500 per day but only had 500 booked in for the day we were there. Crazy really.

POBCOB Sat 20-Feb-21 21:37:53

I am 63 and was vaccinated today so don’t worry it will be your turn very soon.

Musicgirl Sat 20-Feb-21 21:09:00

I understand your feelings entirely. I wrote on the newly shielding thread about how l was disappointed and slightly irked that asthmatics whose symptoms were well controlled were being downgraded in favour of the morbidly obese (although l can, of course, understand why the latter group need the vaccine as soon as possible) because, even though I know there are a multitude of reasons for severe obesity, part of me still feels it is self inflicted. Even though my asthma is generally well controlled and I can understand that I am no more likely to die of covid than anyone else, l take a daily preventative inhaler with long acting reliever medication in it. I have also had several bad asthma attacks and chest infections in the past so I could be very poorly indeed if I caught it and so have been extremely careful. This would put me from group 6 down to group 8. However, it seems that the doctors have obviously been considering cases on their own merit and l had a call this morning asking me if I could have my vaccination on Thursday. I feel as if I have won a gold medal.

They are going through group 6 at the moment (16-65 with underlying medical conditions). Group 7 (60-65) and group 8 (55-60) will be the two largest groups of all. I read some time ago that the year I was born (1964; l was born in December) was the year when more people were born than any year since the end of the Second World War, over a million of us. I certainly remember that we always had large classes in school. Even allowing for the fact that some people will have emigrated and others, sadly, will have died, there are still a great many of us around. We are a ticking time bomb for the next twenty or thirty years as we age further and, despite the fact that we have been around for 55+ years, no prizes for guessing what preparation successive governments have put in place.

Justcallmeslave Sat 20-Feb-21 18:38:08

A great number of couples are in this situation- including myself and my spouse. I’ve had mine while he’s still waiting.
In my opinion, it’s better if you have them at different times because you may have a reaction to it like I did (and a few other people I know) I was glad OH was able to look after me which may not have been the case if he’d had his and had a similar reaction to myself!

Saetana Sat 20-Feb-21 18:26:17

You most certainly can go in with someone having a vaccine - my husband had his two weeks ago (mid fifties but extremely clinically vulnerable) and I went with him - you are allowed to take a carer with you and that is what I am, not that they asked other than to check whether I was due to be vaccinated that day or not. Didn't think to ask if I could have one as well - I'm group 9, early 50s with no serious health issues. Ah well, the South West are steaming ahead with the rollout so I expect to get mine by April at the latest.

Boz Sat 20-Feb-21 17:33:54

Marm
Dont ask for a slot because they are working "by the book". You need to walk in with someone who has a slot and trust they have extra vaccines. As you didn't go in with your DH this is now a bit difficult for you! But you are very near to having the jab anyway.
I got the impression it saved a lot of admin for them for you to piggyback an older partner. No letter for me. They take your NHS number and get it sorted. It's more efficient.

Mamardoit Sat 20-Feb-21 17:00:22

Boz

Just go in with him and ask to be vaccinated at the same time as you live in the same household etc. etc. They will not refuse.

Is this true?

It would account or so many people between 60 and 65 around me already having the vaccine.

They had vaccine slots locally and were asking for people to go in. I tried but couldn't get a slot because I'm under 65. DH had his with the 70+.

ExaltedWombat Sat 20-Feb-21 16:57:17

Yes, I know. It's NOT FAIR!

(Except that it is, actually.)

Have a nice cup of tea.

Luckylegs Sat 20-Feb-21 16:49:15

How strange, I’ve heard from several couples where the younger wife went along with the husband and just asked if they could have the jab as well and it was readily agreed. Probably a good idea as they share a house etc.

Silvertwigs Sat 20-Feb-21 15:47:41

Efficacy is the same for Pfizer and Ox/AZ in over 65’s?

Gwyneth Sat 20-Feb-21 15:32:58

They are vaccinating people according to age for a reason and if people who are younger are ‘jumping the queue’ this may well be depriving older people of their turn to be vaccinated. I actually don’t understand how someone could even consider doing it quite honestly.

