Depression 2

Sujected? Silly iPad! Suggested!

Mishap I know that we are both on the same drug, (perhaps different doses) and as you know I take mine at 6pm (the bongs go on the radio and I'm heading to the cupboard like one of Pavlov's dogs!)

I wonder if we have the same side effects? The main ones for me are a very dry mouth and feeling all jittery and jangly in the morning, hard to describe, but hopefully you will know what I mean.

Yes - dry mouth definitely.

I too get akathisia ("movement disorder characterized by a feeling of inner restlessness and a compelling need to be in constant motion") which is your "jittery and jangly" problem. Mine occurs during the night, which is why I take the drug at 8 pm so that it does not occur during the day and hopefully I am asleep when it happens.

I would guess that you are on a bigger dose than me - I only take 1 and a half 25 mg capsules - I am very sensitive to drugs and they are wary of giving me too much because of the heart arrhythmia that I get. There are treatments for the akathisia, but they too carry their own side effects of course!

Interestingly I feel dozy rather than jittery in the mornings - as if I have been dredged up from the bottom of the river.

If you are taking it at 6 pm, it is surprising that you still get the problem in the morning, which is a long time afterwards. For me taking it at 8 pm results in the problem occurring during the night, rather quicker than for you.

I hope that you can get your way through the morning fidgets somehow. The long term and more general benefit is worth having.

It possibly was me Nfk - I must take my own advice!

Scored 31 yesterday; but not great this morning. Things improve as the day goes on so I am hanging on to that.

Sunny here, but too icy to venture out yet.

Is it worth doing separate morning and afternoon scores?

On a bit of a down spiral atm. The pain in my hamstring plus the painful clunking in my knee is getting me down. Starting to think DW would be better off without me, she can't do the things we normally do. I would even consider having the leg removed if I thought they would do it. My neighbor had his leg off and it improved his life no end, he was walking again within a few months. He had a huge battle to get the surgeon to remove it.

pompa I'm sure Mrs pompa would disagree! Are you seeing you GP regularly at present?

Mishap For ages I was on 2x25mg capsules a day, taken in the evening. Two different GP's told me that that is considered a very minimal dose, sort of "neither here nor there* in terms of effect. (I think it's around a fifth of the maximum dose, not entirely sure) but I'm currently on 1x75mg tablet a day.

Seen Dr. re hamstring pain, not much can be done, just anti inflammatories, ice and rest. I see the consultant in 6 weeks, I will talk to him about the clunking then, mentioned it to my Dr, he thought it was normal, but I don't think it should be so painful.

pompa You are, as you say, in a downward spiral just now, never the best time to make decisions which are a result of you feeling so low. This is not how you think normally.

Please see your GP and tell him exactly how you are feeling. I am sure no one needs to tell you how devastated Mrs P would be without you.

Perhaps your GP could expedite your appointment with the consultant, but I doubt if he'll agree to the drastic measure of removing your leg. There must be another solution.

I agree, you must talk to your GP about how you're feeling, not just the physical aspects.

Pompa - I am sorry that you are having a down patch. I know how you feel and you have to keep the faith and believe that there will be better days to come.

I can also identify with the feeling that family might be better off without me - but they do not agree, and I am sure that Mrs P feels the same. Think about if it was the other way round and she was unwell and you needed to support her. You would do it without a second thought.

I can also understand your frustration with your pain and "clunking" - I am deeply fed up (understatement alert!) about my hip surgery - I am in no less pain now 4 months down the line - just in different places - than I was before the surgery and it has cost me dear, having triggered both a heart problem and a depression, and closed down my life as I knew it. I have pain in my groin and shooting down my shin. I fervently wish I had not done it - it was a huge mistake, but I was not to know that. Mind you the surgeon said that the joint was down to bone on bone, so I could not have continued as I was. The surgeon says that everything now looks OK on the x-ray - I wish it really was OK to live with!

I am keeping a daily record of how things are and there is no doubt that the depression has a mind of its own as things are up and down all the time - and the mornings are undoubtedly the worst time for me.

I do hope that you can get an appointment with your GP and discuss all the aspects of your problems - hang on to that leg! - I am sure that there will be ways of easing things a bit. Are you taking pain killers still? - I am.

Phoenix - yes my dose of dosulepin is very small, but I do seem to be very sensitive indeed to drugs and GP and CPN feel I ought to stick to one and a half for now - particularly with the heart problem to take into consideration. I am glad that you are doing well on your 75 mg and hope that the job-hunting is progressing.

Pompa so sorry to find you are feeling down. Try to stay positive and believe things will get better. Perhaps another appointment with your GP and tell them how you feel and there again there's always us here to lend a sympathetic ear.

I have just driven up to the village school and attended a school staff meeting as governor representative. The driving was uncomfortable with groin pain and pain down my leg, but I did it - and felt as if I was some use at the meeting, which has to be good! I am really very tired now - pathetic, but there we are - I have achieved something today - hooray!

Pompa - how's it going. Any news from doc?

Well done Mishap, another step forward to remember if you're having a 'down' day. I'm not surprised you're very tired, hope you have a quiet evening x

Go Mishap !!!!!

Bongs have just gone, off to the cupboard for me!

Well done mishap - go girl!! to celebrate

Big (((hugs))) pompa! to cheer you up!

First proper outing yesterday evening - a friend took me to a concert and I coped and thoroughly enjoyed it. It made me feel as though I had returned to the real world for a bit. I have to hope it will last and I will be able to progress from here.

This morning 2 friends came round to sing with me; and my DD and boys have been here after school bearing a yummy chicken stew for us all.

I am nervous of hoping for too much from all this, as I have been knocked back before, but even a few moments of normality is to be treasured. Fingers crossed.

Mishap If you feel particularly bad in the morning and get better during the day have you thought about a SAD light?

Mishap you are a real trooper, well done!
I'm really pleased for you; six weeks or so since your OP, fingers crossed steady progress continues x

I read through all of your thread last night, Mishap, and what an awful time you've been having. I do so hope that things are on the up for you now. Very gradual, but steady progress, hopefully.

Very pleased for you Mishap Make the most of the good days and if you have a bad one, remember them and tell yourself they will return. You are doing so well.

Pompa Hope you are feeling better too.

Good news Mishap. Keep going in the right direction

Thank you for your posts.

I have had a few good days and feel deep down that something has changed as I do not feel so nervous of just breaking down out of the blue. There is a little sparkle that has returned - it is difficult to describe what I mean, but it is welcome and I so hope it will last.

It is just as well really as I am in lots of pain - so much so that I did not get to sleep until 3 this morning. Nothing to do with depression, but simply because I have so much pain, both from my hip surgery which is causing nerve pain shooting down my leg to my toes, and also from my other hip, which I knew was a bit knackered, but is now making its presence felt as the physio has gingered it up. If I had still been feeling very depressed I think I might have despaired.

The surgeon says he cannot understand the source of my pain as the x-rays are fine - but I can tell him the source of the pain - it is my femoral nerve which has presumably been stretched/ bruised or whatever by the surgery. What I need to know is how to get rid of it! I am seeing the physio on Weds and will give her the third degree as to what I might be able to do about it.

As I am sitting here with the laptop, my shin feels as if someone is chucking boiling water down it.