Would psychotherapy help?

I have recently been following Ayurvedic advice which recommends only organic food, eating a proper meal at lunch time, no snacks and a last light supper before 6pm.. the weight is coming off.. and I'm sleeping better and have more energy

although it might sound expensive only having organic food I actually buy less and don't have any ultra processed food or expensive snacks

This might not be completely related to the main topic, but here's what I can tell from experience: my son struggled with low self-esteem due to how he looked for a long time. He was never overweight to an extent that would've harmed his wellbeing, but he just wasn't pleased with how he looked and hated going out to buy new clothes... I think he was feeling really low during the final years of high school. We supported him in every way we knew, but in the end, it was he who decided to break the cycle, once and for all.

He did it by focusing on how his body "felt" after every meal or snack. If he felt like walking was suddenly difficult after a meal, then he made a note about that particular dish and whenever we had it for dinner again, he would get really careful not to overeat. He did the same with desserts, ice cream, cakes, etc., he basically ditched them for several months. He also avoided white bread, only had it for breakfast, and tried to have his last meal of the day before 7 PM. He noticed that helped him fall asleep on time and wake up rested.

He also began jogging around three times a week together with some basic exercises like a few sets of push-ups and pull-ups, and that was it! His mood took a hugely positive turn soon after he made these few changes to his lifestyle. He never stuck to a diet plan or read a book about losing weight, as far as I know. He just focused on how his body reacted and set a goal of feeling happy for a change. Then he just traced the potential steps of what would it take for him to stop feeling angry with himself all the time, and, as it turned out, he knew himself better than anyone else

If you've tried all the physical routes to lose weight and it's still an uphill battle, then yeah, maybe the issue is more psychological than physical. Addressing the underlying emotional issues could be a game-changer for you.

Therapy could be super helpful to identify triggers and find healthier coping mechanisms. My advice would be to go for it; talk to a counselor or a psychotherapist. It could help you a lot in understanding yourself better and finding sustainable ways to handle stress and emotional eating.

My girlfriend and I actually tried couples counseling in New York City to work through some relationship issues and stressors. We did therapies there, and it helped both of us feel better mentally.

For anyone with serious weight problems I would have thought that counselling or other therapy was essential, starting several months before the diet.

Weight gain, any weight gain, is the result of eating too much. Successful weight loss is made up of losing the weight and then keeping it off and I think, as the OP shows, too many people lose the weight and then revert back to the eating patterns that put it on after the weight loss.

I would have long thought that psychological support was necessary to adjust to a new attitude to food and in developing an eating pattern that is as enjoyable as the damaging one, so that the tempation to miseat has gone.

I do not think the diet you use to lose weight matters, just find one that you feel comfortable and workable.

There is a very good book called The Last Diet by Shahroo Izadi (also look her up on YouTube). She has a background in therapy and addiction counselling. She does not focus on diet, but on understanding yourself and your eating habits, building self-esteem, identifying ‘gateway foods’ that lead to over-eating (or less than ideal food choices). She is very encouraging, cheerful and positive. The book helped me a lot.

I believe it yo be an absolute fact - stress puts on weight!! Take the stress away and the pounds will ho with it!!

Childofthe60sI heard about the shortages at my recent private Endo appointment and even with a prescription for Saxenda I have to wait until my pharmacy can get the drug in.

Weight loss is such a difficult emotional issue. Having tried lots of diets and dropped away due to stress/life etc I'm now doing intermittent fasting - 16:8 . There are still good and bad days but it's so much easier to keep going with.
I also joined the Zoe Predict programme which is wonderful but it's a lot of money and my last chance saloon. It's worth reading about (Joinzoe.co.uk, lots of podcasts by Tim Spector, Christ Van Tulleken as mentioned above).
Mind over matter is hugely important to start off. I found listening to the podcasts helpful. There's also a really easy to read book called The Glucose Revolution by Jesse Inchauspe.
Calories are only one aspect and not the most importante.
Sorry - don't mean to go on but it's a subject close to my heart as I still have a stone and half to deal with after putting on 5 stone with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. Levothyroxine didn't help much, on other meds with it.
Good luck.
If nothing else, joining a weight loss club can be really helpful though I'm now managing on my own.

Georgesgran

I think Noom is an eating plan that attempts to analyze why their subscribers are overweight and tries to factor those reasons into the individual plan.
It would be interesting to hear how you get on bytheway.