Shropshirelass Sat 20-Feb-21 15:31:39

They are suddenly vaccinating our age group, my DH is younger than me but shielding, he was jabbed two weeks ago. I just waited, my friends were all being done (some younger than me) then last Tuesday the phone call came (I had received a letter to book at a centre if I wanted to but decided to go to my GP who were giving the Pfizer one) and my appointment at the surgery was the next day. All done, all fine now waiting for the second one in due course. Don’t worry, they will call you.

Magrithea Sat 20-Feb-21 15:29:15

My DH had his jab this morning, I'm not in the age bracket until later this year so have to wait but that's fine. Our turn will come!

Margiknot Sat 20-Feb-21 15:24:01

I have the opposite worry- my husband is in his early 60s so is waiting for his vaccine, whilst I have had mine. I know men are slightly more vulnerable ( and possibly less careful) so I worry about him. I’m sure your husband will be happier when you are vaccinated and safer too Nananet!

leeds22 Sat 20-Feb-21 15:04:19

I must have been lucky as I got my jab with 77 year old husband and I’m 4 years younger. But 72 year old friend in shielding category had to chase up the surgery and only got it on the last day for 70+. Currently our local gp consortium has no vaccines at all.

chattykathy Sat 20-Feb-21 15:03:49

Keep trying the link Ellianne!

Ellianne Sat 20-Feb-21 14:45:11

Well, it didn't work! My husband 60 had his this afternoon. I am 62 and I rocked up with him to ask if there were any chance. Nope, they're not doing under 65s yet.
(His only "condition" is an unexplained happening a couple of years back. I have far more!)
Oh well, patience, though I can understand how OP feels. A bit like the lonely wallflower in Peter Skellern!

chattykathy Sat 20-Feb-21 14:39:19

GPs have been asked to concentrate on the CEV so the NHS are working down the list of age groups. Go on this daily. www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/coronavirus-vaccination/book-coronavirus-vaccination/
I kept checking on this all week and last night it let me book my appointment. I'm 64 and I also had vaccine envy when DH had his last week. It will soon roll round OP

jocork Sat 20-Feb-21 13:49:13

Our GP surgery seems to be a bit ahead of some places, possibly because our infection numbers were very high, so when I got a text inviting me for mine I thought it was a hoax. It came from a company acting on the surgery's behalf and after googling the company was reassured so I booked. I had the jab 2 weeks ago and am only 66! The rates seem to vary from area to area and I suspect they are supplying more vaccine to areas with higher covid rates. It will also depend on uptake. I think it's very sad that some people aren't turning up for their appointments, maybe because they book online as well as with their local GP and then just go to the most convenient one. We will all get the vaccine eventually. I wasn't extecting to be done until at least March so it was just a pleasant surprise.

grandtanteJE65 Sat 20-Feb-21 12:49:59

Look at it this way: now your husband and most of your friends have been vaccinated, you are potentially safer than you were yesterday.

sunnybean60 Sat 20-Feb-21 12:15:35

I think as many have said it's been an emotional time for many. I found once I had my vaccination recently a great weight of fear and uncertainties lifted but by too bad felt envy of those who had been vaccinated and could see a path forward to regaining independence again.

GoldenAge Sat 20-Feb-21 12:14:29

nananet01 - you're experiencing existential anxiety and frankly, that's absolutely normal in the current situation. The only way to counteract it as to do what you've done, invite comment from others that will show you that you have a choice of how you respond. I think there are many couples in your position (my own husband is ten years my senior and therefore was offered a vaccination before me) and the older person often feels disloyal by accepting their entitlement while the younger has to wait a little longer, but your turn will come and it will be any day now.
As far as suggestions not to contact GPs go, I know from experience that here in London GPs and vaccination centres are encouraging people outside of the official groups being vaccinated to ring towards the end of the day to see if there is spare vaccine - an excellent idea to prevent wastage and actually get a broader spectrum of the population protected. So if you have the time and energy you can do that. Don't worry about the feeling, it's to be expected.

Ginpin Sat 20-Feb-21 11:42:13

My husband 65 was done this week here in Dorset.
I am 64 so not allowed.
Over on Mumsnet, it seems like in some counties those in their 20s are being vaccinated, eg west Sussex, no health conditions, really not fair !