Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

Thank you Allsorts it’s a minefield, isn’t it? My eldest DGC has just been to university and no doubt heard many varying options and perspectives there.

If Grandchildren seek you out just remember parents had to to justify why you were not in their lives, they love their parents, don't know us, so unless they can live with the fall out at home, it doesn't work. Your heart breaks all over again.

It was delicious with custard, I hope my apple tree bears more fruit next year.

It’s a new experìence eating food I’ve grown, even if it’s only part of the dish or meal.

Thank you Yogin Allsorts Whiff Smileless

Yogin if you go on holiday some hotels and air B&B' are dog friendly . So you and Joey could go together.

I have to book my room early at Premier inn as I need an accessible room. All Premier inns and Travelodges had accessible rooms for walking and wheelchair disabled. They are the only chain hotels to have them at every hotel. Other chain hotels don't. Private hotels hardly have them plus they charge £20-25 a night if you are on your own.

Whiff enjoy your lunch with your GN friends. Next weekend I'm meeting up with some friends I see about 3/4 times per year, we always have a lovely time catching up. Also going for lunch with my park friend the Thursday after.

Your very good booking all your holidays, I would like to go on more, but I hate the thought of leaving Joey.

Sparklygran How wonderful, your apple crumble looks good enough to eat with some lovely custard. I didn't get any apples from my tree this year, think it needs another fruit tree to pollinate with. I would like to get a crabapple tree as they have amazing flowers in spring, also I grew up on Crabtree Ave.

Allsorts as you get older your world shrinks. I remember always having about 12-14 for Xmas dinner, over the years it gets smaller and smaller. I'm lucky to always have Xmas dinner with my DD, GC & S. Pray that never changes. Not forgetting my little doggie of course.

Morning all

Your right Smiles about the lying as to why we are not in our GC lives, my s.i.l is the biggest liar on the planet!

I always insisted on a real tree at Xmas, loved the smell and going out to choose it. But last year I bought a really nice artificial tree, as like you Smiles moved to a smaller place. I was really pleased with it last year, it fitted in perfectly and no mess!

Joey is sitting on my lap as I type, so typing over him. Now and again he taps my arm down .

Enjoy your friends visit Smiles

Whiff this pad is ready for the bin, I check every sentence, read it back as a whole and there's many words changed, mainly to tiger or giraffe for some reason, also changes for to fir, so I change words again, press send and there again are mistakes.
Your crumble looks good Sparkly, I like mine with Cornish ice cream. I often make an individual one for myself. Like preserved ginger in too.b

Dam lost my post . Only ever happens on GN . To tired to start again. Had covid jab yesterday got a sore arm .
Have wonderful time with your friend Smiles and the dogs will have fun .

Sparkly crumble looks delicious hope you had custard with it .

Whiff thank you for your kind advice. I am hoping I’m not hurt again or badly.

Garden centre - Smileless plant rescue centre I’ve decided to call mine in my area.

Thank you, both.

My apple tree gave me 43 apples and this is my first crumble I’ve made from them;

Have a lovely weekend Smileless with your friend and her dog. The western gas been wonderful this last week.
Whiff, the older children get the more challenging to buy for.
Now mind are much older it's cash as things I bought, were frequently changed, although I always checked first.
I am only havinga small tree, doubtful if it's more than me that sees it. However, had wonderful Christmas all my life abd it was bound to happen, don't take it for granted but usually go to my son and dil for dinner as try have pets and children that frequently have their friends popping in which I love to see too.

Morning everyone.

Well Sparkly doesn't this just highlight that some EAC know they had no justification to estrange their parents and deny their children those GP's which is why they lie.

I hope that our GS's never seek me out. I wouldn't want to be confronted with two young men and the stark reality of what we were so cruelly denied.

We went to our nearest garden centre yesterday which always has the most amazing Christmas section. It's huge and takes a couple of months to set up for October 1st.

