"Grandparenting " course, would you go? ?

I brought up three children. I haven't forgotten how!

No nuts or peanut butter now, before a certain age.
Grapes, cut in half rather than whole.
Sleep positions change all the time, and it seems swaddling is back.
That was a huge no-no when I had my girl.
Baby lead weaning - no idea about that except to say I have heard of babies gagging and regurgitating the food they've chosen.
"Kind hands" instead of smacking.
No pate, no cream cheese..

no one can train you for these things if it’s not in you already some ppl love kids and some don’t. I had a neighbor who was horrified when she found out she was going to be a grandparent even now the child doesn’t have a bond with her. Her son was brought up with his dad and stepmom and they adore the child. Before I moved she used to hate my lot visiting but like I said you live in a house you expect to see kids

I think everyone is in the same page when the GP AC relationship works over GC but sometimes things do get out of sync so there is a need for guidance in handling tricky stuff when either side becomes defensive and barriers go up. First aid training is a good idea.

Cossy lots of babies survived with the different advice we were given but an awful lot of babies didn't compared to the advice given today.
I also had my babies widely spaced at 23, 30 and 39 and you're right, the changes in advice were phenomenal but even thought I wondered if the changes were really that important, I would never have forgiven myself if I hadn't followed the advice and something had happened to my baby. It would be even more devastating if it happened to my grandchild because those decisions are not mine to make.
I know several babies who have died with the causes being given as SIDs. The ripple effects across those families have been tragic. My DIL lost her brother when she was 5 and it still affects her today. My aunt will have her SIDs baby's name carved across her heart when she dies; she is in her 80's and lost her beloved little girl in her 20's.

I thinks it’s “interesting” how trends change! I had baby number one at 26, next one at 39, one at 42 and final one at 44 🫣🫣🫣 (yes I was mad!)

The changes between Baby one and number four were phenomenal, as was the new advice/guidelines. The ily things I really took on board was being slightly more careful about what I ate and drank whilst pregnant and sleeping (for cot death more than anything) I didn’t do baby led weaning and they all had solids way before 6 months as they were hungry, many baby yogurts, mashed bananas and stewed apple.

Guess what? All survived and a pretty fit and healthy!

M0nica

I think if you need lessons on being a grandparent, then you probably already have a dysfunctional relationship with your AC and their partners.

There is no guarantee that what is taught in grandparenting classes will accord with your children's decisions about how their children will be brought up anyway. So they could cause more trouble than they alleviate.

I also doubt whether the grandmothers from hell, we sometimes get on GN demanding we support ttheir gross interference in their DGC's lives would take any notice of anything said in a grandparenting class.

I completely agree and it also made me smile

Simply answer, no (thank-you)

'Rules' change. My baby daughters slept on their tummies at the top of the cot. The rule now is for babies to sleep on their backs at the bottom of the cot.

No to the grandparenting course, yes to the first aid course.

Having worked in childcare mainly pre school children and babies, this is something that's not for me but.... courses that teach 1st aid to help save the life's of babies and children would be beneficial, I've renewed my paediatric 1st aid every 3 years, which is always good to refresh, and any updates/new things to do/learn

I would happily attend to update myself on the changed advice. Safeguarding Officers, Teachers, Doctors, Gas Engineers, Electricians, Nursery Workers, etc are continually taking update courses. Why should being a Grandparent any different when it comes to learning. If it reassured my adult children too, I'd go just to put their mind at rest.

Anybody who doesn't look back at their parenting and consider they may have made some mistakes seems to be quite arrogant to me. Nobody is perfect and there is always room for improvement.

I agree with Mollygo its the younger people need the lessons.

🤣😂😅

I've now read the article and was surprised how apologetic the young lady is for her generation. It made me smile in a few places, particularly when she referred to them as "grantenatal classes".

I’d do it without blinking. Knowledge is always good, imo. Be it safety issues changing or whatever, why wouldn’t I want to be as prepared to help my kids if asked, as I could be?

I don’t understand why people sound so insulted by the thought, honestly. There’s no job I can think of that hasn’t changed on the last 20+ years. Why wouldn’t parenting, safety things, and such have altered as well?