I did try Noom for a few months. They send you encouraging messages to put you on the right track, telling you why you do what you do. It is quite interesting and there are real people to email if you need help.
I actually found MyFitnessPal was better, it's basically calorie counting but looks at the proportions of protein, carbohydrate, fibre and fats that you are eating. It's initially quite long-winded to use as you have to enter everything you eat, but most of us repeat what we eat fairly regularly so you can enter a whole meal in one go once it is set up.
When you've been using it for a while you can work out which foods are the best for you, keeping you full but limiting calories. It's very useful to give you an idea of portion control.

I have been doing Noom and so has my daughter. I would recommend it. It has lots of psychological help and also you get guides who are employed by Noom and whom you can message for support.

bytheway I feel your pain as you could have been me. The only thing that worked for me, after trying all sorts of diets and slimming groups, was Bright Line Eating. I read about it on here- out of curiosity I bought the book which is written by a neuroscientist, but very easy to read, and was just blown away by the science.
I started it just over three years ago and have been keeping off eight and a half stone for over two years. It has been life changing for me. There’s a website if you’re interested.

"That is very far from the truth" should have been a sentence earlier- sorry🙄

I think professional counseling can be extremely helpful. With difficult siblings and struggling with your self-esteem, I think you would definitely find it beneficial.
Getting insight into what you're feeling and strategies for coping with the pressures you're under could even help significantly with your weight problems without even addressing that directly with the counselor. Having said that, I'm sure they will also offer strategies for dealing with your struggles to maintain your weight at a level you're happy with.
In the UK, it's something we maybe don't tap into enough and some people may still think it's a sign of weakness to seek support. To recognise your struggles and look for help is both wise and an indication of your strength of purpose. That is very far from the truth though. I was helped greatly to see the truth about what was going on in my workplace and to make the (correct) decision to leave. Two of my family members have been greatly helped by counseling. An close in-law is a counselor and one of my children is considering training as a fully qualified counsellor as that aspect of his current job is what he enjoys most. All the best.

Until very recently I was on Ozempic, which had helped me lose a considerable amount of weight, when nothing else had. I would have definitely recommended it, however it's not available at the present time. I received it via the NHS as I'm diabetic, but it has been overprescribed worldwide to non diabetics, purely for weight loss purposes.

Once the stock issue has resolved, potentially next year, I would give it a try. My depression and anxiety wasn't really being dealt with adequately by antidepressants, until the weight loss really kicked in. It's amazing how much my self confidence improved and the the negative thoughts receded as the weight dropped. I've still a long way to go, and without the thing which helped me get where I am, but I'm determined to keep going. A year ago that determination wouldn't have been possible.

I've just put my name down to reserve a copy of "Utra Processed People" from my local library - there are 91 applications ahead of me, seeking to reserve this book! I think this shows just what a significant issue this is....

If you want to lose weight just replace the wheat, (bread, pastry, biscuits) & sweets with fruit and vegetables, any you like and as varied as possible. You will lose weight and feel healthier.

The ideal number of different fruits and vegetables a week is 30! But it does include whole grains (oats, barley, millet, etc.), nuts, garlic, etc which are normally eaten in small quantities and often you don't notice how many different ones you have eaten.

Try it! Good luck! .

I have had lots of help with my mental health. I still struggle and fall into the dark pit, but the good thing about getting help is you can give you markers to leave on that fall. The markers help you climb back up again.

A good psychotherapist will help you create the words to put on those markers that are specific to you.

One piece of advice re seeking help,as has been mentioned here, make sure your therapist is fully qualified. If that person doesn't suit you, leave and find someone who does.

Re the weight. That's also something I struggle with but don't feel it's right to give advice as it is such a very personal thing. I wish you well for the future. I believe it's never too late to help yourself have a happier life.

Hi there
I haven’t gone been through this but yes do have some help …You are important and you should enjoy life .Do let us know how You get on🙂🩵

Its very difficult I know. Lots of people struggle with this, especially women. There is a 12 step programme for compulsive overeating. It's a difficult thing to overcome/stop alone. You said you were a 'people pleaser' and very down on yourself. That would be a good place to start. Thoughts can hold a lot of power over us and there are lots of ways of changing our thoughts.Meditation can help. I think therapy would definitely help you understand the thoughts ,feelings and behaviours that lead you to compulsive eating.

Eating is an easy way to avoid difficult or painful feelings but as with anything we do to excess it can come back at us and be worse that the thing we were avoiding to begin with. It can become a habitual go to place in moments of stress. Be very gentle with yourself as you find your way out of this. Speak to people, get help. Good luck and lots of hugs.... and well done for reaching out.

