Limericks 18 (cont'd)

It’s droppings were everywhere
Evidence was on every stair
Now it’s got a wife
More droppings, not nice

I'm a little restless of late
My heart beats at a rapid rate
Spring fever, I'm told

It’s droppings were everywhere
Evidence was on every stair
Now it’s got a wife
More droppings, not nice
And quite a bit of bristly hair

I'm a little restless of late
My heart beats at a rapid rate
Spring fever, I'm told
Do I have a cold?

Did you realise that the ‘I’m a little restless’ Limerick was on Page 1?*

I'm a little restless of late
My heart beats at a rapid rate
Spring fever, I'm told
Do I have a cold?
No, just a very late update.

A chiropractor from Norwich

Wanted to finish her porridge

A chiropractor from Norwich
Wanted to finish her porridge
But it had gone cold

A chiropractor from Norwich
Wanted to finish her porridge
But it had gone cold
And even grown mould

A chiropractor from Norwich
Wanted to finish her porridge
But it had gone cold
And even grown mould
To find time to eat she’d forage

Horse Chestnuts are soon to flower

Horse Chestnuts are soon to flower
When the sun has a bit more power,

Horse Chestnuts are soon to flower
When the sun has a bit more power
The sun it will shine ☀️

Horse Chestnuts are soon to flower
When the sun has a bit more power
The sun it will shine ☀️
I'll sit and drink wine

Horse Chestnuts are soon to flower
When the sun has a bit more power
The sun it will shine ☀️
I'll sit and drink wine
Beneath its glorious tower.

There was a young cobbler from Kent

There was a young cobbler from Kent
Whose anvil was terribly bent

There was a young cobbler from Kent
Whose anvil was terribly bent
With hammer held high

There was a young cobbler from Kent
Whose anvil was terribly bent
With hammer held high
And a watchful eye

There was a young cobbler from Kent
Whose anvil was terribly bent
With hammer held high
And a watchful eye
His shoes were devoid of a dent

He had a girlfriend in Surrey

He had a girlfriend in Surrey
Who went everywhere in a hurry

He had a girlfriend in Surrey
Who went everywhere in a hurry,
Her soles were worn through

He had a girlfriend in Surrey
Who went everywhere in a hurry,
Her soles were worn through
Her feet almost blue

He had a girlfriend in Surrey
Who went everywhere in a hurry,
Her soles were worn through
Her feet almost blue
A shame she stepped in some slurry

A crying shame I cannot spell

A crying shame I cannot spell
My report said ‘did not do well’

A crying shame I cannot spell
My report said ‘did not do well’
But still, I can 'danse'

A crying shame I cannot spell
My report said ‘did not do well’
But still, I can 'danse'
Sing and clap my ‘hanse’

A crying shame I cannot spell
My report said 'did not do well'
But still, I can 'danse'
Sing and clap my 'hanse'
So on shortcummings I won't dwell

Perhaps I will write a novel