Gransnet forums


The perils of 1st time grandparenting

(7 Posts)
scarlet1 Fri 13-May-16 10:06:57

I remember the first time I became a Gp 11ys ago and having 3 children who had escaped the majority of life's major pitfalls I though I was going into the role with experience and knowledge. However you must take into consideration that things change. My Midwife and medical advice constantly warned of the perils of putting my child on its back and that my child would be harmed and contribute to SIDS . like all parents my nightmares and worry became ingrained and I dutifully followed an panicked if anybody put baby on there front. With my GD the advice had changed so what had been ingrained in me as the right thing to do was now a thing that was the worst thing I could do.
Now all reasonable people would say things change and I agree, but be prepared to have to tie your hands and fret when there is a big change. You are doing something that for years you where told was the worst thing ever, add this to the fact that every child has at sometime been ill and you start to think maybe that was something that I did wrong but I thought I was doing it right. With my 2GC, some of the advice is completely changed again, but I don't fret because I now know that I am experienced yes, but am as new to the knowledge game as the parents.
Being a GP can be amazing and My 11yr old GD has become a little adult who I can share such wonder experiences and love.

Deedaa Sat 14-May-16 21:02:58

Even with my own babies I'd always had a feeling that the sleeping advice was wrong and I was pleased to find it had changed. My main problem with the grandchildren was all the "stuff" that had changed. Hugely complicated re usable nappies that took ages to put together after washing, car seats and buggies that needed a physics degree to use them - car seats? Didn't have one of those and whatever happened to the trusty Mclaren buggy? Feeding bottles seemed to have a lot of extra bits and even mixing formula was done differently. The baby itself was the easy bit!

notanan Sat 14-May-16 21:29:39

oh god it's no different for current parents of young children.

Many of the baby items I bought for my first had been banned or recalled or advised against or had killed babies by the time I was babyshopping for no2.. and there wasn't even that big a gap between them!

The car seat I had for no1 had been exposed as unsafe and under tested.
I forward faced no1s car seat, now that I have no2 that's a no no until about 4years
I used cot positioners to keep no1 on their backs (kinda wedge things) to keep them safe, now they're dangerous and can kill babies
Peanuts were a no when weaning no 1, now they're a yes and its bad to introduce allergens to late if there's no family history…
We all had formula dispenser thingies and could add that to pre-boiled water when out and about with no1, by no2 they were a no, the formula had to be added when the water was 70 degrees to scald the powder..

It's not just nans. Mums of more than one have the same problem!

notanan Sat 14-May-16 21:31:07

Didn't have one of those and whatever happened to the trusty Mclaren buggy?

Didn't they fall out of favour when one of their designs started amputating babies fingers in the states?
- see! it's a minefield!

aggie Sat 14-May-16 21:38:04

I haven't heard that babies should not lie on their backs ?

notanan Sat 14-May-16 21:43:00

When I was a baby the advise was babies could choke on their own vomit if hey lay on their backs.

This was based on the idea that a newborn's physiology is just a mini version of an adults. It's not quite. Babies don't choke if they vomit on their backs same way as say a drunk adult would.

Bellanonna Sat 14-May-16 21:58:54

In 1970 DD1 had to lie on her side. I had to turn her onto the other side every hour or so to prevent a misshapen head !. 1972 saw the vogue for baby on tummy, head to one side so that's what I did with DD2. I was quite surprised when my three little GC were laid on their backs from 2012 onwards. Surprising how quickly the thinking changes.