giving birth to first child at home

My daughter-in-law had her first and only son at home. He was a whopper at almost 10lbs, but it all went very smoothly. She always says she was glad to be in her own home surrounded by her own things, and we parents were all able to visit briefly about 1 hour after the birth. My grandson was and still is healthy and full of beans. I hope you can put your mind at rest, I’m sure your daughter has done her own research.

Give her all you support - but make sure there are processes in place if there are any problems. A good midwife will allow for the 30 minute travel time. If there are any concerns at all they won't support a home birth and will encourage other options. I hope all goes well and you can enjoy your new edition! x

Adam Kay no less !

Most of these comments are tremendously reassuring for the OP, however, I can’t resist quoting the Doctor turned best-selling author who says that “home deliveries are for pizzas” !

For whatever it's worth, babies are often born inside a car on route to the hospital. There's always a smiling taxi driver, policeman or fireman proudly telling the entire world how mother and baby turned out perfectly fine!

DD2 was born naturally, but it had to be in hospital as I had had a section 2 years before.

Such mixed feelings here due to personal experience. I was as fit as a fiddle when expecting DD1- and the obstetrician kept saying birth would be straight forward and I was keen to have baby at home- especially as hospital was close and OH is a doctor and was working in obstetrics at the time. Went over dates, and as was the norm in the 70s - Consultant obs decided to induce- was disappointed. 2 hours later, the midwife examined me and said 'just leave you for a mo, going to have a word with Mr C'. I could hear them arguing behind the door- he came in, examined me and told midwife ' ah well, yes you are right' turned to me and said 'sideways breech my girl, but you can do it'- I was not unduly worried or anxious. 10 hours later- not dilated properly and both baby + me in distress = emergency section. Fortunately, Consultant Anestheatist (oops sp?) had just done a course on epidurals and rushed in to do his first at the hospital. Weirdest thing as I knew all the staff present - nurses, junior docs and registrar, pediatrician was a good friend ...

Ever since then ... must say I'd we concerned if any of Ds decided to have first one at home. But what can you do- apart from discussing procedure just in case. How close is she to good hospital if required.?

After reading all these stories it seems home births are more often than not quite wonderful. Since one of my hospital deliveries was a disaster and probably left me with PTSD, I’d opt for a home birth looking back. Added to which hospital infections are a worry. I hope everything goes well ! You have so much to look forward to.

Congratulations on impending new arrival! DIL had a successful home birth with our first grandchild. Her decision, made with all due consideration of risks. Not my place to interfere in their decisions. I chose hospital births when I had my babies 30 years ago and would have resented my parents or PIL questioning my decision.

My hairdresser’s D was just like yours, would not consider hospital birth for her first.
Her mum was worried but tried not to show it.
A few hours into labour D changed her mind and went to hospital , perhaps yours will do the same.

Pinkhousegirl - some good news coming from me - when my daughter told me she intended to have a home birth I was sceptical especially as she was born by emergency Caesarian section but I did know I was having to have a section so it wasn't a home birth gone wrong. My daughter decided to pay for her care with the South London Midwives - which no longer exists because the insurance costs soared and put them out of business - a pity because the care they gave far outweighed anything available in the NHS - sorry to Jane 10 and your family of midwives but this is a reflection of the bureaucracy and not the midwives themselves - anyway, my daughter had her first baby at home with the two midwives in attendance who had taken care of her throughout the pregnancy, it was natural and normal and rather than being parcelled up and posted home within hours, she was able to have a bath in her own home, and my new granddaughter was able to bond very easily. Second baby was born with the same midwives in attendance and whilst there was a slight complication everybody remained calm and the issue righted itself.
I really don't like the idea that a woman who decides she doesn't want hospital intervention is classed by other women as indulging in a 'middle class fad' - as women we should be supporting each other instead of labelling what we ourselves don't want as something to be sneered at.

My mum gave birth to me and all seven of my siblings at home, with the help of midwife Nurse Powick and afterwards a home help.
We lived on a farm in the middle of nowhere, with no electricity, no phone or any other modern conveniences.
I'm the eldest, born in the early hours of Boxing Day in 1943 and never thought to ask my mum how they contacted the midwife, probably the village phone box. She arrived on a pushbike as I remember from the arrivals of my younger siblings. Just wish I'd asked more questions when mum was here.
Anyway, we were all safely delivered and mum was fine, although confined to bed for many days back then.
As long as your daughter's pregnancy is progressing normally I'd say relax and don't worry too much.