This year they've excelled themselves and a long entrance replicates Narnia with beautifully lit trees and a lit lamp post.
We just love the run up to Christmas which never ceases to amaze me bearing in mind it was Christmas Eve, 14 years ago that we were estranged so have never experienced this time of year with GC .

We're going to get a metal frame which attaches to either end of the dining table and decorate it with all things Christmas as I haven't decided what to do about a Christmas tree yet.

So many beautiful things to tempt but not having nearly as much room as we used to have, I have to be content with looking rather than buying which suits Mr. S. .

I did buy a white poodle tree decoration, not for the tree but in memory of little Pip which will of course be out all year round. Mr. S. did make me laugh when he said "it looks nothing like him" to which I replied it's white and it's a poodle!!!

Little Ziggy is in to everything so we may settle for the small tree we have which we can put on a table so it's out of reach and not use our beautiful glass baubles just in case but at least we'll have the sizeable table decoration if not.

You're certainly organised with your holidays Whiff. Our only plans so far are to go to Hadrian's wall which we had to cancel this year because Poppy was so unsettled without her brother.

My dearest friend is coming on Saturday for a few days and is really looking forward to meeting our new addition so we'll have 3 dogs to control while she's here. Her Cockapoo loves to play which Poppy's never been in to so I think she'll be rather pleased with Ziggy.

Poppy does play with him which she'd never done before so you never know, Dolly may get a pleasant surprise if she wants to play with her too.

SparklyGrandma I imagine my son and daughter in law have told my grandsons thats if the 2 eldest remember me either I am dead or don't want to see them. My eldest grandson was 10 this week he's brother's are 8 and 6. Last time I saw the eldest 2 they where 4&2 . Don't know the name of date of birth of their brother as he was due in July 2020.

To be honest if my grandsons do want to find me they will but I am 68 now not intending to die anytime soon . Whether they bother when they are adults is up to them. But they will know the truth about their parents and I won't hold back .

Decided 3 years ago never want to see or hear from my son ever again . We are strangers . I am not the mom he knew and he is not the man I knew. I still love him but the son I had for 32 years not the son aged 39 now.

I am lucky have my daughter, son in law and 2 grandsons 8 and nearly 6.

This week put away the 8 photos of my sons boys in a cupboard along with rest of photos . And filled the frame with photos if my great nephew who was born begining of April. I will never see him in the flesh as I will never go back to the black country and doubt my niece and family will visit. They have a dog. While ok when my brother and sister in law stayed and brought their Jack Russell that was fine Aggie is lovely. I don't know my nieces dog and its a medium sized mongrel.

I hope you get your wish and your eldest granddaughter does find you but be careful if she does . You don't know what ammunition your son has instilled into his children to hurt you and please don't give her any money. I know its your choice but it may be they only thing they get in touch with you. Also hoping to be in your will. Life has taught me to be careful of other's motives and money is usually the root of what people want .

I cut my son out of my will in 2020 and left nothing to my grandsons. My husband and I believed children inherit from their parents and up to their parents if they want to give the chikdren anything.

After my husband died both the chikdren said they don't want any inheritance and to spend money on myself . I am proud of both couples they rented and saved to buy their own homes ,cars and paid for their own weddings with no help from me .
May sound old fashioned but thats the way it should be . Phrase I hated is bank of mom and dad. If children and grandchildren want something them they need to save for it. We did and went without luxuries and had camping hols .

My hols all over for the year. But booked for Aberystwyth in May and Oban in September next year. Hopefully go to see my brother and sister in law in July as usual and already decided to go somewhere in August haven't decided where yet.

My week is its normal sit fit Monday ,move it or lose it Tuesday. Wednesday night choir we are learning Eleanor Rigby, Love story,We built this city and Elastic heart. Cleaner comes on Thursday's. I went with a care company that way I know someone will come every Thursday. But included activities into it . Today no cleaning. I sorted out some old cross stitch magazines all 136 of them tied those in year order and checked with the hospice shop they are going to price them . Plus all the special cross stitch magazines. I know what cross stitchers will pay for charts and how much they cost in the first place. I don't knock things about so they are in good condition. Ranging fro 2016 to 2020. If its not raining go to the beach and if time go for a hot drink and treat on me. I have my cleaner for 90 mins .

