Christmas Dinner

JessM, evidently I did the right thing! Mind you, one of mine is a trained chef who doesn't share his kitchen gladly!

In the almost 42 years we've been married, I (with some help from my husband) have cooked the Christmas dinner on nearly all of those years. I would love love love for someone else to have full responsibility for Christmas dinner - it's so exhausting.

If we have known of people on their own at Christmas, we have invited them. Our first married Christmas, my husband went down to the pub with my dad and invited back for Christmas a patient from the local psychiatric hospital. She enjoyed the meal very much, even though we all had plates perched on our knees because we didn't have a dining table. For several years we invited a neighbour and his son. My mum disapproved as our neighbour was very eccentric and less than fastidious about personal hygiene. More recently, I used to invite an elderly friend of mine as she absolutely dreaded Christmas because both her sons were living abroad. Now she's gone out to live in Canada to live near one of them. So, we're back to just the family again.

I love the family all together and am truly thankful that I'm not, like many people, alone at Christmas - but I am a little weary of doing the dinner.

My Christmas Dinner this year will be prawns and some exotic fish on the barbeque with lots of salads and cold meats, preceded by a visit to the beach for a swim - to heck with a dried out turkey and a game of Monopoly
.......but, I always return home feeling I have missed out on a 'proper' Christmas. Christmas isn't Christmas without frost or snow, carol singing in a candle lit church, present opening round a real pine tree and the cook swearing about an overcooked bird or an undercooked Brussels sprout!

When i go to SILs I take charge of the veg prep and boss the men around on xmas morning. (SILs' go off to church etc)
They come back and I back away rapidly.
They always do at least two starters for some unaccountable reason (no-one then wants any dessert as the starters are a normal-sized lunch...)
So my advice is don't get drawn into starters. and yes, delegate veg, table and washing up. And maybe serving up, which is a job i hate (getting ratty by then)
My mother once dropped a half-cooked goose on the kitchen floor - have you seen the amount of fat that comes out of a goose.... a tidal wave of the darn stuff. My sons once grilled a goose (an expensive "organic" goose) by turning on the wrong oven setting and then adjourning to brighton beach to watch the swimmers. We returned to the smell of singed goose, not roasting goose. Still, the lads pulled the thing together in the end. Several times they announced "I will do the roast potatoes" - then started doing them and went to pub.
But my best advice is bring up some sons so they kick you out of your kitchen an insist on doing the whole thing

My sister cousin and I were woken up on Christmas morning by firemen standing by the bed. The fire in the grate had burned down into the cellar and the whole cellar was on fire. I was only 7 and would probably have been more impressed by a fireman in my bedroom had I been 15 or 16

Things got a bit dodgy last year when I succumbed to norovirus the weekend before Christmas. My son (ex chef) was ready to come over on Christmas morning and organise the meal, but fortunately I had recovered by then and even more fortunately DH didn't catch it in spite of his damaged immune system.

We had Christmas on our own a few years ago and I hated it. We were supposed to be staying with DD2 and her family but she went down with Swine 'Flu, my mother had a urine infection and the kennels where I normally send our dogs had lost our booking!

DH tried his best to cheer me up with a lovely breakfast in bed but I missed everyone so much.

I woke up on Boxing Day thinking, Thank God that's over.

Sounds like a New Year I particularly enjoyed. DH and I had been invited to frieds near Kingston and I hate all that forced "Should Auld Acquaintance" jollity but hadn't been abe to come up with a good enough excuse. Just before we were due to leave I looked out of the window and saw thick fog!! So we took a bottle to bed with us (no not a hot water one) and watched The Manchurian Candidate and it was great!!
Still had a hangover the next day though

I remember actually enjoying my first Christmas alone after I got divorced. My son was at his father's (and new wife's.) I had been invited out elsewhere but didn't feel that sociable so after a pleasantly unhurried day I went to bed early with a bottle of wine, a box of chocolates and a good film. A concerned friend phoned to ask how I was and upon hearing the above was quite jealous as her mother-in-law and daughter were currently yelling at each other. I have since acquired another husband and the usual Christmas catering duties but I often remember that one quite fondly.

