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New grandparents

(11 Posts)
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62Granny Tue 14-Dec-21 19:25:38

AIBU Our DD is awaiting the birth of her first baby and our first GC , it is due next week. We are excited but I am not gushing , it is not my style, I like to keep things calm ,my SIL (DH sister) who my DD has a good relationship with is texting her daily , "is it here yet"? last week she was positive the baby would arrive last weekend? And got my DD all worked up, she is an all or nothing person and is estranged from her own GC. Is she trying to take over mine? My DD doesn't live near either of us so she won't have easy access. I am going to have give her a reminder on boundaries if it keeps up.

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Hithere Tue 14-Dec-21 20:12:19

62granny

How does your dd feel about this?

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MissAdventure Tue 14-Dec-21 20:16:51

Presumably your daughter will be able to stave off your sister? (With a chair, if necessary!)
Unless she is unable to, then I would leave it be.

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MissAdventure Tue 14-Dec-21 20:17:23

Ooops. Sister in law.

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Elizabeth27 Tue 14-Dec-21 20:29:55

Gushing is not your style but it is hers, we are all different. Being estranged from her own grandchildren may make her more interested than she may have ordinarily been but what does it matter, the more people that love the baby the better.

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welbeck Wed 15-Dec-21 00:06:36

why is she estranged.
was she behaving badly in relation to her own GC.
she might need to be warned off.
don't let her bother your Daughter's family.

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freedomfromthepast Wed 15-Dec-21 00:22:27

No one can speak to what her motivations are. New babies create excitement at a level that can make even the most level headed people seem irrational at times.

It is interesting that you mention that she is estranged from her own GC and then ask if she might be trying to take over yours. Why do you think that way? One of the things I have learned in all my years is that we women do have a sixth sense and I have never heard of a women not trusting her instinct.

Honestly, your daughter is an adult and needs to take care of this situation herself if it makes her uncomfortable. If your DD asks you to intervene, then you should.

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Hetty58 Wed 15-Dec-21 02:01:55

62Granny, it sounds like you're trying to control your SIL's natural behaviour. I'm sure that your daughter can cope with any over-enthusiasm, so it's really not your (potential) problem to solve.

It's not a competition. You don't have automatic priority or 'ownership rights' over your grandchild. In fact, you have no rights, so please don't have set expectations.

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CafeAuLait Wed 15-Dec-21 09:37:07

Nothing more annoying than sitting there, big and heavy and impatient to meet your baby, and having someone constantly asking if you've had the baby yet. Like you wouldn't have told them.

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Smileless2012 Wed 15-Dec-21 09:48:17

IMO unless your s.i.l. is unsettling your D and your D feels unable to set her own boundaries and asks you to do so on her behalf, you shouldn't say anything 62Granny.

You say she's estranged from her other GC, but as she's clearly not estranged from her son, your s.i.l., why is that even relevant?

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Smileless2012 Wed 15-Dec-21 09:54:01

Sorry, I've got that wrong. She's your H's sister isn't she, that said I still don't see why her being estranged from her GC is relevant.

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