Interfering?

In the words of my Great Grandmother. A still tongue makes a wise head. There will probably be other children walking at the same time, peer pressure means having your Mom walk with you isn't cool! He sounds as though he is a sensible boy, just see how he gets on.

I used to walk to the bus or train (my choiced daily) and then to school from aged 7, not always with a friend.

It teaches independence and self reliiance.

Good luck to him.

I walked to school from the age of 5 until I was allowed to cycle there when I was 11. Initially, a teenage cousin kept an eye on me but there were also many other children walking to the same school at the same time. One huge drawback to the insistence that children have to be met from primary schools is the parking problem. These schools are, more often than not in the heart of a residential district and parking causes great annoyance and inconvenience to residents and delivery drivers. When my two youngest GSs were at primary school, my DiL walked to meet them in the school playground. When she had to work, they went to an after-school club or were met by a friend. Now in senior school, they cycle there and back.

I walked to school (a good 20 mins +) when I was 6!! I had roads to cross and alleys to walk down and no mobile phones. There will probably be other children and families walking the same way and he may arrange to meet and walk with a friend. It's not your call you'll have to trust him and your dd on this one.

The world has changed so much since I was little and at school. I walked to school and back from the age of 5. There was a lollipop lady to see us safely across the road but nobody thought anything of it. We walked in a group, all mixed ages. When my children were small, they went to a childminder who lived near the school and only had one road to cross. The roads were much quieter then though.

I first started letting my children walk home from school on their own when they got into year 6. Then as they grew more confident letting them walk to school alone.

That's because you live in an odd place, like me, yvonnebrown


I can remember the same routine when DD1 was at primary school but when we moved to London they just let the children out on their own.
Obviously London is a much safer place to live than the countryside.

Yes you should keep quiet, it's nothing to do with you; it doesn't matter what your relationship with DD is, it's still nothing to do with you. (As an incentive beyond the obvious, if you do interfere your tense relationship may well disintegrate and in addition your grandchild will learn not to trust you)

We live in Buckinghamshire, my 9 yr old grand daughter goes to the village school, only 5 mins way, and up to year 5 (her year) someone has to be at the gate to collect from school, they are not allowed to leave the playground until they see someone they know to collect the kids.(this is supervised by a teacher)
This is a lovely peaceful little village - so yes there are still schools that do this

Chewbacca

To be fair boat, I think the traffic in 1949 was probably a bit different to what it is in 2020. And the world is a different place now, unfortunately.

I remember getting excited when we saw a car coming along our road in about 1950!

youve been very gracious in response to some NOT very gracious replies BG

When mine started walking to school on their own I went through agonies, but I would not have thanked my MIL or my own mother asking if it was safe, unless they were offering to pick them up! (Which they would never have done in a million years). It is worrying, but they all survived and it taught them valuable lessons in staying safe. They are adults now with children of their own and managed to survive! Your grandson will to. My advice? Don’t interfere.

don't interfere.
it's not your place.
you are not the parent.
don't offer advice unless it is asked for.
if you antagonise your daughter she may go NC/LC.
you have to shew respect for her autonomy as the parent. don't comment on her decisions.
and don't pass your anxieties on to GS. let him grow.

Could you offer to drive him when the weather is bad or if he gets up late?
My daughter was about 9 when she would walk home from school, it was only one block away. She was a latchkey kid. She was only alone for about 15 min while I rushed home. Her Godmother reported me to the school, the godmother was a stay at home mom who never offered me any kind of help. Some kids are never ready to walk to school or home,my brother was one of those kids. 9 is a little young for a 25 min trek.Will he be walking with other neighbor children?

To be fair boat, I think the traffic in 1949 was probably a bit different to what it is in 2020. And the world is a different place now, unfortunately.

I started school in 1949 when I was five years and two months. My mother took me to school for the first two weeks and then we had a couple of days when I "took" her so she could be sure I knew what to do. After that I was on my own.

The journey involved crossing a quite busy road and then the A1 in North London followed by catching a bus or tram.

If I caught a tram I had to cross the A1 again as trams couldn't get up the hill to my school.

I never found it a problem. I sometimes think we infantalise our kids.

It’s normal to worry, but they have to be allowed to mature and grow. Remember mine loving walking to school with a friend from year 5. I was sad as loved walking with them. ?
I still worry about my eldest driving on motorways, by the way. And he’s 29! The worry factor never leaves us...