DSIL will not be home from work until after 10.00pm on Christmas Eve and will be back at work by 3.30am on Boxing day, here the big meal is usually eaten on Christmas Eve but not possible with us. DSIL will not have any alchohol after 3.30pm on Christmas day.New years timings will be the same. No turkey as my Uncle owned a turkey farm so ate it a lot as a child, and I can't stand the stuff now, only eat it in a curry.
So I have no idea yet what we will be eating, but i have a leg of lamb in the freezer.

I have cut the meal down to basics, turkey, ham, stuffing, sprouts, roast potatoes and gravy, no other veg, bread sauce or anything fancy. I then prepare the whole meal, bar actual cooking, on Christmas Eve, starting at 3.00 so that I can listen to the service of nine readings and carols form Kings College. the turkey gets put in the oven on the delayed timer so that it can start cooking without me worrying about remembering to do it.

Nevertheless even this planning can still end in disaster. One year when PiL were alive I prepared the turkey in the morning as DH went off to collect his parents, who didn't drive and they arrived earl afternoon. When I defrosted the turkey I thought the skin was slimy and it smelt, but DH said I was worrying unnecessarily and it was OK. As there was no room in the fridge and it was cold I put it in the garden shed to keep cool. PiL arrived, MiL went out to inspect the turkey and came flying back, it stank to high heaven and had blow fly.

It was 3.00 on Christmas Eve in the mid 1970s. DH and I put turkey in boot and drove immediately to shop where we had bought it. DMiL walked straight to local butcher, he had no turkeys left but she bought a pair of pheasants. The shop was mortified, they had bought one batch of frozen turkeys that were not from the usual supplier and mine was the fourth brought back. They were in the process of closing when we arrived and had one uncollected turkey left, which they gave us.

We then had to defrost the turkey fast. It involved up ending in a bucket and regularly pouring very hot water around it and inside it. We succeeded in defrosting it thoroughly in three hours and Christmas lunch then went on as usual. We ate the pheasants on Boxing Day.

BREAD SAUCE: come out from behind the sofa NOW!!! mine has no chopped onion but is made with onion and clove steeped milk, a bay leaf thrown in for good measure, bread (of course) black pepper,nutmeg, cream and butter stirred in at the end. Love it, love the smell when it is cooking, it is the smell of Christmas for me.

Tiggy, the girlfriend story, my youngest DDS brought a newish girlfriend home for Christmas. After dinner my DDH suggested that all the youngsters washed up and dried up. They all disappeared into the kitchen except Alice, Alice sat on her bum and refused to move. My son came and beckoned for her to come into the kitchen and help - her reply was 'In my house we never wash up we have servants to do that!!!' My son answered ' In THIS house there are no servants and you will help' She did go into the kitchen but stood sulking by the doorway. He finished with her that night.

Her family lived on an island off the coast of Jamaica. They owned a large Colonial house and had black servants to run around after them. Thank goodness she did not become a member of our family.

Last year I did the M&S Christmas dinner, four of us shared the cost and it was glorious. Loads of vegetables, roasties, mash, beautiful free range turkey crown, bread sauce (although I still made my gallons of the stuff) 2 x puddings, lots of extras.

It can certainly cause trouble. There have only been 2 years when I haven't cooked. The first when my womanising B.i.L wife finally came to her senses and left. We went to spend it with him. When I told my son and his wife my stupid son blurted out but what about dinner when his new wife said don't be silly ill cook it. He replied but what about the gravy! I'm sure there were a few words when I left. She was upset bless her, so much so she came to see me to ask how to make gravy. I gave her instruction and she told me she was afraid it would be lumpy so I told her to either buy a carton of gravy or use her usual instant and add a tablespoon of port and he'd never know the difference and he didn't. Last year we went to our other sons and it was a disaster. She has a bit of O.C.D with regard to housework and just couldn't cope. This year we are at home there will be 5 adults & 3 teenagers and 3 under 4's so it's turkey, ham trimmings for us nice and simple. Lots of noise. I do think we all have unattainable expectations. I find the shopping exhausting.

