DIL posh family - advice needed

I caught an interesting programme on R4 some time ago in which Laurie Taylor discussed the role of corridors in life and in literature. It’s on the Sounds app if anyone is interested- just search under Laurie T and corridors. Anyway, there was mention of how modern regulations don’t give people as much ‘neutral’ space as before, so we spend more time in areas with designated purposes, whether at home or in workplaces or municipal buildings, which gives us less time for gathering thoughts and psychological ‘resetting’. Modern houses often don’t have hallways or corridor-style landings that separate rooms, and offices are often open plan, so people are ‘always on’, which has an impact on anxiety and so on. I don’t remember all the detail, but it was interesting.

Modern homes have great open spaces to hide the fact that they are smaller than similar houses built 30 or more years ago. Were they to put walls and doors in it would show just how small they are.

It is also not easy to control heating in these big open rooms, you cannot limit the area that has full heating. Every room in our house has a thermostatic radiator valve, that means that each room downstairs is set at a differetn temperature accordingto whether it is being used or not.

Germanshepherdsmum

The fashion with new builds seems to be a completely open plan kitchen, dining area and living area, no partitions at all. I can’t imagine sitting for the evening virtually amongst the kitchen cupboards and with lingering cooking smells.

The extractor takes care of smells, which are of foods we love anyway. The cupboards aren't among the dining table/ chairs or following sofas areas or further following children's play spaces and library. Our kitchen work spaces end, full stop, no extraneous kitchen cupboards mixed in with the furniture.

I agree, open may not be for everyone, just as doors are not for us.

We've a lovely set of beautiful double doors from the kitchen to the mostly unused, old fashioned dining hall, living room, and foyer.

Who ever has time to sit long with dogs and children?

I can’t imagine sitting for the evening virtually amongst the kitchen cupboards and with lingering cooking smells.

No I wouldn't like that either, and we don't.
It's the extra light we benefit from, and why I had the work done.
Previously our lounge was quite gloomy and I realised I hardly used it. Now I actually get to enjoy my nice sofas, big television, and the view of the back garden, all at the same time!

The fashion with new builds seems to be a completely open plan kitchen, dining area and living area, no partitions at all. I can’t imagine sitting for the evening virtually amongst the kitchen cupboards and with lingering cooking smells.

Our main home has a living room, dining room, study/snug and a small sitting room at the back of the house.
We tend to use every room but the heating costs are eye watering, we light a fire at weekends and hunker down in the sitting room and let the rest of the house remain cold!

We are currently staying at our holiday apartment, it’s an open plan converted chapel, we had to open windows on Friday as we were too warm as the sun floods the building.
Since Wednesday we have only had the heating on for around 4 hours!

I am loving living with what you need in a warm place rather than a cold house full of stuff we have collected and inherited.

I wish my husband felt the same, he’s not ready to downsize.

Parties? Large family gatherings, parties after a Christening, a wake, a special birthday, a Halloweeen party, even an adult party (with a Dirty Dancing theme!), our houses have accommodated them all. Sometimes, if the weather was fine, we used the garden, and had barbecues.
A house doesn't need to be huge to have a party. It's the guests that matter, the atmosphere and the nosh!

We must be unusual. Never had a party in our house - and I don't think I've ever been to one in someone else's house either.

When DH was emptying the dishwasher I was glad to retreat to the sitting room.
How can plates and cutlery make so much noise?

I hate open plans. Too much trauma growing up, I need walls so there’s a directed flow of traffic, a wall to put my back to.

Doodledog

Yes, I prefer separate rooms too. I don’t want ‘social space’, unless I’m having a party (rare these days). I want somewhere I can have peace and quiet, or where I can watch tv or listen to music without worrying about someone else’s need for peace and quiet. I also value my privacy, so would have found family life in one large space stressful, as, I’m sure, would my children.

Each to her own though. There’s no right or wrong, just preferences.

I can't abide interior doors, apart from bedrooms, offices.

The front half of our home, dining hall, living room, foyer are connected by wide openings to usable space, no doors (same to the back half of our home). We're happy with our open situation, even as we introverts have small noisy children and daughters round most days for short times.

Funny how people are so different.

Our house opens up nicely for parties. I have a big family party(20-30 people) every summer and there are days when it rains and we are stuck indoors but with food in one room, drink in another, a large central hall, people wander around and because we are not in one big room, noise levels are low in every room. Quite useful when nearly everyone present is over 70 and some are beginning to have hearing problmes.

That sounds nice Norah.
Actually I think you could get a job as an estate agent writing room descriptions. Some of their attempts are rubbish!

