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Everyday Ageism

Old lady hands

(79 Posts)
Riversidegirl Wed 15-Apr-26 16:44:59

There was a mention in last Saturday's Guardian letter page about not knowing Old Lady's Hands was an insult. I had not seen the original item, but now feel more conspicuous! Mine were brown spotty with years of pram and pushchair pushing, and are now worse with the thinner skin. I have used the Number 7 concealer but it can come off on clothes . Do people really look at your hands?

petra Thu 16-Apr-26 08:48:33

At a certain age you should count yourself lucky that the sight of your hands is the only thing that frightens the children and horses 🤦🏼‍♀️

FriedGreenTomatoes2 Thu 16-Apr-26 08:52:31

My hands and nails are nice I’m told. I’m often complimented.
My fingers don’t have lumps or bumps from arthritis.
My nails are strong but I keep them very short and neat. I don’t like to see long nails (talons) on old hand.

But even if they weren’t nice would I be ‘ bovvered’?
Nope.
As long as they stay pain free im happy.

At 71 I have a couple of liver spots (natch) and the skin on the back of my hands isn’t elastic anymore. My granddaughter L’il Miss giggles when she gives the skin a slight pinch and sees how long it takes to return he!

Yes hands (and elbows, ladies) show our age but 🤷‍♀️
It’s good to be lucky enough to still be here with them.

GrannyGravy13 Thu 16-Apr-26 09:26:22

I haven’t got a problem with my hands, they are the hands of a 68yr old.

These hands have raised our children, wiped their noses (and other parts) cleaned football boots and ballet shoes, mucked out stables and poo picked fields.

Along with working, travelling and yes horror of horrors laid in the sun…

posset Thu 16-Apr-26 13:43:57

GrannyGravy13

I haven’t got a problem with my hands, they are the hands of a 68yr old.

These hands have raised our children, wiped their noses (and other parts) cleaned football boots and ballet shoes, mucked out stables and poo picked fields.

Along with working, travelling and yes horror of horrors laid in the sun…

Your hands look like mine - but your nails look a damn sight better!

Sapphire1 Thu 16-Apr-26 13:52:43

I think after years of worrying about how I looked in a swimsuit/bikini, then shorts, then short-sleeved tops and dresses, I'm not going to worry about my hands. I would like them to look nicer but I don't have anything medically wrong with them, only a few age spots and try to keep them reasonable - medium length nails, clear nail polish etc. I've got to 68 worrying about things that really shouldn't have mattered, so I think now I'm lucky to be alive with few problems. I'm going to enjoy the time I have left and not worry about someone not liking my hands!

Mirren Thu 16-Apr-26 13:53:43

My 70 year old hands work well.
Yes , they're wrinkly and my nails are awful...but they always have been. I don't bother with varnish etc as I garden.
However, I am very blessed so far that I have avoided developing arthritis like many friends.
I can still sew , knit etc and I do not care what anyone thinks of my hands.
They are beautiful in their functionality.

BrandyGran Thu 16-Apr-26 13:57:31

Yes my hands are wrinkly and my nails split but I tell my grandchildren that I am proud of my hands for all the work they have done over 80 + yrs - sewing , knitting , crocheting , gardening, cleaning , washing up etc.
Don’t be one bit worried what people think- be proud of your hands!

pably15 Thu 16-Apr-26 14:03:40

the knuckles on my hands don't always work due to arthritis, skin is wrinkled and blue viens showing, but not much I can do about it, I'm over 80 now so hand are the least of my worries.

liftoffplatform Thu 16-Apr-26 14:05:09

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Astitchintime Thu 16-Apr-26 14:07:21

I have always had what are so called ‘old persons hands’ (men get old too!!!) right from being very young! My knuckle joints are deforming from injuries sustained over the decades and my veins have always been very close to my skin.
I find people judging others on their hands to be very degrading, rude, and uncalled for!

