Limericks 17

Let's cheer ourselves with some bunting
For scraps of fabric I'm hunting
I’ve buttered the buns

Let's cheer ourselves with some bunting
For scraps of fabric I'm hunting
I’ve buttered the buns
Invited the nuns

Let`s cheer ourselves with some bunting
For scraps of fabric I`m hunting
I`ve buttered the buns
Invited the nuns
But en masse they`ve all gone punting

I hope that they`ve got a strong pole

I hope that they’ve got a strong pole
Don’t want to end up in a hole

I hope that they've got a strong pole
Don't want to end up in a hole
Their habits got caught

I hope that they've got a strong pole
Don't want to end up in a hole
Their habits got caught,
Under, they had nought

hope that they've got a strong pole
Don't want to end up in a hole
Their habits got caught,
Under, they had nought
So laughing was hard to control

A Scot who was very well built

A Scot who was very well built
Could not find a suitable kilt

A Scot who was very well built
Could not find a suitable kilt
Cut up a blanket

A Scot who was very well built
Could not find a suitable kilt
Cut up a blanket
His mother tacked it

A Scot who was very well built
Could not find a suitable kilt
Cut up a blanket
His mother tacked it
To ensure his 'ahems' don't wilt


Where will he put his sgian-dubh

Where will he put his sgian-dubh?
He'll bung it down his sock, don't you?

Where will he put his sgian-dubh?
He'll bung it down his sock, don't you?
Then drink a wee dram

Where will he put his sgian-dubh?
He'll bung it down his sock, don't you?
Then drink a wee
Down the pub with Sam

Haha Jan…what happened to the dram?

Where will he put his sgian-dubh?
He'll bung it down his sock, don't you?
Then drink a wee dram
Down the pub with Sam
They’d be better off with a brew.

From these limericks I’ve learnt much

From these limericks I’ve learnt much
Most of my lines are double dutch,

From these limericks I've learnt much
Most of my lines are double dutch
An education

From these limericks I've learnt much
Most of my lines are double dutch
An education,
Such dedication,

From these limericks I've learnt much
Most of my lines are double dutch
An education,
Such dedication,
Not exactly Wordsworth as such

Enthusiasm, we’re not short

Enthusiasm, we’re not short
Writing limericks is good sport

Enthusiasm, we’re not short
Writing limericks is good sport
Brain exercises

Enthusiasm, we’re not short
Writing limericks is goo sport
Brain exercises
Fog minimises

Enthusiasm, we’re not short
Writing limericks is good sport
Brain exercises
Fog minimises
And look forward to our next ‘slot’

Tbe sun’s bright, windows are showing

The sun’s bright, windows are showing
The grass needs a jolly good mowing