Stories of birth

My Mum told me that when she gave birth to my brother in 1948 at home there was no pain relief. The District Nurse was in attendance and tied a towel around the metal rails on the bedhead and Mum had to squeeze and twist it as the pains got worse. It was the same for my birth a few years later but I think by the time another brother came along in 1956 there was a bit of pain relief.

I only told them how easy they were to give birth to. Shortest labout 45 minutes and longest 3.5 hours. No pain meds needed, it was just a balance to some of the horror stories they had heard.

I was born at home 49 years ago (50 in January!) Last of 4 girls, apparently mum said, "babies coming" 15 minutes later I was born! Had to go to hospital though soon after, apparently I had jaundice and spent time under a lamp.

My first delivery was largely uneventful. 2 hours later a nurse came to check I was okay and I was lying in a huge pool of blood. I was hurriedly transfer ed to the local Maternity hospital ( my daughter was born in the GP run hospital). 12 hours later I was taken to theatre and a large internal tear was repaired. And I required 3 pints of blood. I didn't get to see my baby for 2 days as she was kept in the nursery. My second bort was uneventful and I was home in 48 hours.

I have a concern about this thread.

Mines always open to discussion, my family think it was hilarious that been autistic I felt no pain (total different perception of pain as many) and because of that the midwife wouldn't believe me when I said I was in labour. She delayed and kept saying I'd know when I was (I did know, I just didn't feel the pain she wanted me to) the doctor came into examine me while I was playing on Facebook games. He confirmed I was 9 1/2 centimetres dilated, which I then updated via Facebook. Which family believed it was my husband at first. Then the doctor told me to push and didn't get a reaction and was shocked to realise I was still on Facebook.

My mother told me several times that mine was a difficult birth. It was in a post-war maternity home. I was born with the cord around my neck and my mother was 'very ill' for some three weeks afterwards so I was kept in another room and looked after by the staff. She never had another child - probably the experience put her off for life. What 'very ill' meant she never elaborated.

My mum told me I was 'forceps delivery' and one of my sisters was born in an ambulance in a snowstorm where it was struggling to get to the hospital in time.
My 3 children were all born in 2 hours from my first sign of labour to delivery. Apparently I didn't feel the first stage with any of them, and slept through it.
My children have never asked about it though.

Three children, three different births. No. 1, I had pre-eclampsia very badly and was in hospital for weeks before the birth. I almost died, baby almost died, born at 28 weeks. Second one ‘normal’ hospital delivery, 36-hour labour, 9lb baby. Third one, born in the ambulance on way to hospital 100 miles away! I’ve often told them all about their births, whether they want to know or not!

Only the amusing bits - such as going to the cinema when I was a week overdue and coming back home with a new baby brother for my 18 month old daughter, who never trusted our evenings out after that. My husband (a good Yorkshire man) insisted that we saw the end of the film before going to the hospital. My son (now in his 40s) still loves film.

I knew much of the detail about my own and my siblings’ births, and my sons knew very early about theirs. Unfortunately, I forgot to tell them soon enough that not all babies were born by Caesarean, resulting in my 6 year old hugely entertaining his pregnant teacher with an explanation of what to expect…

Interesting question. I’ve only ever spoken about it to my daughter as she’s asked. My son never showed any interest about his birth but my daughter is interested in both, particularly how awful women could be treated and spoken to back then, 1975 and 1981. I asked to see the afterbirth after my first (normal) birth. I was fascinated by what had kept this little baby alive, there was no google then of course. The midwife said ‘Why? You’ll be wanting to take it home for the Sunday gravy next’ and wouldn’t show me. She also wouldn’t allow me to go on ‘all fours’ as I was feeling the need quite desperately when pushing, but was made to stay lying down. I’m glad those days are over and women have a say in the way they wish to give birth wherever possible; AND that’s it’s no longer acceptable to be rude and sarcastic to people (though I know it can still happen, but professionals are more accountable now). Also, for both births, the nurses running around my very good looking husband like flies, getting him tea and toast, and biscuits and regularly checking he was feeling ok was quite incredulous given I was the one doing the work. Good old days eh?

@NotSpaghetti many still are!

