ixion I would have loved to see the photo of you in Big Knickers and GFrench's warning card but alas, I can't see either. I don't mean you didn't post them, I'm sure you did but such things are just a blur now.
Doodle you are a dark horse aren't you? 
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I've had two relief (it was a relief when they left) workers (a misnomer for the 2nd one) since Aatoa was away.
The first, sent to do my kitche/bathrom cleaning and shopping was fine until I mentioned I needed to go up the road for fresh vegetables. 'Oh, I don't take people in my car.' she said. 
As I use a cash card with a secret PIN and didn't know this dame, I had to go without but t'was not the end of the world as I had frozen ones to tide me over.
She complained that she'd had to come all the way from Te Atatu, her usually work base and was quite cross about it.
The second woman, a grinning fool who talked incessantly and told me her life story within minutes of arriving, ran the shower for literally 2 seconds then squeezed Toilet Duck round the rim of the loo and that was how she 'cleaned' the bathroom. It must have taken all of 3 minutes.
My few dirty pots were held under cold running tap and put, still dirty as I later discovered, on the draining rack.
She seemed to clean the workbenches but I suspect just ran her hands a couple of inches above and prayed for a miracle as it was still sticky when I made a cuppa after she'd gone.
She peered at me from 6 inches away and asked 'Do you know Jesus?'
I'm not usually facetious about such things but was so tempted, after two hours of her boring, interminable self-absorbed monologue that I almost said, 'Yes. he's the bloke who walked across the Waitemata Harbour when he missed the Waiheke Ferry.'
She told me (not asked) she was going to come to my house every Sunday to take me to her church. Undaunted, I told her she wasn't.
I was actually quite unwell that day and it must have been obvious. I just wanted her to go so I could slink back to my bed.
I suppose she meant well and I was genuinely grateful that she offered to put me on her prayer list.
I am tempted to welcome Aatoa back on Wednesday with a fanfare of trumpets and perhaps Doodle in her cheerleading gear.
Doodle can you go into the bank's nearest branch and ask them for help with the forms? This is what I have to do in so many situations but always meet with help and kindness.
NN Oh yes, you are wise to be wary of us lot. You'll be wearing big knicks and ogling sexy men in no time and the wrath of Narrow-Minded will descend upon you! 
)
Back with my kaumatua today and we played a daft but comical game. On a piece of paper we each wrote a "What if....?" question, eg: "What if I wore big, frilly knickers? "
Folded, the paper was passed on several times.
Then on the reverse of the one we ended up with, we had to write an answer - not knowing the question inside the fold.
So today, for instance, "What if I wore big, frilly knickers?" the answer could be, "I'd be elected Prime Minister and meet the King."
The sillier the better - as you can tell .
Grandchildren find it fun too.
It's always good to have a bit of nonsense in your life.
That's huge Kaimoana!
I had to visit my bank last week. It's in Edinburgh so a long bus journey. I was immediately asked if I had an appointment. Since when did you require an appointment to move money from your own account?
I was seen and managed to pay a large bill. Do you know the recipient?
Yes I do.
I suggest you phone them to check it's not fraud. They seem obsessed with fraud.
I was glad I suppose
At last the tree surgeon came. He was in such an impossible position, on his phone, up a tree that I decided as a lame old woman I couldn't be a lot of help to him so I went out for most of the day.
Tomorrow a furniture valuer is coming. I have also talked to a man who organises the annual charity book fair and can take any books I want to part with. He says nothing will go to landfill.
How are Lobstars doing?
I decided not to go to the Waitangi Concert.
Had I been able get there without relying on the help of others, I would have loved to spend time in the kaumatua tent with my friends and good food for a while.
The official van could have collected me with the others, about 10am and come back after 5pm but I don't think I could have managed all that time on a plastic chair in a hot marquee, as my back is still a bit dodgy.
The music was not so loud this year but the Council had imposed stupid (and to my mind, dangerous) rules which probably kept a lot of people away.
There's no shade, no trees in the park so all the little ones would have to sit out, unprotected from the hot sun.
New rules prohibited 'portable shade' other than umbrellas.
Waipareira provide gazebos on the periphery, first aid, lost child tents as well as free water at several stations around the park but with so many people expected and the temps at 26 degrees, it's still hard to avoid that sun.
All Waipareira events are always smoke, alcohol, drug and vape free and this year, a bag search at all entrances is in place.
I had some friends drop by as they were stuck in snail traffic at the end of my road and decided to turn off and catch up. We haven't seen each other for many months. That was a lovely visit.
They could already tell parking (despite the big meadow set aside) was going to be an issue, so I suggested they might leave their car in my drive.
I shall be sorry to miss Stan Walker who should be taking the stage about now.
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