A few years ago we bought a small house now we simply don't have room for our ever growing family. My eldest daughter cooks for everyone although I cook the turkey. It works fine for me. :-)

I don't want anyone doing anything for me nanapug until I (or DH ) can't do it and I live in dread of being properly old.

When I was a child, our local baker used to cook turkeys at Christmas. Dad would take it down early in the morning and fetch it, beautifully cooked at about 1 o'clock.Heaven!Bring back the old ways, are there any local bakers left?
I've been cooking turkeys a la Delia for the last hundreds of years, so it seems.DH ordered ours this morning, so it looks like a repeat performance this year.Happy cooking all!

Being too good at it Nanapug!!!!!
Cultivate helplessness, burn the turkey, drop the sprouts, hang the wallpaper upside down, swap over the hot and cold taps - they'll soon get the message!!

I certainly feel part of the sandwich generation. I cooked Christmas Lunch for my mother and MIL for many years, and now do it for my DDs and their families. Am still waiting to have someone else cook for me but think I will be waiting a long time. We also used to help parents with decorating and general plumbing things etc and now help DDs with things like that, and yet again still waiting for someone to help us. Feel we will have a long wait for that too. Where did we go wrong?

Sounds heavenly ffinnochio Can we swap?

As we won't have any family around this year, and if it's not tipping it down, Mr. Ffinn and I will pack a tasty picnic and take it to the shoreline.

Not having had children Christmas lunch (more like dinner by the time it is ready) has never been stressful for me. Christmas morning DH would cook breakfast, then later we would go to the local pub until around 1.00, in the meantime the turkey would be in the oven (if I hadn't cooked it the night before). When we got back from the pub it would just be a question of cooking the veggies (bread sauce was banned as I consider it to be the work of the devil!). Always opened a bottle of wine while the veggies were cooking.

The most stressful Christmas lunch I had was whilst in the pub a couple of people said they were on their own for Christmas so DH invited them back to ours - I just threw in a few extra roast potatoes.

Since DH died I have spent Christmas with my family in Australia which was lovely but I spent last year alone and have to say apart from a few tears first thing it was fine. I have had a few invites this year but am staying home again.

Christmas lunch is always exhaustingvery hectic in my house. The family always come to me for dinner and DH does a kind of relay picking everyone up although I insist on taxis home. We eventually sit down to dinner at about 5pm (much to my grandmas disgust) after much chatter and exchange of presents. My DH and I do everything. It is the one day a year that I actually use my dishwasher ! My house is a three story town house and the kitchen and dining room are on the ground floor and the lounge is on the first floor. Last year my DH and I had to carry my grandma upstairs after dinner. This year we will have to carry my mum up too. Blimey, not sure how that's going to work!

We have Christmas dinner in turn at my house, DD2 and DS. DD1 lives at the other end of the country, and spends Christmas with the other inlaws, so her contact is by phone. This year it will be at DS. DiL will probably cook a couple of kosher chickens, as kosher turkeys seem to be in short supply. Actually, kosher meat of all kinds is as rare in Edinburgh as the proverbial pork chop in a synagogue, and previous Christmas birds have come from Glasgow or Manchester. She does a mean Christmas lunch, with the trimmings, despite not sharing the religious aspects of the day.

When it is here, everyone seems to be in my kitchen (drinks in hand) so they end up doing something! They ask beforehand if they can bring anything, so DD2 usually brings her famed trifle. She now makes two, one alcoholic and one not, as DiL can't drink normal sherry. I make cranberry and orange sauce, to DH's recipe (used to be his speciality) with port in one half but not in the other (for DiL)

SonIL 2 is the sprout guru - he always peels a sackful on Christmas Eve, with TV on and glass in hand, wherever the meal will be. I don't let DS make bread sauce any more, since he took "Stir it so that it doesn't stick" to mean "Beat it until it becomes wallpaper paste" BTW, soya milk makes good bread sauce if the normal stuff is running low, and a carton of soya milk keeps for several weeks in the fridge.