Lame Limericks (but they are funny anyway)

The next thing I knew I was broke
My life's wheel had broken a spoke
I began to climb trees
Which swayed in the breeze

The next thing I knew I was broke
My life's wheel had broken a spoke
I began to climb trees

The next thing I knew, I was broke
My life’s wheel had a broken spoke

My man said "You think you're so smart!"
"With I.Q. that's way off the chart"
I sImpered and blushed
Looking smug and quite flushed
‘til he said, “You look like a tart!”

I belted upstairs in a huff

My man said "You think you're so smart!"
"With I.Q. that's way off the chart"
I sImpered and blushed
Looking smug and quite flushed
And common sense just fell apart.

The next thing I knew, I was broke

My man said "You think you're so smart!"
"With I.Q. that's way off the chart"
I sImpered and blushed
Looking smug and quite flushed

My man said "You think you're so smart!"
"With I.Q. that's way off the chart"
I simpered and blushed

My man said "You think you're so smart!"
"With I.Q. that's way off the chart"

The first night I won a great deal
Took my fancy man for a meal
I proposed a toast
I was having a boast
And came out with quite a long spiel.

My man said "You think you're so smart!"

The first night I won a great deal
Took my fancy man for a meal
I proposed a toast
I was having a boast

The first night I won a great deal
Took my fancy man for a meal
I proposed a toast

The first night I won a great deal
Took my fancy man for a meal

But I'm ditching the diet for now
Off on holiday to Macau
As it's legal to gamble
I'm going to scramble
With all my know-how

The first night I won a great deal

But I'm ditching the diet for now
Off on holiday to Macau
As it's legal to gamble
I'm going to scramble

But I'm ditching the diet for now
Off on holiday to Macau
As it's legal to gamble

But I’m ditching the diet for now
Off on holiday to Macau

After a week I got on the scales
I weighed as much as hay, two bales
Then the mice ran out
I chased them about
Then went off to paint my nails

But I’m ditching the diet for now

After a week I got on the scales
I weighed as much as hay, two bales
Then the mice ran out
I chased them about

After a week I got on the scales
I weighed as much as hay, two bales
Then the mice ran right out

After a week I got on the scales
I weighed as much as hay, two bales

I see food, and to my surprise
It's too appealing, now my size
Means Salad and water,
Lettuce, no matter
Definitely no more French Fries.

After a week I got on the scales

I see food, and to my surprise
It's too appealing, now my size
Means Salad and water,
Lettuce, no matter

I see food, and to my surprise
It's too appealing, now my size
Means Salad and water

I see food, and to my surprise
It's too appealing, now my size

I see food, and to my surprise
The calories I analyse