Limericks 10

There was a young man whose feet
Were so small and exceedingly neat
No shoes would fit
So his Mum would knit
His woollen shoes, none could beat.

But when rain and snow fell

But when rain and snow fell
And he wore them all day ... what a smell!

But when rain and snow fell
And he wore them all day ... what a smell!
To cap it all, they shrank

But when rain and snow fell
And he wore them all day ... what a smell!
To cap it all, they shrank
Removal needed a yank

But when rain and snow fell
And he wore them all day ... what a smell!
To cap it all, they shrank
Removal needed a yank
Oh to have bigger feet was his yell

His fairy godmother heard his plea

His fairy godmother heard his plea
"Hmm", she said, "now let me see"

His fairy godmother heard his plea
"Hmm", she said, "now let me see"
My 'dust' bag I'll have to check

His fairy godmother heard his plea
"Hmm", she said, "now let me see"
My 'dust' bag I'll have to check
I'll cast my spell around your neck

His fairy godmother heard his plea
"Hmm", she said, "now let me see"
My 'dust' bag I'll have to check
Shoes are needed, so you don't look a wreck

She waved her wand and there he found
A perfect pair upon the ground

His fairy godmother heard his plea
"Hmm", she said, "now let me see"
My 'dust' bag I'll have to check
I'll cast my spell around your neck
And you’ll hopefully end up a size three

I once walked from London to Looe

I once walked from London to Looe
Once there I bought a canoe

I once walked from London to Looe
Once there I bought a canoe.
But forgot the paddle

I once walked from London to Looe
Once there I bought a canoe.
But forgot the paddle
So used the handle

Of a very large didgeridoo

Boris has called an election

Boris has called an election
Be mindful- this needs reflection

Boris has called an election
Be mindful- this needs reflection
Can the chaos get worse?

Boris has called an election
Be mindful- this needs reflection
In December we’re told

Sorry Far North. Go with yours

Boris has called an election
Be mindful-this needs reflection
Can the chaos get worse
I was just going to curse

Boris has called an election
Be mindful-this needs reflection
Can the chaos get worse
I was just going to curse
Followed by a genuflection

And then I'll say a 'Hail Mary'

And then I'll say a 'Hail Mary'
And reach for a glass of sherry

And than I'll say a 'Hail Mary'
And reach for a glass of sherry
Or something stronger

And than I'll say a 'Hail Mary'
And reach for a glass of sherry
Or something stronger
Like a Courvoisier

And than I'll say a 'Hail Mary'
And reach for a glass of sherry
Or something stronger
Like a Courvoisier
I'm sure I've just seen a fairy!

My imagination is running wild