daughter tired out with grandchild but does not want my help

Eggshells indeed! DD2 who lives nearby gobbled up any help I could offer and was quick to express her thanks. But I suspect that DD3 who is expecting in January will be more like your DD - so let me know how you manage.

I always make a point of telling DD1 and DD2 how well they are; and when they ask me for advice I give it but always say "Mother knows best - follow your instincts."

But it sounds as though your DD is feeling really quite touchy as you are not "interfering" with her care of the baby, but just helping with the housework.

Let me know how you manage things - and I wish you good luck.

Annieg, personally, I'd let her be for a while. She's probably all over the place adapting to being a new Mum and aware herself that maybe things aren't getting done. If you bowl in, however well meaning, and help without being asked then she may well take that as a criticism.

Being worried about her being possibly depressed: would it be an idea to broach that with her husband, just air your worries to him maybe?

We tread on eggshells with adult daughters not something my Mum ever did with me!

Thankyou JessM
I will grovel again otherwise the wory will make me evem more tll

Oh dear. I can understand why you are worried. Have you spoken to her husband/partner?
Other than that, all i can suggest is grovel. Say sorry for treading on her toes. Say you hope she didn't feel criticised. Tell her she is wonderful mother. Tell her you love her and that you are itching to look after her because she is still your girl. etc