Gransnet forums

Grandparenting

Grandparents wanted

(33 Posts)
Guppie Sun 24-Jul-11 18:44:26

Thanks everyone, at least we know people like you are out there ;)

We live in quite a young neighbourhood, no no obvious neighbour candidates. I do wonder about someone from church as there are a lot of older people there but again no-one obvious so far. Maybe we need to move to a more established area!

grannyactivist Sat 23-Jul-11 00:40:59

I am a surrogate Granny to several children. Today I was very proud to attend the Graduation ceremony of one of my young friends in the company of her husband and three daughters. She introduced me as her surrogate mother and I cannot describe how privileged I felt. I do wish you success with your quest Guppie.

bikergran Fri 22-Jul-11 22:06:48

ohh what a lovely thought...im sure there are obsticles to over come...but how lovely that would be to "adopt" a grandparent/s ..hoep you find a way round it.. good luck smile

janreb Fri 22-Jul-11 12:10:04

When we first moved from the midlands our new next door neighbours became surrogate grandparents to our children - they still my mother as she lived with us but had never had much to do with my husband's parents. We all became very close to this couple - he even walked my middle daughter down the aisle as my husband couldn't manage and hubby waited at the end for her and just gave her away. They had grandchildren, and great grandchildren of their own but treated ours exactly the same. We lost dear Nip earlier this year, very suddenly, and he is missed by everyone. If I ever had the opportunity to do what they did I wouldn't hesitate.

Stansgran Thu 21-Jul-11 22:56:54

When we moved away from our original home and left 2 grandmothers both widows I found distance to travel and the costs involved made the children more or less grandparentless. An elderly couple were friendly and helpful as we settled in and enjoyed the childrens company also neighbours who had cared for elderly parents and married late with no children took an interest in them and a lady who lived on her own nearby kept inviting them to play the piano. We were very lucky-but I think there are plenty of people like that still around-be friendly and you will find that people will want to get involved . My mother away fom her grandchildren befriended a neighbour's little girl-go for walks and stop and talk you will soon find the people who want to be surrogate grandparents-they may not know it yet!

Janice Thu 21-Jul-11 21:09:11

Where are you? If we knew your nearest twon/city maybe someone could assist?

Guppie Thu 21-Jul-11 19:34:15

Oops sorry, I've edited that wrongly. It should read

^I feel she's missing out on so much - and so are we - by not having grandparents about. Everything from practical help to advice to just that special relationship.

So I am wondering whether we could "adopt" local "grandparents". But I don't know how or who. There would be all the potentially awkward bits of personality clashes or mismatched expectations.
I hope we could provide family for someone older without people around too, it to be a 2 way thing.^

Also I was going to add, doing this without making her biological grandparents feel bad. But to be honest they are so little involved in our lives that I don't think they'd notice.

Guppie Thu 21-Jul-11 19:25:42

Hello all,

First sorry for the intrusion - I am a Mum not a Gran. But I'd appreciate your advice. We are a family in the Midlands with an infant-school age child.

We have no family nearer than 70 miles away, and the three grandparents all have physical/mental health/social issues that stop them being involved in our little one's life.

I feel she's missing out on so much - and so are we - by not having grandparents about. Everything from practical help to advice to just that special relationship. I hope we could provide family for someone older without people around too, it to be a 2 way thing.

So I am wondering whether we could "adopt" local "grandparents". But I don't know how or who. There would be all the potentially awkward bits of personality clashes or mismatched expectations.

I'd appreciate advice from those who've been around longer than us and might have some wisdom on this. Thank you.