So far my daughter is having problems getting the boys to say what they want for Christmas. She did say they needed new aprons for when they cook and back . I have always brought them . Had them specially made because they are both tall and skinny the 8 year old is my height 5' 1". He's brother is cleavage high on me.

Back to 3 from GN monthly lunch club as we call it as one has been ill so only 2 of us last 3 months . But out on the 30th table all booked.

Any way better post and read what I have missed . Will be back but this has taken me 90 mins to write .

Afternoon everyone,

Anyone doing anything new and interesting as the new school starts?

Evening or day class for instance?

Turns out my EstDS has been telling my DGS porkies about why they don’t see me. (He’s prevented them seeing me).

Like I’m detained, in prison or some such. Two of my DGDs are adults now, if he has done that, he’ll have to dig himself out.

I hope and pray (hard) that my eldest DGD keeps pushing and finds me.

Morning all

Ziggy sounds adorable Smiles, I see many puppies in the park with their big fluffy new coats. Hope you and Mr.S continue to feel well after your jabs.

I remember when I first got Joey and put him in for his first haircut. I couldn't believe it was Joey when I picked him up after his groom, he looked so different and gorgeous. I bathed and cut Joey's hair myself this last week; head and tail first, next day body and legs, yet to do his toenails. Must say he is looking really good.

Went to the Colchester Abortorium on Tuesday with my son Glenn, had such a good day out.

Need to get out earlier today as having my waterpipes changed to copper.

Take care all

Afternoon all, hope you've all had a good week.

Ziggy had his second groom on Wednesday and I asked her to clip him the way she used to do Pip. I think she was a bit surprised as his puppy coat was so lovely, but it was too long and thick, and he looked more like a teddy bear than a poodle.

When we went to collect them both she asked if we were ready for a complete transformation and she wasn't wrong; he looks fabulous and as we suspected, tiny without all that fur.

He has the most adorable little face which was hard to see with all that fur. I'll get Mr. S. to put on a pic so you can see how much he's changed.

A friend has collected her 12 week Chihuahua puppy today and at 2.6 kg he's actually bigger than Ziggy!!!

We had our flu jabs this morning and so far so good. We've never had a reaction to them before so fingers crossed we wont this time either. Mr. S. was rather pleased that this time he's not old enough for the Covid vaccine; bless.

Have a good weekend everyone; I hope the weather is as lovely for you as it is for us today.

Morning everyone.

Hope you enjoyed your time in Dundee Whiff.

I could do with a sudden burst of energy Allsorts. If you've any going spare perhaps you could pass some on.

Literally slept Monday and Tuesday away this week as I had a horrible head cold. Feeling much better now but still not a 100% but it's been a while since I was TBH.

A lot of our garden plants seem to have a new lease of life Sparkly. The sun daisies are the best they've been all year and one of our hanging baskets with petunias that Mr. S. did in the spring, is still in full bloom and our rose bush is flowering again.

Going to our flat today to collect any post and then do some shopping in town. Really need to give it a freshen up as we've not used it yet this year. We're thinking of going for a couple of nights in November now little Ziggy's toilet training is under control.

Have a good day everyone.

Cleaned house from top to bottom, tweaked it with a few Autumn touches and today the outside gets tidied. Because of the excessive heat this year have not done any of the usual maintenance do as it needs a lick of paints in places etc but it will have to wait. Getting car serviced Tuesday ready for Autumn and winter. Don't know where this sudden burts of energy has come from. decided I am getting train somewhere interesting tomorrow and treat myself. Have good day everyone and safe journey home Whiff.

Morning friends, I have a glut of courgettes. I’ve made courgettes and pasta, courgette curry, ratatouille, etc. Has anyone frozen courgettes before? Maybe slices frozen first on a big tray then when frozen, store them in a container in the freezer?

