My Grandson does NOT love me

Sad for you, but he's just growing up. Little children don't drop hints they just come straight out with it.

I had a favourite gc. I'm not over affectionate but couldn't put this one down. He loved a cuddle and being read to but suddenly he grew up and you realise that your behaviour is no longer appropriate and you move on but never forget the lovely times you had.

That’s really upsetting. Some kids seem to go through an angry stage where they want independence and take out any frustration on those they feel safest with. He’s probably frustrated about something else in his life and being cheeky with you because he feels totally safe with you. My nephew went through a stage like this but changed back to being affectionate. He was having a hard time at primary school due to not being able to keep up in one subject and we wondered if that was why but it could just be an age thing. He is now twenty adored his gran and still likes hugs!

Yes he is growing up, I understand how you feel because I helped bring my granddaughter up and its completely natural you feel the way you do when you have had a strong bond in her early years.
Some of the replies you have had seem a bit harsh, be kind people.

I’m sure your grandson loves you, but it’s obvious that what you are doing him is annoying him, I wouldn’t be constantly cuddling him, nor would I Pat him on the head, he is growing up and give him the space he needs, he’s no longer a baby, you have to respect him as a little person

My grandson has just turned five, and because of COVID will not let me touch him or his little sister, he says he doesn’t want to get any germs. So maybe that could be the answer, we don’t know how their little minds work.

I think your grandson is speaking rudely to you. Certainly you have to back off. I hope you can keep your cool and politely tell him so.

He's just being a boy! My son and both nephews both went through times when un requested shows of affection were rebuffed sometimes quite forcefully!
He still loves you, just doesn't want the patting etc that you are doing right now.
Please step back and give him space - young children can be very verbal when something is happening that they don't want to happen - find something that you can both do together be it watching football, crafts, birdwatching etc !

Gosh he’s only six. Just step back a little bit and he will notice that your not giving him the attention and he will come round. Don’t worry it will be fine.

Back off! You are crowding him by pressing in on him. He is a "big boy" now, he doesn't want to be a cuddly baby and the centre of cloying attention. If you give him space and appear to be absorbed in doing something interesting, he will come to you. If you pursue him, he will move further away.

Have you ever met one of those people at an event who seems unable to sit more than 2 inches away from you, asks you an unremitting stream of questions about your family, work, leisure, house, holidays, and pats your arm at intervals? Don't you hate it? Make sure you are not that person! Even a 5-year-old has a right to his personal space, physical and mental.

Redhead56, yes, one of my granddaughters is visibly upset to see me on Zoom, now, so is excused from participating.

I've thanked them all for being so brave, staying indoors so long, missing school and their friends - all to protect us older ones from the nasty virus!

I have twin granddaughters I helped raise them for two years. I have only seen them brieftly from a distance occasionally the last year. When I see them now to drop off messages one never stops chatting to me the other hides from me or covers her face. It's upsetting but think it's because she misses me and I hope when life gets back to how it was things will improve. I am sure it's affected a lot of families in this way be hopeful and try not to dwell on it.

DGS is known to swerve round me as I come in the door and head for his grandpa. He only has one grandpa, the other died many years ago, so he is special.

Like others have said some children grow out of cuddles and hugs, but he and I will go down the garden later where he has is own personal little nature reserve and he will tell me all about the insects he has seen, the frogs in his pond, the bigger animals he has seen on his trail camera, just the two of us, one to one, and we bond quietly over that.

There is more to love than hugs and kisses. I am afraid that you to need to give yourself a good shake. Your sense of self-worth should be based on so much more than whether a 6 year old boy loves you. You should have the resilience and confidence to be able to accept the vagaries of small children.

My son never wanted kisses and cuddles after four and certainly didn’t kiss me between the ages of four to adulthood! Your grandson is growing up.

I know how you feel. My grandson is 6 and has stopped giving cuddles too. I've had to realise that he's getting bigger now and I've learnt to engage with him in a different way. Usually starwars and lego. He's teaching me all about starwars characters.
Try not to be upset, children are evolving all the time and we have to go with the flow.

Calendargirl

It sounds as if you enjoyed being the only one he wanted when he was younger. Now he’s older, things are different.

I agree Calendargirl time to give your grandson some space now fairyamma he is not a baby any more.

My step grandson never let me hug him, and hated his grandad to do it either. I told him ok but it was rude to ignore someone and insisted he shook hands. With me and anyone else it would affect. He accepted this, and it also taught him left from right :-)

It sounds as if you enjoyed being the only one he wanted when he was younger. Now he’s older, things are different.

Agree welbeck, it's a strange one. Hugging may not be welcomed, patting on the head is just not acceptable (he's not a pet dog) - and expecting full replies to questions, from a six year old?

Time, now, to step back and let him come to you (or not) as he likes. The only problem is how strongly you feel about it.

One of my GC in particular never liked hugs or 'good-night' kisses, she was like that with everyone too.

I agree with other comments, give the child some space and respect his wishes.

I agree with the others, you’re probably coming over as too needy.
Give the boy some space, some children just don’t like lots of physical affection. One of my granddaughters is like that, she says nobody can touch her without her permission.
As for going home and crying about it, that’s just total overreaction.

My grandson started to not want ‘Nan cuddles’ so I just made a joke of it and offered my hand to shake when we arrived or left. At one stage he was happy to give my husband a kiss and then my husband transferred the kiss to my cheek.

I have only seen my grandchildren twice in the past fifteen months but I know his older sister will be happy to give me a cuddle when it is safe.

Stand back, it sounds as if you are annoying him, perhaps he doesn't want to be patted and cuddled, some don't. Sorry to be blunt but you need to respect his boundries whatever age.

He’s 6 and he is growing up, stop fussing him and treat him as a person and not a baby.

i am not sure if this is entirely a genuine question.
it sounds odd to me. i may be wrong, what do others think.
if it is genuine, i would say you need to treat your GS as an individual with autonomy. he is not a toy to be hugged just because you want to do that.
there should be no physical expressions of emotion that is not fully consensual.
maybe he simply has grown beyond your fussing over him.
stand back. observe. be sensitive. he is a developing person, and does not exist to fulfil your emotional needs.
sorry if that sounds harsh. but the tone of your post sounds unhealthy to me.