DGD is 30 months and still not speaking. She can say ‘mumma’, ‘dadda’, ‘dit’ and ‘da’ which means ‘sit down’ (usually said to their dog). She can do baby babble, but no more. She is extremely clingy to her father, but not to her mother. As grandparents, we have never been allowed to ‘hold’ her, even when she was tiny. She won’t look at us, come to us or play with us. She will sometimes take my hand to show me something, but what she wants to show me we never find out, as she then drops my hand as if she has been stung!
We have two other grandchildren, one 8 and one 15, and I also look after a little 2 year old boy who talks so much, and uses sentences already like ‘plane high in sky, no vapour trail!’ and ‘daddy gone for bike ride, short one’ and ‘Oscar had beans and bacon for breakfast’ – so it’s not like we have never been near children!
She is very physically able, but otherwise non-communicative. Her parents constantly ‘cuddle and kiss’ her, rarely putting her down. Her bedtime routine (devised by them) is: up to bed, she has a TV in her room and is ‘allowed’ to choose a film to watch. Mum lies on bed with her watching film until she hopefully falls asleep. She doesn’t. Dad goes and watches film, child screams, mum shouts at dad for letting child scream, and so on it goes.
She has to sit on dad’s lap to eat, or still be fed, and it is a sad sight to see her, head in one hand, fork in the other listlessly prodding her food as if she is an elderly person with all the worries in the world.
DH and I find it very hard to broach any subject – her parents think she is very clever, ‘brilliant’ in fact - her dad says ‘ she makes all her own cakes’
Oh this sounds like I am being a right old dragon, but I see a big problem that is only going to get worse. She is due back at Nursery next week and mum is already in tears about it and how she (mum) will cope without her!
Mum is my stepdaughter whom I have known since she was 11, and she has surprised me totally with how she is with her daughter. I had her down as Mrs Sensible. I really thought that would be ‘hands on’ grandparents’ as we were with the older 2 (My daughter’s children) but we really aren’t.
DH is very reluctant to ‘have a chat’ – he has always tiptoed round his daughter, but I don’t really feel it’s my place to advise……..
Sorry folks, I am grumbling in the politest way I can, I have worries for the child!
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