VERSATILE VERSE 3

But no! There in black and white is my madness,
I stare at it with anger and sadness.

But then I go online yet again

But then I go online yet again
Another purchase, another bargain !

I really must stop this madness

I really must stop this madness
I will, I will when we're over lock down sadness

Then it'll be shopping out to help out

Then it'll be shopping out to help out
Some shops are bankrupt, I've no doubt

So let's give them a bit of support

So let's give them a bit of support
And thank them for holding the fort

We’re the cavalry coming to the rescue

We’re the cavalry coming to the rescue
I’ll spend, spend, spend, won’t have a clue

It will all add up, I’m sure of that

It will all add up, I’m sure of that
But I’ll try not to fret when the bill knocks me flat.

First purchases, not counting hair nails and coffee?

First purchases, not counting hair nails and coffee?
Then I’ll treat myself to the chewiest toffee

No, can’t do that, my dentures will crack

No, can't do that, my dentures will crack
with all this rain I'll have a new mac

No need for a sundress, the holiday's off

No need for a sundress, the holidays off
I’m going back to bed with my non-Covid cough!

I’ll wait for the drinks and the offers of food

I’ll wait for the drinks and the offers of food
I should be lucky, he’s not that good !

When I was in labour, he ran from the room

When I was in labour, he ran from the room
Nowadays he’d probably watch it on Zoom!

He’s nothing like my idea of a hero

He’s nothing like my idea of a hero
In fact, the score I would give him is zero.

He looks so silly in his Superman pants

He looks so silly in his Superman pants
Especially if he jumps up and down as if they're full of ants!

I think a Dr Who outfit would fit him better

I think a Dr Who outfit would fit him better
It suits him to the letter

He looks the bees knees

He looks the bees knees
Long scarf waves in the breeze

But clothes are essential, no pretty sight bare!?

But clothes are essential, no pretty sight bare!
to see him like that would be a bit of a 'mare

He'll look more attractive in flattering attire

He'll look more attractive in flattering attire
Whatever he wears he looks pretty dire.

But maybe top hat and tails would suit him

But maybe top hat and tails would suit him
His head is too small, his eyes in line with the brim

My mum always said he was not good enough

My mum always said he was not good enough
His family wasn’t quite the right stuff

Truth be told, she was rather high falutin’

Truth be told, she was rather high falutin
Airs and graces really, so not suiting

I will pick and choose my own feller

I will pick and choose my own feller
and I'm certainly not afraid to tell 'er

Can't think why she wants to look down on others

Can't think why she wants to look down on others
When I've got at least six half-brothers!

She was very 'friendly' when she was young

But older, she’s got quite a sarcastic tongue.

It sometimes seems nothing I do can be right.

In spite of applying my effort and might.

It seems some can win while some linger behind.