A very interesting question. As a doula I find that most pregnant women have some sort of family birth story which they often cling to as a predictor of what their own experience will be like.
The most unhelpful thing is when mothers hand down fear and trauma - usually without meaning any harm.

Funnily enough, It was my son's birthday on 1st November and a bunch of went out to dinner.. he is 36. We have often joked about his birth over the years.
Back then, we didnt have a phone in the house so my (ex) husband had to go to the telephone box at the end of the road. At around 9.45pm I asked him to go to the phone box to call an ambulance - we werent allowed to take our own car as we would have to drive around 25 miles to the city. His response
"Yeah ok, after Match of the Day"
He eventually went to the phone box and the ambulance came and drove like a bat out of hell to the hospital - we got there at about 11:50 and my son was born at 12:05 - Phew!

Yes, I have tild my three daughters about their births. The oldest is child-free by choice but the younger two have two and three children, respectively, so it didn't put them off.

My mum never said a word until after I had my first baby. She then told me the horrific events surrounding my birth which was really upsetting. She suffered the results the rest of her life and in old age made me feel guilty. Consequently I have said little but my two daughters know my son’s birth was difficult as I was in hospital for six weeks beforehand. He knows he and I had a rough start but that is all.

One of my grandchildren had a first baby that took 30 minutes from start to finish, no stitches and lucky for her she was at the hospital for a check up! None of mine were that easy but she was only 18 so I suppose that helps. She has 3 now and none of them were more than an hour from start to finish. Lucky, lucky lady.

My mother-in-law was the first mother to have the father present at the birth (in that hospital) and although she didn't write it she contributed to a newspaper article about having him with her and they had photos taken.

Farmor15

My mother told me about my birth and also wrote about it in an article for a newspaper! She had got interested in "painless" childbirth (emphasis on relaxation and breathing) which was becoming popular in the early 1950s and wanted to share her experience.
I think my birth must have been relatively fast and easy. Interestingly my own 5 were easy births and both daughters also had fairly rapid labours. One grandchild has already been told the story of his birth as he was born on bedroom floor, delivered by his dad- not a planned home birth!

My mother was involved in this "movement" too and took antenatal classes in relaxation, breathing and later self-hypnosis. They were a small group of women working with a consultant who believed a more relaxed birth was better for both mother and baby.

My DM loved to tell us about our births. I was #2 girl and she was so disappointed that I wasn't a boy, she cried. My father allegedly said "never mind we can always try again" and "this is the one who will look after you in your old age!"
DM also said she'd been unconscious and when she came round, the midwife brought me to her all cleaned up. My hair combed into a single curl.

My own DC never seemed very interested in their births though I told them anyway!
DS, who was born at home, likes to take his own DC to show them the house.
DD loves the story that her dad picked flowers from the garden it was December to bring me in hospital. She now has that rose in her own garden grown from a cutting.

DS2 was born in a snowstorm with difficulty making it to hospital and home again. Now he lives in NZ so has Summer birthdays.

One DGC was born in the hospital lift. That must have been traumatic.

it was a bit like an old time comedy farce at times

GrannyGravy DC3 knows about her birth because it ended up like a Carry On film; we were in hospital but she was delivered by her father because there were no staff around.
When he went out and yelled for help they rushed in like Hattie Jacques, Kenneth Williams and Barbara Windsor.
With a touch of Victor Meldrew "I don't belieeeve it"!

My three birth experiences were all rather traumatic.

I was about to have a D&C after a suspected miscarriage, my last pregnancy
There was no available bed and I was sent to the local maternity hospital instead, where after a scan ( unusual in those days) , it was found I was still pregnant with my daughter. I could never share that with her. It was a very close call.

Mine have never asked and my mum has never told me

I have no daughters my two both sons
I have told them they were both born by caesarean section and they have never asked why etc so I have bot told them anymore
My DS1 is still unaware that he and I almost died during his birth , and both unaware they were were bought out more dead than alive and needed resuscitating
I only got pregnant with DS2 because I badly wanted a girl, but after another very traumatic birth I decided this is the last.Now DS2 is the father of four daughters so I got my girls!