EVEN MORE VERSATILE VERSE !

Where's my dignity gone when I scream and push?
With strict midwives telling me to hush

It's much better introducing baby at a later date

It's much better introducing baby at a later date
So all but my loved one will just have to wait

For now, of course, lockdown means garden each day

For now, of course, lockdown means garden each day
I'm missing my friends and have so much to say

We have a good gossip it cheers us up

We have a good gossip it cheers us up
So we send good wishes as we raise our cup

It might contain tea but it could be champagne

It might contain tea but it could be champagne
Here’s to the bubbly ? and long may it reign

Memo to self to update shopping list

Memo to self to update shopping list
Last time I went shopping the alcohol I missed

Tonight there'll be wine and a candle on the table

Tonight there'll be wine and a candle on the table
Dinner is something from the cupboard without a label

I hope it's in date and tasty to eat

I hope it's in date and tasty to eat
Not stinky blue cheese that smells of feet

Followed by mushrooms found in the garden

Followed by mushrooms found in the garden
Hope it's not the 'magic' type. I beg your pardon?

And then we'll have a lemon sponge pudding

And then we'll have a lemon sponge pudding
Before my neighbour calls with her 'do-gooding'

She's warm-hearted but rather a pain

She's warm-hearted but rather a pain
All she does is moan and complain

Me, I prefer to look on the bright side

Me, I prefer to look on the bright side
Hoping something good will soon turn the tide

So long as we have good friends and our family

So long as we have good friends and our family
We'll be alright - oh and my neighbour Mr Sam Lee

He owns our local take-away

He owns our local take-away
And for something really tasty I am happy to pay

I fancy some chicken with a sweet and sour sauce

I fancy some chicken with a sweet and sour sauce
There's no way I can aim for any weight loss.

Once the lockdown is over, I'll be overweight for sure

I fancy some chicken with a sweet and sour sauce
With a portion of salad and noodles of course

And after I’ve eaten, a long, solo walk

Oops sorry

I fancy some chicken with a sweet and sour sauce
There's no way I can aim for any weight loss.

Once the lockdown is over, I'll be overweight for sure

Once the lockdown is over, I'll be overweight for sure
So bloomin huge I won't get outside any more

I'll just live indoors with my lovely house-cat

I'll just live indoors with my lovely house-cat
But I may get so big I can't lean down to give him a pat!

Some restraint is needed, and some keep fit with Joe

Some restraint is needed and some keep fit with Joe.
Or a walk on the Downs with the beach down below.

It’s a favourite haunt of walkers galore,

It’s a favourite haunt of walkers galore,
I think I'll join them instead of a sofa - snore

Can't help it - the radiator makes it cosy and warm

Can't help it - the radiator makes it cosy and warm
but I'll get out early tomorrow and see the dawn

Despite all the problems there's the beauty of Spring

Despite all the problems there's the beauty of Spring
Crisp and cool , it makes you want to sing.

I'll wake up early and go for a stroll

I'll wake up early and go for a stroll
A walk in the woods here will be my main goal

Then home for a workout with lively Joe Wicks

Then home for a workout with lively Joe Wicks
Then collapse on the sofa while tv channels I flicks

But all I can find is lots of repeats