Limericks with very strict rules (7) 88558

The scariest Halloween beast
A spider which daily increased
It’s size was immense
A foot and nine-tenths
T’was over a metre at least

Thank goodness it went on its way

Thank goodness it went on its way
Don’t come back, I began to pray

Thank goodness it went on its way
Don’t come back, I began to pray
But it reappeared

Thank goodness it went on its way
Don’t come back, I began to pray
But it reappeared
Just as I had feared

Thank goodness it went on its way
Don’t come back, I began to pray
But it reappeared
Just as I had feared
I hope he won't view me as prey.

Almost Halloween...it's so soon!

Almost Halloween...it's so soon!
I must polish my witch's broom

Almost Halloween...it's so soon!
I must polish my witch's broom
Pumpkins, for heating

Almost Halloween...it's so soon!
I must polish my witch's broom
Pumpkins, for heating
The coven’s meeting

Almost Halloween...it's so soon!
I must polish my witch's broom
Pumpkins, for heating
The coven’s meeting
In a dark and disquieting room.

Scary movies appear on TV

If you like them, that’s fine - not for me

Scary movies appear on TV
They tend to frighten the baby

Scary movies appear on TV
If you like them, that’s fine - not for me
My heart beats like mad

Scary movies appear on TV
If you like them, that’s fine - not for me
My heart beats like mad
My nightmares are bad

Scary movies appear on TV
If you like them, that’s fine - not for me
My heart beats like mad
My nightmares are bad
They all show a murderous spree!

But wee trick-of-treaters are cute

But wee trick-of-treaters are cute
I'd still like to show them my boot

But wee trick-of-treaters are cute
I'd still like to show them my boot
I smile as they pass

But wee trick-of-treaters are cute
I'd still like to show them my boot
I smile as they pass
But oh, what a farce !

But wee trick-of-treaters are cute
I'd still like to show them my boot
I smile as they pass
But oh, what a farce !
When they turn out to be an old coot.

If I saw a ghost, I would shudder

If I saw a ghost, I would shudder
My body would start to judder

If I saw a ghost, I would shudder
My body would start to judder
I’d question it first

If I saw a ghost, I would shudder
My body would start to judder
I’d question it first
Then say, “Do your worst!”

If I saw a ghost, I would shudder
My body would start to judder
I’d question it first
Then say, “Do your worst!”
People would think I'm a nutter.

My least favorite house cleaning task

My least favorite house cleaning task
Is one that I do in a mask

My least favorite house cleaning task
Is one that I do in a mask
It’s cleaning the loo

My least favorite house cleaning task
Is one that I do in a mask
It’s cleaning the loo
The shower drain too