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Christmas Dinner
Anybody get stressed about Christmas Dinner ? Read this from a butcher,
I’ve pinched this, but it’s fab!!
😂Just in case anyone is stressing about Christmas Day..............! 😂
Here's my top tip
🎄Christmas Dinner....
I have concluded that the inevitable stress of Christmas dinner is created by adverts, supermarkets and TV chefs...
It's a Sunday dinner for goodness sake!!!
The only difference is that you are allowed to open a bottle of wine before you open the kitchen curtains. 🍷🍷🍷
🙄We do it quite happily 51 weeks of the year but can we the consumers be trusted to manage by ourselves on one day of the year...apparently not!
Here goes...💓
1. Turkey... It's a big fecking chicken that's all, 20 minutes per lb plus 20 minutes at 180 degrees - jobs a good un! Get yourselves a meat thermometer £3 off the Internet poke it in the offending bird if it says 75 degrees or over its cooked!👏🏼
2. Stuffing - regardless of what Jamie Oliver says you do NOT need 2lbs of shoulder of pork, onions breadcrumbs,pine nuts and a shit load of fresh herbs to make stuffing....( no fecking wonder he's bankrupt if thats what he spends to make stuffing!)😜
What you need is Paxo and a kettle!! If you wanna liven it up squeeze 3 sausages out of their skins and mix that in with your Paxo before cooking 😉.
3. Gravy - Jamie Oliver is copping for this one aswell....
Bisto Jamie.... All you need is Bisto!
I ( nor anyone else I know) has got time on Christmas Eve to piss about roasting chicken wings and vegetables, adding stock and flour,cooking it for another half hour, mashing it all up with a potato masher and then straining the whole sorry mess to make gravy 😠😠😠
4. Vegetables...🍆 Never mind faffing round shredding sprouts and frying them with bacon and chestnuts to make them more palatable... If you don't like them don't buy and cook the fecking things!! If your family only eats frozen peas then that's good enough!
5. Roast potatoes... Yes I par boil mine then roast them in goose fat but Aunt Bessie also does the same 😉.
6. Trimmings /Christmas pudding and the like.... Aldi or Lidl!
(oh and while we're on the subject of pudding- if birds custard is what your family likes on the wretched thing then that's fine - you do not need brandy butter /rum sauce etc or anything else that costs a fecking fortune and takes 2 hours to make!)
7. Family....
Children.. Feed the little blighters first separately, if they only want turkey with tomato sauce - fine leave em to it, it doesn't matter. Once they are fed bugger them off to play with their Christmas presents so that YOU can enjoy your dinner in Peace!
Adults... Anyone that can manage to get their sorry arse to your dinner table is also capable of helping to serve up/ sort the kids out/ clear the table /wash up /dry up etc.
And Finally.....
NO ONE.... And I mean no one APART FROM THE COOK IS ALLOWED TO GET PISSED AND FALL ASLEEP BEFORE THE WASHING UP IS DONE!!!
Rant over 😂
🎄Merry Christmas!🎄
Cheers 🍷🍷🍷 Getting you all in the mood.
I always use Paxo as a base and then add chopped onion, chestnuts, more bread crumbs and more sage and an egg; sometimes venison sausage meat. Seems to come out OK. Cooking a turkey is child's play if you follow the timing in any decent cookbook. A cheap meat thermometer helps. No need for all these TV chefs.
annsixty The clip I watched had his wife and one of their children (a baby) in it as well. I think there’s probably quite a few different versions/clips of him making it, he’s been on tv for so long.
Ladyleftfieldlover Is Jamie’s gravy the best then? Is it worth the effort?
Lucca
I would ignore jamie Oliver too but equally I wouldn’t use
Paxo
Or bisto
Or aunt Bessie
And thats fine as its your choice.....but me ( and many like me) will use all 3 and enjoy our Christmas Dinner just as much
LOUISA1523
Lucca
I would ignore jamie Oliver too but equally I wouldn’t use
Paxo
Or bisto
Or aunt BessieAnd thats fine as its your choice.....but me ( and many like me) will use all 3 and enjoy our Christmas Dinner just as much
Of course. Did I say different?
Ladyleftfieldlover
I make Jamie Oliver’s gravy a few days ahead and freeze it. I make bread sauce ahead too, and freeze it.
Is it worth the trouble. Does anyone mention it? I suppose the answer must be yes or you wouldn’t do it.
Personally I like turkey gravy made with giblets ( if I can get them) onions and Bisto’s turkey gravy granules.
These things like gravy (not JO’s) bread sauce stuffing etc are one of the few things I’m quite good at which is why I make them (yes often freeze them too) no other reason … plus IMO they taste better , note IMO…..
Oh I love that! It's so funny, but also full of common sense.
Just the 2 of us so I have got a Cooks meal for about £36. Chosen one of their starters and will just make Christmas pudding. Cooks even send you instructions of what to do when. Couldn’t be easier.
I did love the posting Fleurpepper. So true.
I do my 'Christmas' feast in early December - as a family gathering, then I'm my daughter's guest for the real one. I make a lot ahead of time then just defrost or reheat, as I enjoy cooking that way - but not all at once and under pressure. There's vegans, vegetarians, those with allergies and carnivores to feed. Nobody here likes Christmas pudding so it's a giant peach and raspberry trifle (made the day before) instead.
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Birds custard tastes good with brandy added. Aldi Christmas Puds ditto. A good brandy.
Fleur just read your post that's so funny. Love the down to earth no nonsense view on Christmas lunch. Love a butcher with a sense of humour. 😁
I’ve only just read this. Yes it is common sense and like has been said just a big Sunday dinner.
As there is only ever six of us I buy my stuffing from my local butcher.
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