WRONG ANSWERS!!

Only because he knew the cat was on the fiddle.

Why did Bill and Ben like Little Weed?

Because they don't like taking the scenic route.

Did the dish really run away with the spoon?

If I told you who I really am I would have to kill you.

Why do rockets take off straight up?

Because nobody likes a grass.

Who are you?

Because it's definitely a better idea than sinking.

Why has my lawn got more moss than grass now?

Because they can't find the drink to fall in.
Can I go back to Bilgeman.
Why do elephants have big ears.
Because Noddy won't pay the ransom.
Okay, to continue:
Why do huge cruise liners float

Because they don't think, they know.

When I'm swishing a fly away, why does it decide to target my eyes?

So you can practice throwing them across the room

Why do cats think they are the boss?

Chocolate wasn’t on the list and you want to pretend it was

Why is packaging getting harder to open

They don't want the trouble of getting out of their vans and can finish the round in half the time.

Why do I forget my shopping list.

Because they are too idle to look for their own

Why do delivery drivers lie about no one being home?

It the day your cleaners come at least get up and let them in

Why do the squirrels steal the birds nuts

Because the milk monitor hasn’t been doing her job

Why have I gone back under the duvet, instead of cleaning the house ?

The government likes to confuse the plebs

Why is there never any milk left for my coffee?

To make sure we have some exercise.

Why do some countries change their name?

Because of the white lies you told your friends when they asked 'do I look fat in this dress?'

Why is the escalator always broken when I need to use it?

Because you would look too young if it were dark

Why is my nose getting larger as I grow older?

Because he gets a bit cross if we don't.

Why is my. hair going grey?

Because if it all went down we'd think we were rich.

Why do we celebrate St. Patrick's Day?

Because they are unable to sing.

Why is everything going up in price?

Because they like to show off

Why do bees buzz?

To make room for all the fish and other sea creatures.

Why are huge planes able to fly?

Because you upset them in 1985.

Why is the earth covered with more water, than land?

Because they are not cuddly like cats and dogs

Why do the bin men always leave mine up the road?

Because you are a big spender.

Why do people not like spiders?