Grandparents Rights

I am fighting for every alienated grandparent in the UK

I just signed the petition "U.N. Recognize Parental Alienation As Violence And Abuse AgainstChildren" and wanted to see if you could help by adding your name.

Our goal is to reach 25,000 signatures and we need more support. You can read more and sign the petition here:

www.change.org/p/u-n-recognize-parental-alienation-as-violence-and-abuse-againstchildren?recruiter=57189342&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=share_email_responsive

I think it is sad that children stop their parents from seeing the grandchildren , but I can't think that making it the law for Grandparents to have to see the grandchildren will make for any better relations with the parents . I would imagine greater resentment and anger would ensue . I know this isn't what you think or want to hear . Negotiations , reconciliation , whatever it takes , resolving the issues , calling time on the fights is surely better

I've looked at the petition and it is nothing to do with grandparents not being allowed to see their grandchildren.
It's about one parent alienating the children from another parent.
It also goes on:
Since 1990, ..........., a more pernicious form of Parental Alienation has permeated parent-child relationship. Parental Alienation is now perpetrated not only by alienating parents, but States ministries and departments, judicial system and child protection services profiteering. Children are cruel and brutally removed without any evidence or proof that the alienated mother or father is harmful to the child.

It is not clear which countries are being referred to here, and I'm really not sure how a petition to the United Nations can possibly address such issues, since the UN has no powers over member states.
Sorry Maniac I am aware of your situation but I won't put my name to ill-thought through petitions.
If Social Services and Child Protection Agencies in this country are thought to be guilty of causing parental alienation then surely there are better ways of raising concerns than a petition to Ban Ki-moon and the others named.

I don't know anything about the petition but I do know that grandparents do not have rights; they have responsibilities.

My heart goes out to any GP who is CO (cut off) from their GC, for whatever reason except abuse (and I trust that's not the case here). I have to agree with absent, though, that we GPs don't have any more rights over other people's/our children's children than anyone else does. I agree, too, with aggie, that if parents are forced to let their kids see their GPs, it will probably just cause more resentment and anger.

Some GPs wouldn't care, I know. They've given up on their AC (adult children) and CIL (children-in-law) and just want to see their GC. But if the parents are resentful, any little thing could set them off and they might just ignore the court order. I've heard of that happening even now and the courts don't/can't do much to enforce the order. Maybe it would be different with a definite law, but I don't know. So much better, IMO, to try to fix the relationship with the parents (I know that's not possible in some cases).

But absent, I'm not sure what "responsibilities" we have as GPs, except to be nice, decent, reasonable people, as in any situation. It's not our job to babysit, even though some young parents think it is. (I do lots of babysitting and love it but not every GP can/does.) It's not our job to help our AC or GC out financially either though I know many GPs do if necessary. Most of us are "there" for our AC and GC if they need help cuz we love them so very much, not cuz of any responsibility.

Anyhow, Maniac, jainesworth is right, the petition you linked us to is about parental alienation, not GP alienation. Nor is it specific enough. I don't know you're situation, but judging by jaines' comments, I assume it's a painful one. And I'm so sorry about that. I just don't think this petition will help.

As for the petition you linked, Shadow, I'm sorry but I don't think it's specific enough either. It's definitely about GPs, but it doesn't say exactly what's being asked or whether or not there would be exceptions for GPs who have been abusive in any way. Is it simply about GPs getting to see their GC, which could be covered by a couple of invitations to school plays and so forth? Is it about visits, in general, or getting alone-time? Does it include overnight or longer visits for GPs who live farther away? Or maybe for all GPs? How about if GPs badmouth the parents while the GC are with them? Is that ok or do they then forfeit their visitation? My point is there are so many ins and outs here that aren't covered. If you've been CO from your GC (you didn't say), I'm so very sorry. But, sad to say, I don't think this petition will help very much.

Oh, I just realized, "not badmouthing the parents" is a "responsibility." As is following the parents' rules when you (general GP) watch their kids. So you're right, absent, we do have responsibilities. But that's true of anyone who's involved with someone's kids, not just us GPs.

As for that Duluth (spelling?) model, I think some of it is ridiculous! Especially the part about parents controlling their kids relationships. Sorry, but I think parents have the right to decide who their underage kids can spend their time with and how much. True, I think it's usually very wrong when one parent keeps the kids away from another. But, sometimes, even then, they have good reason, like if the other parent does drugs and so forth. Also, IMO, it's very sad if they keep their kids away from GPs or any other loving relative. But again, often, they have their reasons.

TBF, I'm not sure if this diagram is referring to parents who simply end contact with GPs or whoever. I know that some abusive parents isolate their kids from just about everyone, so that no one finds out what's going on and so forth. Maybe that's what the wheel is referring to. I doubt it would be considered abuse for parents to CO a GP who is constantly encouraging the GC to break the parents' rules and so forth. So I don't think this model applies in every case, anyhow. I don't know. Like many of the GP rights petitions I've seen, it's way too general.

Like aggie, I know these aren't the things you want to hear, Shadow and Maniac. And I'm sorry about that. But this is what I'm thinking and feeling.

I don't sign online petitions, anyway, though. So maybe my view is skewed. I don't know.

There are two different petitions. I think some may be confused.