I had my first three children at home with no problems at all. I was told I had to have the 4th child in hospital because there was more of a chance of problems.

I worked as a community midwife and we did planned home births for low risk women. Some first time mums also insisted on a home birth.I have to say all came to a happy conclusion thankfully.
The women had one to one care and had agreed if I thought it necessary they would go to hospital where I would stay with them.
Try not to worry,home births are safe.Midwives don't take chances.

My daughter had her first child at home. It was a water birth. The midwife came and everything went well, though there should have been 2 midwives but it happened so fast that she didn't arrive in time. If her doctor had thought there may be problems she would have gone to hospital.

I had my first at home in the early '90s. No problems. They did say, at the first sign of any problem, I'd be whisked into hospital.

Yes. My best friend did two weeks ago. It did not go well. She is a health care professional too. It was her second baby but first at home.
I can’t have mine at home and wouldn’t if I could. My c section is planned for 5 weeks from now. X

I had home births and all went well. I found it very relaxing. I had a friend who did need transferring to hospital during a home birth but it was discovered the baby had a short cord, something which would have been picked up at the later scans that my friend was asked to attend but didn't. Nevertheless they did fine once they got to hospital.
Although there is a an increased risk for home-births for first time babies (not so for subsequent births) please remember it is still very low and will include unplanned home-births - more likely that an unplanned home-birth will be a first baby as the mum may be young and inexperienced and may not recognise how far labour has progressed or may even hiding the pregnancy.

I think I would try to understand why she wants this...give her the chance to explain to you why, which in turn will clarify it to herself as well. If there are positive reasons, it may help you to feel better about it. And remember that they are so much more on the ball with things these days, so I wouldn’t worry too much. If it’s early in in the pregnancy things may even change but if she’s still determined, I would take a step back and look forward to grandparenthood!

I had my first 4 at home in the 60s with no problems.Try not to worry.There is medical help there if needed.

If you mention it, they tend to dig in. Just be supportive and helpful and leave it to them. Don’t spoil your relationship as Grandmother before it even starts..
Lots of love and support..

planned home birth as safe as hospital, a friend who was a midwife said she'd not consider hospital birth as she knew what happened! You can be transferred if need be. If it looks like there will be a foreseen problem, transverse lie maybe, then she'd be advised to go in for the birth. Suggest she joins a home birth group, who would be able to suggest some reading for you but maybe this might help you feel better www.rcog.org.uk/en/news/rcog-statement-on-bmj-home-birth-study/. One thing about a stay in hospital is that haemorrhages do not always happen straight away, they can happen sometime later, and if mum is home with dad it may well be picked up earlier than in hospital, especially if mum is in a private room. See the stats in the article. Maybe you could suggest a doula too, maybe even contribute towards the cost.

I had my first baby in a nearby GP unit in the 1970’s. This is a unit halfway house between a hospital and home. All went well but as I needed forceps just before my daughter was born the midwife rang my GP to do the procedure. If he hadn’t arrived I would have been sent to the local hospital. Hope all goes well for your daughter.

My youngest daughter gave birth to her first baby on our sofa 12 yrs ago. By the time the hospital said the contractions were close enough for her to go in she went to the loo and the sack came down so they sent an ambulance and a midwife but it was too late to take her to hospital so they moved her to the sofa and she gave birth about 10 mins later. The midwife said there was no point going to hospital then as they would send her home in about 3 hours.
By the time she had her 2nd baby 3 yrs ago she had moved to Cornwall and opted for a home birth. Her waters broke so she phoned the midwife who said it sounded as if they had plenty of time and she should be there within the hour. My daughter decided to have a bath and as she sat down the baby just slid out. Her partner called an ambulance which arrived at the same time as the midwife. My daughter was apparently very calm but her partner who had not experienced childbirth before was in a state of shock. Once again she stayed at home.

Jane10 What harsh and insensitive comments! There are two midwives at a home birth because one is needed for the mother, the other for the baby. In many cases, the midwives are not being deployed from a hospital but work privately so there is no question of 'self-indulgence'. Two of my granddaughters were born at home - it was a wonderful experience for all concerned (and they bring all the kit so no mattresses are ruined!)