The Greatest Lie Told to Man...

BrandyGran

The worst possible thing to open is dangerous to open and I can’t understand why it continues to be allowed and that is a SARDINE tin with a metal loop which inevitably snaps off mid pull. I hold one end with a cloth while I try to pull the loop and lid off. One slip and the sharp edges will give you a nasty cut.

My pet hate is those ridiculously shaped corned beef cans with the little key that you are supposed to peel back the metal with. i recently managed to break the metal strip, resulting in a stressful attempt to open the can with a can opener. Thank goodness I have discovered M&S corned beef, which comes in a normal round can.

I've even managed to cut my finger trying to get a tablet out of the foil pack! It can be very sore, like a paper cut.

Well what about those infuriating "safety" lids on medications? My friend had very severe arthritis as a young woman with two little girls. Lining up arrows etc was very difficult for her, but she was ok if her 5 year old little girl was around, as she was very bright and had no problem opening them.!! And of course those "brilliant" painkiller packs where you have to push the tablet through the foil. I find that they either stubbornly refuse to come out without bending in the middle or they of course drop out very fast and then bounce on the table or whatever and land on the floor, where you cant bend to reach them! I have experimented with various places from a tray or table top or whatever and on bad days they still manage to cause me grief. But I have a tablet holder for a weeks tablets so it is only once a week that the air can be quite blue with my comments!!

Oreo has your Mum tried using nutcrackers to open the bleach bottles? Works for me and the friends I’ve passed the suggestion on to. They also get the tops off eye drop bottles, one of my grouses.

Oreo

Mum says that all child proof caps on items are also old person proof.☹️
She says she has a bottle of bleach under the sink that even Popeye couldn’t open.

My friend developed rheumatism in her hands at an early age and her then six year old DD had to open her, child proof, pill bottles for her. She became quite expert at it.

This was before blister packs, which create their own problems as many of us know.

I agree. It’s a lie

Mum says that all child proof caps on items are also old person proof.☹️
She says she has a bottle of bleach under the sink that even Popeye couldn’t open.

I have a big beef with some newly designed long life semi skimmed milk cartons from Lidl, now that the lid is not allowed to be removed completely from the carton they have for some reason designed a carton where the lid is sunken into the top of the container meaning that when you unscrew it lots of milk comes gushing out and when you try to replace the lid, milk caught in the lid gushes out as well.
I now open it over the sink.

Definitely! One of the few they will eat but drives me mad!

When you eventually get the plastic wrapper off the biscotti there's always a little bit of the plastic that somehow clings to your hand by static electricity. By the time you finally manage to put it down your coffee is stone cold.

Had it been anything other than biscotti biscuits I would have given up!
Perhaps I might persevere with good shortbread 😀

last night I practically ended up on the floor tryingto open the biscotti derved with my coffee

I pulled the little red tag, and it just came off. I tried tearint round the dhed, took my teeth to it alwithout success. In the end DD used a prong of the fork she was using to eat her dessert.

Blinking microscopic cooking instructions when I have to use a magnifying glass🙄
My recent can of corned beef came without a key. I opened it using an ordinary can opener and was rewarded with lumps of corned beef to use…(will check next time).

I agree with all of these. I also get annoyed at cooking instructions which are put on the bottom of packets. If u want to leave half the contents in the packet, u have to lift the packet up, and read from underneath.

We once bought a foreign made oven and heading the instructions was this inspiring sentence- “INSTALLING THIS MACHINE COULD NOT BE SIMPLE”

Thankyou Allira I’ll look out for one of those. Thankyou to all the posters on this thread. I’ve laughed so much. Peter Kay should buy this material for his shows!

My husband bought a pack of Twix biscuits yesterday - they were the single finger ones rather than the usual twin pack. My GS went to get one in the afternoon and said 'Granny, why are these so small? and he was right, they were tiny!

I agree whole heartedly with your last comment Witzend why does anything tech related assume I have a level of knowledge which I really don't.

Our ‘upgraded’ burglar alarm system really irks me - had to be done after the line went digital, or it wouldn’t work, so we were told by the ADT man.

So instead of a simple, very clear panel, where you just entered 4 digits to set and turn off, we now have a smaller one where it’s much harder to see the numbers, plus a screen that tells us what the weather’s like, temperature and all - and a bloody irritating American woman’s voice telling us that the system has been ‘armed’ or ‘disarmed’.

TBH I had already ceased to expect technological ‘improvements’ to make life simpler!

BERYLC

While we on the subject of thing difficult to open. How about those boxes of laundry pods, the squidgy things. It says "press both sides here" . well it's OK if you've got hands like a builders labourer. I haven't, I fight with the damn things and often resort to to rude words but it doesn't help. I really like to use those things but why do you need superhuman strength to get into them

Maybe that’s natures way of stopping you using something that’s polluting our oceans.

I needed some new kitchen scissors as my old ones had decided to divorce and had fallen into two halves.

I bought some new ones from the local hardware shop and they were encased in a tough plastic shell which proved almost impenetrable especially as I only had nail scissors on hand.

Finally, after a long and bitter struggle, I managed to extract the scissors only to find they were held on a piece of card by three thick cable ties.

While we on the subject of thing difficult to open. How about those boxes of laundry pods, the squidgy things. It says "press both sides here" . well it's OK if you've got hands like a builders labourer. I haven't, I fight with the damn things and often resort to to rude words but it doesn't help. I really like to use those things but why do you need superhuman strength to get into them

One size fits all. Really? I don't think so.

fun size

More like "how funny, that was only one mouthful".

Indigo8

While we are on the subject of disappointing merchandise, how can fun size be more fun than normal size when it often less than half the size?

Also has anybody else noticed how things are shrinking. I buy duck breasts every now and again and the last lot I bought were the same make and the same price but about half the size.

😁fun size? More like disappointingly small size.