Reading this article may help you with your decision making.

www.hgi.org.uk/resources/delve-our-extensive-library/case-histories/tipping-scales-hg-approach-weight-management

Thanks for all your helpful advice.

Calipso- I am currently reading Ultra Processed People, thing is (chocolate and cake aside) I cook everything from scratch so eating supermarket processed food is not something I do but am finding the book very interesting

ClareAB - I have a friend who had a gastric sleeve last year and has lost a tremendous amount of weight, every time I see her now I she appears vulnerable to me, probably because she is smaller and still eating very little. I’m not sure that’s a route I want to go down.

I had a chat with DH last night about my feelings and he said if I want to try Ozempic I should go ahead but in the meantime I have read a lot about the side effects which has rather put me off. He has also encouraged me down the psychotherapy route.

bytheway, do whatever you feel might help you be happier. Personally, though, I'd seriously question why you feel such a failure. Why is that? Ok, you are overweight. It's not a hanging crime.

You can simply choose to accept yourself just as you are. If I had a sick parent, judgemental siblings and an imminent house move on the horizon - I'd be diving into the chocolates too!

These days, I'm relaxed and laid back. Food is to be enjoyed - 'good' and 'bad'. It's only by sheer luck, genetics (and probably a vegan diet) that I'm not overweight.

My siblings are miserable, small minded, mean spirited, self-obsessed souls - plagued by health anxiety and insecurity. I only tolerate them as they are my siblings. They'll worry themselves to death as I enjoy my later years, it's such a crying shame.

Ps. Losing the weight, and having counselling has elevated my self-esteem to the point were eating my emotions is no longer necessary.
Plus, to be honest, even if I want to binge, physically I can't, so that also helps.

I get it. At 57 my weight had yo-yo'd between 14-18 stone for 30 years. I tried every slimming club and succeeded in losing a few stone only for it to creep back on, and some over the next couple of years.
As a MH professional, I know that many weight problems are rooted in psychological issues and it is important to try to identify and manage those issues for your own mental well being never mind the extra weight, but that is a very reductionist view as is the 'eat less, move more' mantra.
After reading Jenni Murry's book 'Fat Cow' where after a lifetime of battling weight issues, she decided on a gastric sleeve. It's an interesting read.
I read around the issues with weight control and was shocked about a couple of things.
Firstly, there is a 95% residivision rate in people who lose weight, plus they tend to put more on.
Secondly the hormone Ghrelin which is produced mainly in the stomach increases after dieting telling you are hungry because they want you to get back to the weight you were before dieting. So, you are literally fighting with your body all the time to try and maintain the weight loss.
Gastric bypass surgery is considered the gold standard of bariatric surgery, and people who have the surgery are found to have lower ghrelin levels than those who lose weight by diet and exercise.
I bit the bullet and had the bypass in March this year. It has been life-changing. It's not an easy step to take, but putting on a size 14 (US 10) jeans on, and not feeling like the fattest person in the room has been a revelation. Good luck.

cornergran

In my view it can never hurt to understand the ‘why’ of things. Some time to unpick underlying issues could help in all sorts of ways. If you seek therapy please work with some who not has experience of clients with low self esteem and comfort eating but also holds an accreditation with a professional body such as BACP. There are too many folk out there calling themselves counsellors who aren’t professionally qualified. Wishing you well.

Agreed.

Bear in mind that there are different kinds of counselling and psychotherapy.

If you aren't familiar with these start here
www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/talking-therapy-and-counselling/types-of-talking-therapy/

Very much what Cornergran says.

You might want to focus on food self esteem comfort eating only or the more"digging deep opening personal Pandoras box" to work on family stuff

And you can always go for an initial session to see if you "click and feel comfy with a counsellor or therapist as that usually makes it more effective.

You don't need psychotherapy.

Take a look at Chris Van Tulleken's book "Ultra-Processed People: Why Do We All Eat Stuff That Isn’t Food … and Why Can’t We Stop?" It's absolutely fascinating , I downloaded a sample on my Kindle and immediately bought the whole thing. Also worth taking a look at is Jason Fung's "Fat Fiction" (YouTube I think) which outlines how most of the advice we've ever been given about losing weight is total rubbish. It's such an eye opener. We don't have increasing levels of obesity because people suddenly have no willpower, its because so much stuff that's peddled in the supermarket as food isn't actually food.