Autumn is really kicking in here, the cooler air making itself felt at the beginning and end of the day. My roses cosmos and pelargoniums are putting on a show, as if the summers drought and heat was like a winter and they think it’s spring?

My little apple tree gave me 41 gorgeous apples this month. Another 8 were too blemished to eat and are now in the long grass for the bees and wasps to feast on.

I gave some away to neighbours for them to make crumbles.

My tree is a James Grieve on dwarf stock. Only tiny but in its third year a good producer.

My cats are putting on their winter fur now, eating a bit more as a result. Their fur is shiny and new.

Logo on front of my tee shirt. Can't help it love singing . We have a what's app group and its busy . Like here strangers that became friends. Just we see eachother.

Thank you I am looking forward to Dundee up at 4 in the morning . Taxi isn't coming until 6 but takes time for my body to work plus my thrice checking my luggage. Drive myself mad but its part of my routine.
Allsorts should have warned those on the trains 🤣. I have meet the most interesting people on trains . I have found people who use trains are very helpful even in London.

Yesterday booked my week in Oban in September next year. Only had 3 accessible rooms left so glad its all booked. Always pay more for Flexi rate as you can cancel up to 1pm the day you arrive and get a full refund. Have the meal deal and early check in.

Sunflower ,Sparkly is beautiful my daughters has just come into bloom . Still lots of flowers of all sorts open. I have a poppy about to bloom. Wood pigeons have eaten all the berries some of my plants produce.

Sparkly lovely memory to have. What our estranged children don't realise is they have lost family history. My 2 grandsons love hearing stories of their great great and great grandparents and other family members. But more importantly they have lost history of family health problems. My dad after his 2 heart attacks in 1995 medication helped but last 2 years of his life his heart was failing and died while mom slept beside him of massive heart attack. But dad had wanted to die he hated he became this weak frail man . He used to hit his chest and say this is not me.
There is a history of heart problems my brother has permanent atrial fibrillation, had angina and 2 TIAs.

I have hole in the side of my heart and paroxymal atrial fibrillation and my cardiologist and neurologist both said I had a TIA January last year . Stroke neurologist the idiot said was a migraine. My son knew when he sent the email I was waiting for tests on my heart as they found a problem after an echocardigram. So when asked if there is any heart problems he will either say no or don't know. Which could put his health and my 3 grandsons at risk. Plus his dads health problems. He knows about my HPX as I text time when I had my diagnosis in 2022 and told him I had sent a copy letter from my neurologist and how to get tested if he wanted. Told him do not send it back unopened. Luckily the gene mutation I have means I am have it but not a carrier but didn't know that at the time I sent him the letter . If I had I wouldn't have told him.

Our children think by estranging us they are free from us . But they forget what our grandchildren have lost . And if they develop heath problems as they get older they have no frame of reference where they came from . In my family there is a history of various health problems which has skipped some generations. Plus his dad's side of the family both my husbands parents had heart problems and other problems.

Estrangement isn't just getting rid of us and other family members but so much more they never even consider.

Sparkly, it is poignant remembering those special moments with grandchildren, it’s very hard not having any more. However, it wasn't your decision and nothing can be done.
Whiff, you look very professional in your Tee. Have a wonderful time in Dundee, as usual I have warned them you are coming.😂
Yoga i exchanged my Duvet too, from 4.5 to 10, I am baking under it but the other is cleaned and put away so its not coming out again.
Started to watch Strictly again, though every year I say I won’t because of a couple of squealing judges.

Whiff - Wimbledon Common - that reminded me of us going with my son’s furry stuffed Womble, up to Wimbledon Common, hiding the Womble behind a nearby tree and gently letting him find it.
He would be surprised, even though it was his furry Womble.

Remembered moments are sweetly poignant and stings the eye, of one’s little one, now estranged.

Thanks for pic Whiff, enjoy your trip to Dundee.

Hope little Ziggy is behaving himself and getting on with Poppy. Like you Smiles nothing much to say today, so just checking in.

Have a nice day all xx