There are no more perverts around than there were 60 years ago. They are just mentioned in the news more often . I walked to and from school with my friend from the age of 7 , it was a mile away.
My children also walked to and from school from 7 , though this was in a New Town where the estates were built in circles with the school in the middle so they had no roads to cross .
My grandchildren’s school allows them to leave school on their own from year 5 , so aged 9 onwards . I agree with posters who say children need to gain a bit of independence before starting secondary school

I worry much more about my grandchildren than my own two! My daughter walked home from Junior School from when she eight years old, most of the way she was with her friend who lived a few houses further up to us. Mind you, there was only one road with traffic to cross for them. My eldest granddaughter walked to the local supermarket from school (Year 9) with her best friend. My daughter told her she could walk home herself as she had to get back to work (she does the school run, both GD are in the same senior school now). Unfortunately, my eldest GD has no idea how to get home from the supermarket, it isn't a journey she has ever done (unlike younger GD who has walked it with me several times). Luckily her friend was picked up from the supermarket by her Mum who kindly offered GD a lift home. My daughter is funny really, she goes everywhere by car and hasn't a clue herself how to walk from the supermarket to our house, it is a good twenty minutes walk uphill! I have explained to GD how to get home on the bus in case she does the same thing again with her friend, but told her to ring me if she has problems (I live with my daughter and GC)

Our grandson, age 10, was allowed to walk to school for the first time this week on his own. There is only one road to cross. He was ready by 7.30am to make sure he did not have to walk with his Mum and younger sister. He was allowed to go and post letters during the holiday and would have been allowed to visit the shop if it was not for people not keeping to distancing rules. He loves the independence.

Can you imagine sending a child home who had had an accident and was bleeding copiously these days, Minerva!

I do remember cutting my head open at school (I was about 6) and going to hospital to have it stitched but can't remember if my mother was told until later.

My little brother at the age of 5 or 6 fell at school and his head bled copiously. I was two years older and to my joy I was taken out of class and told to take him home, his hair matted with blood. It was a long walk up a hill to the bus stop on the main road and we sat on the bench to wait for the bus. A passing police car stopped and picked us up and drove us the mile and a half home. Mother, at home with our younger sibling had not been told that we were on our way and I now wonder if we even had a phone at that time. I have also wondered if we would have got into any car had we been offered a lift.

My older children went to middle school at 8 and I met them before they reached the main road which they thought was babying them. Now my 11 year old DGS is at High school, often until 5.30 thanks to music lessons and walks most of the way home carrying an expensive musical instrument then met by a parent to see him safely over the six lanes of a major road out of London. I worry every day. We worry more as we get older and grandchildren can be the most precious thing in our lives so it is natural to be anxious but not our place to interfere.

Just driven past our local junior school on their way home and noticed a significant number of children walking in groups of twos and threes.
Obviously there were lots of children with adults too.

Funnily enough, I was talking about this with my sister last night.

When she was five and I was seven, I used to take her to school (well, we walked together, with me nominally in charge) about half a mile away. My mum was heavily pregnant and my brother was born the month after my sister started school.

My own children had a middle school system and changed schools at 9 after being at a primary where we took them to and from. The summer before, parents used to let them go to a sweet shop, then to Woolworth's, then to somewhere a bit further, until they learned to make the journey and cross the roads in time for starting school. They met up with friends at pre-arranged places on the way.

Once there, though, they were not allowed to leave until home time. I once locked myself in the sitting room (another story!) and rang the school to ask if my son (then 13) could come and let me out at break time, as he had a key. They wouldn't let him, even with my permission, which I thought was ridiculous, although I suppose they didn't know it was actually me on the phone. We lived maybe 10-15 minutes away.

I agree that they are disempowered these days, and also feel that parents can't win. People complain if they don't see children play outside, yet they worry when they are making regular journeys at times when lots of other children will be on the streets going in the same direction.

The high cost of loving, I guess. Totally understandable concern but a decision that is actually none of your business. If mentioning it to your daughter, I hope your tone would be in the line of being impressed at the bravery of her decision and not an accusative opinion of error of judgement. This might stimulate discussion rather than defensiveness. Good luck if you decide to comment.