prolapse surgery and pessaries

*I mean't heal not help in last paragraph

*heal not help in last paragraph

meisha82.....good luck to you and your recovery! All I know is that taking it easy after such surgery is VITAL. The last thing you want is for the repair to fail. My doctor was telling me that all you should lift for the first month is a cup of coffee.

Hi meisha82 it sounds to me like you are doing far to much I wasnt in bed after my 2ops but did very little my hubby did most things.I know its difficult with children, Ithink alot depends on how strong your pelvic tissue is even though I was careful and felt fine for around 8-10 weeks after both surgerys its still comeback and facing more on the 28th aug. So please take care and be kind to yourself I think we are all guilty of doing things because we feel ok and want to be back to normal. Best wishes to you.xxx

Only lift a cup of coffee? I've lifted way heavier than that so hopefully theres no long-term damage done.

Nikrap are you off to have your 3rd lot of surgery?? I couldn't cope with that? how badly do you need to have it done if you mind me asking? can you live with it the way it is now?

My story if you can feel bothered reading...

Even though we love our kids more than anything in this world I now think having natural births causes looseness & prolapses to most women.

I had no idea I had any type of prolapse at first, I didn't even know there was such a thing. i knew I couldn't empty my bladder 100% after our second child but that didn't bother me really, infact I didn't even think about it until I was sitting in my doctors office 6 months ago asking for Vagina tightening for tighter sex (sorry to be so graphic lol but its important especially for husbands). She replied I couldn't get that type of surgery done free unless I had a health symptom in the same area that could be fixed at the same time. So at that moment I remembered my very minor bladder problem and she put the referral in to see the gyno.

4 months later... I was at the out patients area in the hospital sitting in the examination room with my gyno. I explained I needed tightenng after having kids and he replied 'I can only do V tightening if you have a bulge, its like a lump'. I responded a little confused 'what lump? do you mean cancer? I don't think I have that'. He did a examination and told me I had bulges front & back, describing what they were...A prolapse, not cancer! I WAS SO SHOCKED THIS CAN EVEN HAPPEN TO ANY FEMALE BODY AFTER KIDS! I couldn't get over this fact. I must of been naive assuming organs stayed in their correct places their whole lives. At the same time it explained why I had little minor bladder trouble. I booked surgery in for 1 month later & left...

The day before surgery... I was freaking out even though I was diagnosed with prolapse it didn't bother me. I kept thinking should I just be doing this for my sex life or not. Was very confused and kept changing my mind driving my hubi crazy with the way I was acting...

22nd July the day of surgery... Very stressed & unsure if I was needing the surgery done or not. Kept changing my mind still and asking hubi if I should do it or not. At the hospital hubi was very supportive & waited with me for a whole 4 hours before I went into theatre.

That evening apart from being tied to the bed with tubes etc I was uncomfortable but the pain wasn't bad at all. I had insomnia & bored out of my brain staring at the wall but was ok.

Fast forward 9 days later...

31st July

I started getting a little sore yesterday and still am today probably from bending down 1000's times helping my little ones get dressed etc since I got out of hospital. I had a serious talk with Hubi last night explaining if I can't rest and keep having to look after kids I will have to go stay at my dads house for 2-3 weeks. I think that was a wakeup call for him because since last night hes all of sudden started running to me every few hours asking if I need anything, filling up my water jug, made me breakfast and before the kids left for kindy this morning all I had to to was brush their hair!! Hopefully he can keep this up as hes staying up until 2am or 3am in the morning working from home on the computer so feel sorry for him too. I'm ok walking round 1 or 2 hours each day at home but not bending down.

The way I feel...It would have been so much wiser of me to have made this decision to get this done when kids are older. regrete that now but oh well.

Has it worked??

Back passage- no change. never had any problem with it anyway and being vegan helps. Even if your not vegan try change to high iron healthy vegan diet for 1 month after op so you don't get constipated and take bowl support vitamins. (lots of vegan recipes are online) .

Vagina- loads tighter. Happy about this. lol

Bladder- both good & bad.
The good- I seem to be able to empty my bladder. I think but not sure.
The bad- experiencing what I'm pretty sure is nerve damage. My bladder nerves fail to give a proper signal to my brain telling me I am busting. They sort of tell me, but the busting feeling isn't that strong so I am using a timer to go loo every 2 hours. does that make sense? When the nerves are cut with a knife obviously they are damaged aye. Has anyone else experienced this after surgery or am I a rare case? At least i won't feel busting when I start having sex again because it interupts it.

Sorry I didn't say thank you for the advice Nikrap and Hilda. Today I have done less.

meisha82, shame this has happened to you so young......mine did not start to manifest itself until my mid 50s.
Am no expert but natural childbirth is not necessarily a precursor to prolapse ....its just some of us are unlucky and if a certain set of circumstances happen...in my case Ist child was large, late and medically deeply unpleasant coupled with an early menopause and not looking after my 'core' enough had lead to this prolapse. Luckily I'm ok with the ring and do not want to go down the surgery route until absolutely necessary.

