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Grandparenting

Premature granddaughter - worried about progress

(16 Posts)
NanaSuzy Wed 18-May-22 13:18:46

Hi, I've not been on here for a while. Our grandaughter was born at 32 weeks. She is now about 20 months old from her actual date of birth. She is only just struggling to stand and collapses after a couple of steps. Plus she has no words yet. What do people think, is it time to worry?

Hithere Wed 18-May-22 13:51:38

Babies reach out milestones at different times
Premature or not, please do not let your worry be an added layer of concern for the parents of the child.

MissAdventure Wed 18-May-22 13:54:57

All children when they're learning to walk bump down to sit after a few steps.
Collapsing is a whole different situation.
It all sounds well within the normal range, so it isn't time to worry unduly, I'd say.

Hetty58 Wed 18-May-22 14:09:11

As she's only 18 months from her due date, it seems quite normal to me. There's a wide variation in when they reach their milestones. One of mine was toddling about at nine months, another said nothing, not a word, until he was two. Then he surprised us all by producing complete sentences!

paddyann54 Wed 18-May-22 14:12:33

I wouldn't worry ,she'll be seeing medical support at her GP surgery I would think .They'll pick up anything that might be a problem.
My son was born at 27 weeks and four days ,he was a very poor eater and at 18 months weighed just 16 pounds .He took his first step at 16 months ,speech was slow too .
By the time he went to school ,although he was still small for his age he had caught up in the other ways .
He's 34 now and the Dad of 2 beautiful daughters age 12 and 2 .I know its easy to say dont worry I spent his forst 3 months by a cot in SCBU and it took a long time to relax a wee bit with him .Your GD will catch up,its not a competition ,all children reach milestones at different times .Just enjoy her and let her do it in her own time.

NanaSuzy Wed 18-May-22 14:25:19

Thanks everyone

Shelflife Wed 18-May-22 15:03:35

I feel sure if there was any thing amiss it would be picked up at the usual assessments. My son was not born early but didn't sit up for ages! He didn't walk till he was 19 months old, didn't crawl either!!!! One afternoon he struggled to his feet and tottered unaided across the sitting room , I was flabbergasted! I did worry about the fact he didn't crawl both daughters did and I was concerned. He is in his mid 40s now , a strong and healthy and happy man .

M0nica Wed 18-May-22 15:26:51

Like others I think as she is only 18 months from her due date, you shouldn't worry.

Premature babies are frequently slow in reaching their expected milestones.I am sure she is under the care of a paediatrician who will be monitoring progress and will know when to take action if any is needed.

paddyann54 Wed 18-May-22 16:02:02

I think you have to remember that the first few moths are just catching up on how they would have been if they had gone full term

agnurse Wed 18-May-22 20:17:43

With a child that age we adjust for gestational age, as others have done. This sounds to be largely normal for an 18-month-old. I'd recommend just speaking to her as much as you can. This will encourage her to speak. But don't force her to talk.

pinkprincess Wed 18-May-22 20:50:36

I have a granddaughter born at 30weeks.She was very ill when first born, did not ''do anything'' until 6 months old, in fact her parents were told she had possible brain damage.
She suddenly started to smile and take notice of everything, although slow at sitting upas she could not support her head.
Then just after her first birthday she started to pull herself up and walk, began to make words and do everything she should be doing for her age.
Two of my other grandchildren, born full term never started walking until 22 months old, one walking on her knees from 12 months.Their father, my DS2 was the same.
My premature granddaughter is nearly 26 now and no problems.

Bungle Fri 20-May-22 09:20:45

Hi there, just wondering what other grandparents do/think. I have my granddaughter 2 days a week. She's 3 now and have had her since she was 9 months.
She's really testing the boundaries now with her behaviour and I'm finding it very difficult to be firm with her as it upsets me when she gets upset.
I wasn't like this with my children, I found it quite easy to set rules and stick to them. It didn't seem to upset me to the same degree if they then became a bit upset by the rule.
I don't want to make her behaviour more challenging by not dealing with it properly, but also don't want her to not like coming to Nannie's house.

Bungle Fri 20-May-22 09:36:40

Sorry I didn't mean to put this on here. 🙄. Apogies

ElaineI Sun 22-May-22 00:42:29

DGS1 was born at 31 weeks. You go by gestational age rather than actual age till about 2 when there is usually a check by paediatrician that milestones are being reached. She sounds fine for 20 months (corrected 18). DGS1 is now 8 and achieving well at school and properly into football! She will get there.
Bungle - that is very normal for a 3 and 4 year old. I agree it is more difficult with your grandchild. I find that too though both DDs are very supportive of how we deal with boundary testing and we all try to follow similar steps - deflection if possible, or carry on with your routine. Works with said 8yo too - eg. "I'm not going to school today" DD " Ok that's fine. Your sister and I are leaving in 5 minutes." DD and sister leave house - few minutes later 8yo rushes out fully dressed with bag, locks door and catches up, strop finished about halfway to school.. DGS2 (4) is also easily deflected and comes for a cuddle after a meltdown. DGD (5) less so - I think girls are more determined and questioning " Why are you asking me what I want if you are just going to give it to me anyway?" " Why is brother allowed to go in for friends and not me because friend lives round the corner and I don't even have to cross a road?" And she never stops talking! I do follow more or less what Mummy's rules are though

nanna8 Sun 22-May-22 01:05:18

My granddaughter was born at 27 weeks and weighed just 2lbs. It was touch and go for a while. She was always small for her age until she was around 7 years old. Now she is 17, top of all her subjects, outgoing and sporty. She will never be a big girl as she has a small appetite but out of their family she was the only one who didn’t get Covid . I wouldn’t worry about the so called milestones and expectations, they are only a guide. Her sister was 2 before she walked and is now a ballet dancer and very loose limbed. She can do the splits and is very energetic. Sometimes they are just cautious about walking and are frightened of falling, and sometimes they have sisters who fetch them toys so they don’t bother to walk!

NanaSuzy Sun 22-May-22 12:46:58

All your many replies are much appreciated and also v. reassuring, thank you all so much. Our little DGD2 is the happiest child you could imagine, and adores her big sister who's 6.