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Grandparenting

Sleep-disturbed Granddaughter

(5 Posts)
M0nica Tue 15-Oct-19 17:43:02

DGS is 9 and until a few months ago ended each night in his parents bed with his mother, while his father moved into his bed. He would also not sleep anywhere, not even at his grandparents, unless he had a parent with him, so he had done no sleepovers, no camping nothing.

His parents (and his grandparents) were relaxed about it, constantly encouraged him to stay in his bedroom. He was told he couldn't sleep on the top bunk of his bunk beds until he stayed in it all night, so he has quite happliy slept on the bottom bunk. We knew the time would come when he was ready to sleep all night in his own bed and it did

At the beginning of July, just after his 9th birthday he asked if he could have a sleepover with a friend, which he did. A few weeks later he stopped moving into his parents bed and is now proudly esconced on the top bunk. He has now been on several sleepovers and sometime soon he is going to stay overnight with us.

The moral of the story is that children differ and some child has to be at the extreme end of any distribution. Your DGD will reach a point when she feels confident and ready to sleep without a parent. For us DGS was 9 before he reached that point. But eventually he got there and I think he is more confident and happy because, although he was constantly encouraged, no pressure was put on him and when the time came he just did it on his own.

Hetty58 Tue 15-Oct-19 16:43:17

One of my granddaughters is nearly nine and has never slept through. It's not her fault, or due to 'soft' parents. She often has night terrors (and can't be consoled) as well.

A weighted blanket has helped somewhat (although she isn't autistic) in her getting back to sleep a little faster. She has a bed in a room with her sister, another in her parent's room so she can choose where to sleep. Often, her mum sleeps with her and always they have disturbed nights.

She's very active and has trouble sitting still so has meltdowns on car journeys or in situations where she can't run around much. I take her out on long walks and she has active hobbies.

Everybody is different. It's amazing how well most children adapt to our daily demands and routines, including education. As a teacher, I found that some pupils need to have quite a few allowances made.

One day she will grow out of it and they can all get a full night's sleep!

LondonGranny Tue 15-Oct-19 16:30:19

...if it's more like night terrors though the GP should be able to help.
www.nhs.uk/conditions/night-terrors/

LondonGranny Tue 15-Oct-19 16:28:00

Try this. It certainly works with bed-wetting.
www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/dont-worry-mom/201408/the-dos-and-donts-the-sticker-chart

Lyndiloo Tue 15-Oct-19 16:22:18

My granddaughter is now six. For some years (since she was about two, I think) she has got up in the middle of the night and woken her parents. They were soft with her. And it's still going on! I feel that they really have to do something now - it's getting ridiculous! My daughter gets up (usually at around 3.00 am) and goes into granddaughter's bed with her. Both parents work full-time, and are so tired. And granddaughter must be too! Any ideas?

(They also have a 3-year old son, who never wakes up - even if his sister is crying.)