I think all young women need to be made aware of there 'apparatus' early, how to do pelvic exercises and to keep up their core strength through swimming, dance, yoga, pilates etc etc. Its so important!

Keep up the good work with your slow gentle recovery....you OH will reap the benefit later ....nudge nudge wink wink!

Meisha 82 glad you are taking it easier,I dont Know if you have read my posts further down but I dont feel I have much choice as this lump stops me from having a life . It really hurts to walk and even travelling in the car can be dreadful . So this feels like my last chance for a better outcome apparantly the vault is now coming down and because the tissue is to weak to hold anything up after 2 previous ops Ineed to have mesh to support it all.My problem has been the dreadful feeling of this lump all the time Ifeel im almost giving birth every day and cant live with it any longer .As I said Iseem to be fine for 8-10 weeks after each op but then it all comes down again.I am really dreading having this mesh inside me as there seens to be alot of people desperate to have it taken back out. The surgeon Ihave found down in luton is confident it will give me a better quality of life and has not had any problems that he couldnt sort out. So what do we do? I have to trust in some one, my op is on the 28th aug really trying to remain positve . take carexxx

I'm sorry to hear what has happened. I've done a little more research trying to get to the root of this problem. I may not be on the right track but I think it makes sense...

Has your doctor or gyno tested your estrogen levels???

I think I will go and test mine so if it is too low I will increase it by taking natural foods containing estrogen, estrogen cream or supplements (not synthetic ones) to help prevent this coming back again.

If your body is low in estrogen usually if you are breastfeeding, on certain types of medication or going through menopause the lining in all your pelvic floor area becomes weaker and can more easily become damaged. (you may already know this).

Low in estrogen = loss of collagen in pelvic floor.

Don't worry if you are low you can add to your diet or use the vaginal cream
to start strengthening again. If the prolapse is severe I would still do surgery 1st and then estrogen treatment to prevent it coming back.

Heres something interesting...birth control pills contain harmful synthetic estrogen that trick the female body into thinking it doesn't need to produce natural estrogen anymore. birth control pills = low estrogen that weakens the vagina & other lining in organs in that area. I was on birth control pills for 11 YEARS before I had kids then breastfeed for 3 years lowering my estrogen levels even more. I had no idea it was probably contributing to a future prolapse. Other medications have also proven to thin, dry & weaken the vagina wall as well as reducing our saliva in our mouths which then causes gum disease and many other health problems we wonder why we have later in our lives. (shock)

Even though I'm sure prolapse has always existed I am wondering if it is more common since the popping pills industry began. I have a friend my age who took birth control pills for years, had kids and now she also needs prolapse surgery.

Foods that contain natural estrogen -
www.wikihow.com/Increase-Estrogen

Hilda you are right this needs to be explained to all women when they are young.

We are all told we need to do kegel exercises but not told why (do they even work?). Why arn't mothers having talks to their own daughters about all of this?

Nikrap I'm very sorry to hear what has happened. Do you have any family and friends who are supportive? I read your other posts. You may like to read my last post about estrogen strengthening the V wall naturally. You could try estrogen before and after surgery. I have read that there are different types of mesh. Have you done any research to find out which are the best ones?? xxx

Incase you are interested here is some information on different types of mesh..

Surgical mesh is a medical device that is used to provide additional support when repairing weakened or damaged tissue. The majority of surgical mesh devices currently available for use are made from man-made (synthetic) materials or animal tissue.

Surgical mesh made of synthetic materials can be found in knitted mesh or non-knitted sheet forms. The synthetic materials used can be either absorbable, non-absorbable, or a combination of absorbable and non-absorbable materials.

Animal-derived mesh are made of animal tissue, such as intestine or skin, that have been processed and disinfected to be suitable for use as an implanted device. These animal-derived mesh are absorbable. The majority of tissue used to produce these mesh implants are from a pig (porcine) or cow (bovine).

Non-absorbable mesh will remain in the body indefinitely and is considered a permanent implant. It is used to provide permanent reinforcement in strength to the urogynecologic repair. Absorbable mesh will degrade and lose strength over time. It is not intended to provide long-term reinforcement to the repair site. As the material degrades, new tissue growth is intended to provide strength to the repair.

meisha my experience was similar but different. I was nearly 38 when DS was born. About 8 years later had vaginal prolapse and hysterectomy was advised. Gyno said I could opt for repair but he'd almost guarantee I'd have more problems. At that age I wasn't concerned about the hysterectomy, went through it and subsequently sailed through menopause. My main point however is about rest post-op.
I did exactly as I was told and rested! I recovered well and have had no problems since. A friend had the same op a few weeks later and poo-poo'd the whole idea of rest and recovery. She didn't listen to advice and 20 years later still has problems. I admit that I felt I should be up and about and that I'd gone to work with a cold or sore throat, feeling far worse. At times I felt like a fraud. Both daughters were working so I employed my student niece to change beds, hoover and deal with laundry.
Any way you can get some more help? Please don't let yourself and your family down by not taking this seriously.

