Help Needed but How?

Would getting a Au Pair help although they would need a room of their own.
That way whoever it is learns better English and gets paid a salary.
Boundaries would need to be set as to what was expected

It sounds to me as if an Au pair might be the answer. We had a nanny until ours were both at school, then fortunately she got married and had her own baby so registered as a childminder to care for mine in the holidays. Once the oldest was 11 she moved to Australia and at that point we got an Au pair. It was a great success, she kept in touch with us for years after she had returned to Slovakia. Her role was mainly to be there for the children before and after school and to do a few domestic things like put washing on or do a little meal prep. We really benefited from her presence as she was really good company and loved doing art or making up games for tour sons. Worth a try.

Before and After school clubs are held at various schools, so might be an idea for her to enquire if there is one at the children's school.
Mothers' helps will make arrangements to drop children off , pick up from school and either take the children home and stay with them until parents return - perhaps your daughter could ask on her community Facebook group for recommendations or if anyone would be interested - they might have children of the same age but they must be passed by the council I believe if they will be paid.
Sometimes for after school, there might be a local trust worthy teenager that would "babysit" .
First choice should possibly be to find out if the working hours for both parents can be changed - either starting later or leaving earlier from work each day and then during the holidays, there are often holiday activity clubs that are available during the day.

An au pair who lives out?
After school club is good as is breakfast club! Children adapt to these hours as long as they are consistent ! There are plenty of holiday activity clubs as well !! The parents need to take a day off and sit down to make a plan which works for everybody including you as you are involved and concerned ?

A nanny /au pair is what they need I had one when my 3 were very young and she went on holiday with us, took the children to school/nursery did homework, some light household duties, gave them tea. If we had a function/going out she put them to bed/story etc. I credit Paula with having brought my children up very well while we were working. She left to get married when the youngest of the children was secondary school age and she started with me when she was 19.

My DS is a finance officer in a government department. He is based at home and can organise his day to pick up his children from school if required and prepare a meal for them. He will then work in the evening. Not ideal. I totally accept that this wouldn’t work for everyone. They have a cleaner which I feel is essential.

It is good of you to think about the problem but I expect they will sort themselves out, certainly breakfast clubs and after school clubs are a start, my daughter uses them. They should try for a cleaner, not easy to find I know.

I agree with Nannarose; the first thing should be employing a cleaner!

Has your daughter asked you to help find a solution? There are a lot of good ideas here, but no idea what would suit the family.

If they know the community well, they can ask around - my sons have earned money by going to a neighbour's home after school and looking after children until the parents come home. This is great for homework help (and they can be around in the holidays as well) and could do a simple tea as well. However they wouldn't do every day because of sports training.

I am surprised that they don't already have a cleaner, and think that the first thing so that you are free to be granny when you are there.

Au pairs can be great, but be very careful with the agencies, and it can be difficult to place someone outside of main towns and cities. And in those areas there are often students who could do this (many who have helped in youth organisations come with experience and DBS checks).

This may not suit at all - I suspect it won't - but we have a lovely family near us, with high achieving parents who have simply taken it in turn to be the full-time / part-time worker, swopping every few years.
They recently had 3 years of both working full-time as the older boy could care for the younger. However he is now at work, and they have had to re-group.

Hope you find something helpful

Sorry, 6pm!

Definitely after school clubs. Often they run til about 6pm and breakfast day club from 8am.

It's a long day, though, for an 8 year old, off to breakfast club at 8 am, school then after school club until 8 pm .

Definitely after school clubs. Often they run til about 6pm and breakfast day club from 8am.

I find that high flying jobs often have more flexibility available. I have a director who goes and does the school run for an hour from 3-4pm, and who finishes for the day at 3pm one day a week. His wife does similar but on different days to cover it. Another only work four days a week. Would that be an option? People don’t always want the drop in salary. I work compressed hours so I get a weekday off but my child is below school age. During school years I’ll probably do five short days.

And perhaps they could get a cleaner too and you could just spend some fun time with the children sometimes.

One of DD's friends went as a weekly boarder because his parents ran a business and he loved it. In fact, he asked to go but he had been a day pupil at the school for a while before that.

Thanks again everyone - I appreciate all your words of help.

Sago

Have the parents considered independent/public schools?
The school day is usually longer, includes extra curricular activities, supervised prep and an evening meal.

Or weekly boarding school?
Before anyone says "Too young" it would be no worse than having an au pair or an exhausted granny to look after them.
They'd be supervised, have prep time, activities, friends and could come home at weekends.

Miss Chateline - that sounds a very good example for her x thank you

Thanks for the link Monica - they are both more than capable but have only just started thinking about it as they have a lot going on right now so I’m just trying to help.

In the US, there is the concept of mother's helper.

Also, I would find out what the school offers, before and after.

Some gyms also offer after school programs.

My daughter looks after her friends children after school and in the holidays. The friend is in a high flyer job and pays well. All the children get social inter action, little time on screens like you dislike. The friends kids go to a breakfast club early in the morning. There is lots out there.

My daughter and her husband are in a similar situation. They both work long hours both from home and the office. They have a 3rd floor with an en-suite bathroom. They have had an au pair arrangement for a few years. There were a few teething problems at the start but their latest au pair has been with them for several years and is a big part of the family. she takes the children to school, they plan meals together and she cooks tea for the children and dinner for my daughter. She does the laundry and tidies up. There is also a weekly cleaner and supermarket deliveries. She has the Weekends off and she goes back to Italy to see her family when convenient. My daughter pays well as she totally appreciates the input by the au pair and she pays for her flights as well as her pension contributions. She is included in all family events if she wants to join in. I know that this is not for everyone but for our high flying career children this has been the best solution.

Sorry Lathyrus accidentally referenced your post!

Lathyrus

Trouble is, that’s the sort of job that doesn’t pay very well because it’s few hours in total. But it disrupts the day for anything else.

Probably only a stay-at-home mum who needs some extra income would consider it.

They would be wise to consider the person is insured, DBS checked and has some first aid training. Our local Facebook seems to have some people, rather like childminders, but with older children.

Thanks all of you. Shorten hours…. No not an option DiscoDancer1975 - thanks for your kind words though and I absolutely know I can’t overdo it, I know my limits. Some sort of Au Pair Grandma KT - yes possibly, I guess there must be reputable agencies for help of this kind. MissAdventure - yes a sort of Nanny but difficult hours to fill and I feel this would have been easier when they were younger but of course they couldn’t have afforded it then .

Have the parents considered independent/public schools?
The school day is usually longer, includes extra curricular activities, supervised prep and an evening meal.