Astitchintime Thu 16-Apr-26 14:08:14

liftoffplatform

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Mary59nana Thu 16-Apr-26 14:08:16

I have Rheumatoid and my hands are the result of 27yrs of pain but I have my nails done and moisturise daily and last thing st night with No7.
I don't care what others think of my hand or neck im 66 andcstill alive and enjoying

FranP Thu 16-Apr-26 14:12:16

My hands have been veiny and wrinkled since my youth. Dad would fill the sink with hot soapy water, and use 2 girls would be given the job of washing the dishes. My sister would immediately grab the drying cloth, so my hands went into the hot water. Gardening did not help either.

Elkiee Thu 16-Apr-26 14:12:30

My young granddaughter once told me “you’ve got lovely nails but ugly hands”! I was about 60 and been conscious ever since. No amount of cream makes any difference!

rowyn Thu 16-Apr-26 14:25:50

I now understand that when I was a child, why my mother spent ages looking after her hands - and had very white smooth hands as a result. She mixed up a recipe of ingredients and used every day. Now I wish I'd got a copy of the recipe!!

But, now I've very little s strength in my hands these days, plus thin skin with blue veins showing, and have groceries delivered weekly, partly because I can then ask the driver to loosen all the bottle tops - or similar!
If I could choose just one thing it would be to still have strength , as I live on my own and it's extremely frustrating when I can't get a bottle open.; Just today, as I have a door leading from my kitchen into my garage, which is fitted with two strong locks, and today I couldn't open it, even though I spray WD 40 onto the locks quite regularly. VERY luckily my daughter and family are coming tomorrow on their way home , which is a long way away - up in the North whilst I live in the South East.

Colls Thu 16-Apr-26 15:04:19

Well said.

Jaxjacky Thu 16-Apr-26 15:06:33

Are there old men’s hands too, old lady ears or other more visible body parts?
Never heard of this before and it’s never occurred to me what my hands look like, apart from keeping my nails clean and tidy.

NannyC1 Thu 16-Apr-26 15:20:28

I look at my hands and think Damm you've worked hard all your adult life and I'm fine with the prominent veins, thin skin and liver spots and my arthritic fingers. I took a beautiful photo of my hand next to my 8 yr old GD hand in black and white. I'm going to get it printed off and put it in a frame for her birthday. Xx

labazs Thu 16-Apr-26 15:23:26

My hands do have a few spots etc and I am 62 years young. However, my hands at the least have held my babies, saved my late husbands life literally, created lovely things, held my dying mothers hand, comforted my father after losing mum hugging him and eventually hold his hand as he left this life, stroking my pets especially my darling Patch i lost recently who broke my heart and more

Alison333 Thu 16-Apr-26 15:27:49

Elrel

I have had prominent blue veins on the backs of my hands since I was about 40. A child asked why I had ‘worms’ on my hands!

Exactly the same happened to me!

FriedGreenTomatoes2 Thu 16-Apr-26 15:41:21

I’ve just had a manicure this afternoon 😊

4allweknow Thu 16-Apr-26 15:44:54

As long as they work, I could not care what they look like or what anyone else thinks of them. .

Dodo43 Thu 16-Apr-26 16:09:47

I knew someone who was born with no hands or arms, so worrying about something as superficial as how my hands look or what other people think of them is not something I waste time on. I thank God daily for a pair of hands that work.

crazyH Thu 16-Apr-26 16:22:45

FGT - they look lovely - reminds me, got to paint my nails

Allira Thu 16-Apr-26 16:28:56

BrandyGran

Yes my hands are wrinkly and my nails split but I tell my grandchildren that I am proud of my hands for all the work they have done over 80 + yrs - sewing , knitting , crocheting , gardening, cleaning , washing up etc.
Don’t be one bit worried what people think- be proud of your hands!

Yes, I was going to post exactly the same!
Sanded, painted, played piano
Cooking, chopping, they've got cut, scalded, burnt on occasion too!
I just wish I had good, strong nails.

Dodo43 👏👏👏

And applauded too!