Hi meisha Yes I do know its important to increase oestrogen intake Ive been on vagifem pessaries 2x a week for awhile now as ive been going through the menopause since the age of 47 Im now 62 and still get hot flushes which are worse in the night . Ive got to increase them to 4x a week at the moment to prepare for op, Iwas only told that the mesh used was gold standard which at the moment is supposed to be the best available.Thanks for all your info do keep resting. Best wishes xxx

Sorry to have been missing for so long niknap I have pm'd you re mesh procedure and I'm sure you will be fine.
meisha take things slowly and leave the housework that doesn't need doing until a later date a bit of dust and cleaning will not affect you or your family and don't try to lift even a hoover until at least 6/8 weeks and be prepared for sudden bouts of tiredness.
I have just had more botox to the bladder my second this year but I had the dose increased so maybe I will be lucky and have maybe 12 months relief this time.

glamanana thanks for info regarding mesh procedure hope you got my prv msg best wishes xxx

Thank you for your advice everyone. Yes thats how I feel like a fraud because most of the time I feel I'm well and strong enough to run after the kids, housework and cooking but I'm holding back most of the time reminding myself I only have one chance to heal properly.

Hubi and grandparents have just taken the girls to the pools for a few hours and house is left looking like a bombsite I'm very tempted to tidy even just a little. Is a little ok do you think or do none at all? My hubi keeps saying to me I should help out and do the most I feel I'm able to do because my body will tell me if I'm doing too much & last Tuesday my mother in law got mad with me and told me I should be doing more. She has had lots of surgery for different things and never rests after so I guess she thinks anyone that does rest too long after surgery is just being lazy.

I only have my husband to help around the house but I hate having to keep asking him what to do. Sometimes he does it without asking but other days breakfast dishes, animals not feed and beds still arn't made in the evening unless I end up doing it (don't want to run out of clean dishes). My mother in law sometimes looks after our 4yr old at her place for a bit which I appreciate. I might just have to get used to having a very messy home for 6 weeks.

Nikrap- It seems like the gyno is doing their best to help you. do you have family support? Because I think thats important. X

meisha 82 I do sympathise but I cannot believe your husband can be that selfish or your mother in law! Perhaps your consultant could have a few words with him regarding your recuperation. You need to rest. You should not pick up anything heavier than a kettle for at least 6 weeks going on to 12 weeks. If you do not then you will have to have another operation to repair the damage.
Tell your husband that if you do then perhaps you will not be able to have sex properly again and perhaps that will make him a bit more understanding. I realise that this is difficult with young children as I have my 2 grandchildren age 2 and 4 who are often with me. I do not pick them up as I don't want to damage myself. You need to take care of yourself and put yourself first or you will do irreparable damage. That will not help you or your husband.
Sorry I am not angry with you just the selfish people around you.

hello all hope everyone ok how are you Meisha still taking things easy Ihope Im just waiting for the days to pass just want to be done and on the road to recovery Best Wishes to all xxx

All the best to you nikrap, I know how important it is to feel half way ok 'down below'. XX

Thanks Hilda for your good wishes xx

Glammanana was your surgery similar to mine Just got a letter to say that the surgeon will fix the mesh to the 5th vertebrae of my spine to hold everything up .It petrifies me if Im honest Keep thinking am I going to end up with even more problems.Do hope that Im doing the right thing,dont feel ive got a choice really,so long since I felt normal down below.

Meisha you have been quiet, still looking after yourself and not doing too much.

Best wishes to all xxx

Hello everyone just popping in to see if anyone has done any posts.
Its my op day tomorrow 28th for Laparoscopic sacrolopopexy after 2 failed prolapse surgerys for cystocele rectocele and entrocele prolapses.Really worried as to the out come of this surgery has Ive had such alot of problems and Im hoping that Im going to be good after this and able to get about and be able to walk.Hi meisha hope you doing ok love and best wishes xx

Good luck with the op nikrap I hope you make a good recovery.

Wishing you all the best for a successful operation. I do hope things will be much better for you. Do look after yourself afterwards. No lifting for ages - try a travel kettle if you are on your own and desperate for a cuppa. I recall wearing sloggy big pants a few weeks after my op when I went for a walk as I felt they gave me a bit of support!
for you

Thanks Nanabelle and Rubysong

At home now after long journey yest, feeling not to bad a bit rough around the edges.Was faced with a bit of dilema upon arrival has surgeon asked if he couldnt do it laporoscopic because he didnt know how much previous scar tissue he would find would it be ok to procede vaginally.I wasnt prepared for this and felt the only answer at that moment was to say I would leave it up to him (Surely should have been asked this previous to half an hour before op)But anyway he managed to do it Laporoscopic although complex and took 3hrs. Tum like a huge football with four points of entry been very sickly but that has improved today after lots of meds in hospital and injections only come home with lactolose and told to use whatever I normaly use at home so only had 1 paracetamol and 1 ibruprofen in case its meds that make me sick but I think ibruprofen is supposed to help with swelling not sure.Think they ought to give more info especially as Ive had to keep paying for these op meds obviously extra. Sorry for the ramble taking it one day at a time Still worrying about this mesh inside me, love to all xxxx

nikrap, I send my best to you, you sound a real trooper, fingers and everything else crossed for your recovery.