Yes, I prefer separate rooms too. I don’t want ‘social space’, unless I’m having a party (rare these days). I want somewhere I can have peace and quiet, or where I can watch tv or listen to music without worrying about someone else’s need for peace and quiet. I also value my privacy, so would have found family life in one large space stressful, as, I’m sure, would my children.

Each to her own though. There’s no right or wrong, just preferences.

Doodledog wrote What do people call the currently fashionable open plan areas? They aren't 'rooms', but zones, really. Maybe the idea of a sitting room, a dining room and a kitchen will die out altogether if the trend continues, and the terminology with it? I'm told that open plan is on the way out because of the cost of heating though.

In California open plan living areas are called the great room/hall. My son’s IL’s have one. It’s nice in one way, in that people are all bimbling around together but otoh, if one person wants to listen to music or watch TV, everyone has to. Also, there’s nowhere to be private unless you go to a bedroom. At least they have the Californian weather so you can outside to get away from everyone else.

Our neighbours knocked through their living area into their kitchen and really regretted it. For some weird reason, it made their house colder and their heating bills rocketed (pre-COL crisis). I guess open plan may not work so well in older homes in Scotland!

Joseann

I think there is currently something called "broken plan" living, which has evolved from open plan living. As Norah and Doodledog say, you basically break the space up into areas or zones using bookshelves or open display units. That's why IKEA is so popular.

Not exactly, I undoubtedly explained 'the kitchen' poorly.

Ours is a long space on the back side of the house - from the side entrance (not including the loo/ dog room with doors). Fireplace, cased opening, into the kitchen with islands, table/chairs, appliances etc. Next a 14 ft wide case, then the couches, tables/chairs, TV etc. Then another 14ft wide opening into children's toys, library, TV, couches, chairs etc. Fireplace.

A lovely old door opens, near fireplace, into bedrooms area.

The casements enclose wall supports and electricals - but don't provide zones or displays. I know what you are speaking of, but we have an old home, nothing fancy or modern, no IKEA - old brown wood (or painted wood).

My preference is and will always be for separate rooms for separate functions. I like a house to 'flow. We have a large hal/recepton room and everything opens off it, but each can have the door shut, to stop cooking smells pervading the house, to enable anyone wanting a quiet space to work to cut themselves off, or to keep the heat from the stove in the living room so that it doesn't confuse the sensors on the central heating controls.

Re: open plan rooms... we had the wall between our kitchen-diner (across the back of the house) and our lounge (at the front of the house) knocked through so now our main downstairs room is one big L shape.

From the hall we enter via the kitchen, at the end of the short arm of the L.
The dining room is the lower half of the upright and the lounge is the top half of the upright.
One of the two sofas sits partway across the room between these two areas to divide the space.
(The integral garage takes up the rest of the rectangular floor space of the house).

Sitting in the lounge you cannot see the kitchen, but you can now see the back garden.
This was my aim as the view from the lounge previously was of our drive and the brick wall at the top of the cul-de-sac, so not very scenic!

A big advantage now is having windows each end: previously one room would always be sunny and the other one dark, and vice-versa as the sun went round.
Another benefit is it's easy to adapt the space eg to extend the dining table if we need to.

The playroom, my office and the laundry are in similar areas of the second room which used to be a big conservatory.
This runs across the width of the back of the house behind the kitchen, ie below the short arm of the L.

I love it, it's a very sociable use of all the space 🙂

I think there is currently something called "broken plan" living, which has evolved from open plan living. As Norah and Doodledog say, you basically break the space up into areas or zones using bookshelves or open display units. That's why IKEA is so popular.

Doodledog What do people call the currently fashionable open plan areas? They aren't 'rooms', but zones, really. Maybe the idea of a sitting room, a dining room and a kitchen will die out altogether if the trend continues, and the terminology with it?

We added along the entire back of our quite old home - extending from the side entrance/laundry and kitchen to the far end bedrooms. It's a large open space with cased openings along the segments - fireplace, appliances, worktop, 2 islands, many grouped tables, chairs, couches, playroom/space for GC. It's called 'the kitchen' though one granddaughter calls it 'the gathering space' (?)

Enough now Joseann! I think Silverberry, (7 days on and no comment), will have realised how trivial worrying about the wrong use of a word can be.
Adieu.

👍

I use the dog! He is both upholstered and has legs!

A foot stool and pouffe are diffeent things. A footstool has visible legs, a pouffe is entirely upholstered. At least that is how they were differentiaated when i grew up.

Sadly, Joseann it looks as though that drawing room is now just an office... 😕
Doesn't even look like a study.

Joseann

He he. What kind of visitors?. That sounds a bit suspect.
Talking of board games, why is there no drawing room in Cluedo? The Colonel, Professor, Reverend etc all sound very posh.

I was thinking of scattered families and friends, Joseann.