A discussion group for young parents and their parents would perhaps be a good idea. There are so many ways to handle babies these days. There are also many things to think about. Both from the practical side and the attitude to each other and the shift in relationships that inevitably arise. Young parents might listen to someone else's mother telling them what it used to be like. The new grandparents can learn about the new thinking on all sorts of topics. The group can then discuss and compare the new and the old ways in a more detached way. This would lead to a better understanding between the generations.

Probably impossible to implement but it sounds a good idea in theory.

No, I wouldn't go, it may sound big headed but i am proud of myself for being the grandma that i am.

🤗 ❤

I suppose I'd do it, were it necessary, but I wouldn't enjoy it..

Callistemon21

^I did have to bite my tongue (and keep control of my eyebrows) quite a lot when youngest GC was born but simply because my own thinking was out of date^.
Oh yes!!

I think the worst instruction was to keep them awake after they dropped a day-time nap - apparently even two minutes resulted in one DGC in particular finding a second wind until about 10pm!

Oh yes. We used to take the twins to Jiggy Wrigglers every Friday morning when they were little. This was to give mum a morning ‘off’ as we looked after the twins when she was working anyway. The instruction was don’t let them fall asleep in the car on the way home otherwise they won’t sleep at nap time after lunch.
Seriously? Have you ever tried to keep not one, but two babies awake, in the car, after a morning’s activity, about an hour before their nap time? We did our best. Grandad drove and I nearly put my neck out I swear that’s the source of all my current neck pain troubles whilst simultaneously turning around to pull funny faces, play finger games, sing a variety of songs, and call their names loudly, and if all else failed, virtually climb over the seat to poke or tickle them! From experience I can tell you it’s not an easy job, and actually I think I deserve a medal for my efforts. It mostly worked and we delivered two hungry and tired babies back into the arms of their mother, and escaped quickly for our own lunch and a bit of peace and quiet.

If I were asked to attend, I likely would.

We've 4 children, 8 GC - never been asked, but none were particularly nervous new mums either. Some are. Methods change. I'm not so proud assuming I know everything, I'd go - learn advances in childcare.

I typically do as people ask if it's reasonable, logical to me, and will stop any potential arguments - learning is always good, imo.

This was another sentence in the article that had me thinking 'yes':
. It’s not the babies they need to learn how to nurture, it’s this tricky new relationship with their child.

Not, I want to add, that the new relationship with my own adult children and their partners was particularly difficult, as it wasn't, but because of the innumerable threads I have read on Mumsnet and an increasing number here here on Gransnet where it seems that grandparents, particularly on the paternal side, can't do right for doing wrong, as the saying goes, when it comes to grandparenting. For example, they are damned if they want regular involvement, and they are damned if they don't, and so on ...

I have no idea if my children realized at the pregnancy-planning stage that they would need me to do childcare, or if that didn't occur to them until halfway through maternity leave. Either way, it certainly hadn't been on my radar, and the fact that I would have to give up on of my jobs seemed irrelevant to them when this need was finally voiced.

Anyway, I agreed. More fool me, some will say, but that isn't particularly relevant.

When I took on the childcare, my sons and dils made me aware of what parenting advice had changed since they were born, so I doubt that classes would have made any difference. Personally, I tried to follow their guidance to the letter, but if I had been the sort of person to ignore it, I probably wouldn't would have been the sort of person to attend classes either!

As others have said, there is something to be said for doing a course if you need a confidence boost, and a first-aid/resuscitation course can give you skills that could help in many scenarios, but beyond that, I thing grandparenting classes are more of a money spinner than a necessity.

SueDonim

Callistemon with my own dc I swear one minute’s sleep after 3pm = one extra hour of them rampaging round of an evening. 😫 😂

Yes, one of mine was like that too, funnily enough not the parent of the DGD who did the same. She must be more like her aunt than her daddy.

I'd go to cook her dinner then find her on the sofa, eyes drooping 😴

Callistemon with my own dc I swear one minute’s sleep after 3pm = one extra hour of them rampaging round of an evening. 😫 😂

Certainly NOT