I really don't want to cook a turkey!

Frozen roasties, bought ready-made gravy; pop the turkey in on 200 for half an hour, then turn down to 100 and forget it forever - as many hours as you please - you can even put it in the night before - but do wrap in foil to retain moisture. It is a sort of roast/steam idea and involves very little work!

Or buy a "pig- bird" - turkey, pork, pheasant etc. all wrapped one inside the other. My SIL makes a mean pig-bird - but I only eat the bird bits.

My lot aren't keen on turkey so last year when I was the cook I did a 5-bird roast from Aldi and it went down a storm. I still did the stuffing, pigs in blankets, roasties, gravy, cranberry, sprouts etc. It was really tasty and nice and easy to prepare.

They don't care for Christmas pud either so I did a big fresh fruit salad and a lemon pavlova. Nigella seems to have pinched my recipe for that!

You don't have to do turkey!

GrandmaH......with so many (to me Piccy eaters......in my book a guest eats what's put in front of them unless it will kill them) I'd go for a hot/cold collation as my Mum used to call it. Three small mains and then a selection of side dishes. Perhaps a Beef Wellington, Glazed Gammon. Salmon en croute, and a dish that's based on chicken pieces.....such as coq au vin or similar.

I find a really big trifle is always popular and can be done in layers a few days ahead with just the whipped cream added on the day. Also something like a frangipane tart with Christmassy elements added is a good 'cut and come again ' dessert.

Venison stew; lots of venison, onions, chestnuts, smoked bacon and carrots, and a good dollop of port and rich red wine and cooked slowly for hours and hours. Serve with roasties, sprouts, pigs in blankets, yorkshire puds anything you like. Personally I serve it with red cabbage and gratin dauphinoise. The gravy is in the stew.

It can be made in advance and frozen.

Oh, just cook the bloody thing. Take a deep breath and do it. Soon be over with.

Sounds delish Monica....and a jolly good idea....any stew improves with keeping in the fridge for several days.

Blimey, I thought it was going to be the family pet when I read the title

But now I'm thinking you'd have used the definite article rather than the indefinite.

Wouldn't you?

pardon?

Oh come on, jings You know the difference between A turkey (any old gobbler from the turkey farm) and THE turkey (the one that has been eating endless bags of poultry food plus all the family leftovers, and strutting round the back yard for months, bullying the cat)

Us pedants call that the definite article (the) or the indefinite (a)

But even if GrandmaH had said 'I really don't want to cook the turkey' she could have meant the one she'd had in the freezer for months and had grown quite attached to...

Thank you for the grammar lesson Elegran. in one ear, out the other

I have learned something today.

I am now going to go and eat the bit of cheese from the fridge. Melted on toast.

(I need to go shopping)

Definitely the bit of cheese then, not just any one from the many you have stashed in there?

I had to have a baked potato with a slice of ham - I've no cheese and I forgot to get the rolls out of the freezer.

Yes. the bit of cheese. As opposed to some cheese.

Don't make my head spin. Please.

At least you've had yours. I'm still looking for pyjamas. With hedgehogs.

We are not keen on turkey, we always have chicken.

We usually have a goose for Christmas, and a 3 or 5 bird roast for new year. The 5 bird roast we had last year from Aldi was delicious, and I would readily have another.

With hedgehogs? Do they have special pyjama finding abilities?

We're having a five bird roast a la Aldi's sometime over Christmas (still hoping for long walk and beach picnic Christmas Day), they are utterly delicious , no waste either (and very reasonable price!)

Can I join in GrandmaH, or do I have to start my own thread?
If I can join in - I'm hosting 14 (all family of various ages but no children, only grown ups) 3 days before Christmas day. I've ruled out a sit down meal and don't want to do a roast given the roasts we'll all be eating over Christmas.
It's informal, people won't necessarily arrive/leave at the same time and includes older teens. I've been wondering about laying out some interesting salads, dips, crisps/bread sticks, crudités followed by a a few pies. Currently, my thoughts are potato, onion and corned beef with a home made short pastry crust, cheese, onion and potato with a home made short pastry crust. I'd also make (delia's) red cabbage and other pie type accompaniments.
I've already made a couple of fruit cakes, bought a tin of fancy biscuits and will get cheese n biscuits and make a fruit salad to to with some fancy ice cream.
Does this sound ok to folks. I have my tin hat on and am open too suggestions. My aim is to do as much prep as possible long before people begin to arrive, so all I have to do is pop said pies in the oven as people have a drink and a catch up with each other.