Depression 2

Not in the slightest surprised you've been struggling! The fall alone would have been enough to trigger post-traumatic stress, let alone subsequent events. Flashbacks are common following an accident (I had them for months after my fall and fractures), both day and night, but they do become less vivid in time and now I can 'observe' them rather than relive them on the rare occasion they happen.
You are doing really well Mishap, be kind to yourself and hugs x

Thank you all for your kindness - it is greatly appreciated.

This morning I have been looking at this site and thought it was interesting and might be of interest or help to others: www.clinical-depression.co.uk/. Their basic premise is that anti-depressants have a role but they ony treat the symptoms and do not address the causes and thus create the risk of relapse. There is also a very interesting section on the relationship between dreaming and depression which is a new idea to me.

I have come to the conclusion that some of my problems do have a flavour of post traumatic stress: the fall that broke my foot (on the edge of a fast-flowing river and I was in danger of being washed away; last thing I heard as I passed out was OH saying I had no pulse); hip surgery - which I found very traumatic as getting adequate pain relief was a problem for me and I admit to being overly anxious about it all; episode of very fast atrial fibrillation and being whisked off to A&E and shot through to resus at great speed. I relive the fall in my dreams and sometimes it flashes into my mind during the daytime. I know it seems illogical - but it is what it is.

The counsellor I saw was trying to look at this, but her approach was problematical for me, so I am looking at other sources of help.

One of the difficulties is that depression is poorly understood and there ae so many ideas as to how to treat it - it is enough to make you depressed!

I think you are doing great too. You probably can't see it though. I have memories of feeling as if I was fighting through a thick fog of jelly all the time. Very slow. Just add up all your current ailments and it's now wonder at all that you feel as you do, it would be more surprising if you were cheerful.

Mishap - you shouldn't feel ashamed. This can happen to anyone. I too have been in the situation where I can hardly hold a conversation with people. I have been unable to get the words out, my voice has been quivering and shaky and I have felt like screaming. I'm not looking for sympathy but I have had a pretty horrendous life so I am going to give myself a break and tell myself that people can take so much before something has to give. Your posts on GN are always very wise and helpful. You are obviously a lovely person. Be kind to yourself you are doing great

Just popped on to give you a (((hug))) if you need one Mishap. Your spirit is fantastic.

According to a few surveys, nuts that are specifically beneficial to IBS sufferers are, Pistachio, Almonds and Walnuts.

Rant away. We can't only come on here when we are all jolly, it would be unnatural. We need each other and that is the beauty of GN, to help each other through all the times, good and bad.

I have had bad spells of depression too. I think once you have suffered with it, it stays with you and rears it's head from time to time, just when you least expect it. It is like a dark tunnel, from which there feels no escape. Mine has all been family based, but I have had counselling and felt better after it and have somewhat coped better since, even though things have upset me and continue to upset me still. I reason things out for what I want out of my life, not what is best for anyone else anymore. I have done my best for everyone in the family and when I and my son were going through a particular bad time, we only had each other to get better. No-one else wanted to know. So now I look after him and myself, everyone else can go spin.

I don't know your full history, but I found that doing really small things like painting your nails, soaking your feet, having a foot rub, someone brushing your hair, massaging your hands with lovely hand cream, all can make just a little difference and slowly lift the spirits again. Do you like reading? I read Chicken Soup for the Soul books and they make me feel good. Have a look on Amazon, you can get one for £2.81.

I do hope you feel better or at least a bit better soon. It is awful and I know what you mean by your DH dealing with it. My DS says the same when I try to explain yet again how I feel, but he still listens and makes me feel better by his young wise words. I'll be watching for your progress.

This illness is a real b****r - I have had a few good days but have been floored by it tonight. Jittery and weepy - it just drops on you out of the blue. I find it quite scary as it feels as though one's very personality is being leeched away. And the ups cannot be relied upon as there is no way of knowing when you might sink again or how far.

I could hardly hold a conversation on the phone with my DD thus evening - I just about held it together till the call ended. What kind of illness is it that you cannot even hold a conversation with your much-loved daughter?!

Part of me feels ashamed for all the depressed patients I was involved with in my career - I am sure I did my best, but I now know that I did not have the faintest clue what they were going through.

OH says recovery does not go in a straight line and I have to keep hoping that tomorrow will be a better day. He is a rock.

I have had so much imodium today that surely I must at least have some gastro-intestinal peace tomorrow.

End of rant Chapter 2.

More mishap I too have had a very dodgy tummy for most of my life. It's got worse as i'v got older. If I eat a healthy diet lots of fruit and veg, nuts seeds it makes me much worse. Bread often makes it worse. When one of my children was getting married I went on the L.A diet and the whole thing cleared up in two days. No farting wind, no rushing to the loo. The problem was,it was high protein so I'm not sure it was healthy. No fruit, no bread. So I know mines related to food. I also think that when your feeling really low something that you would normally cope with seem to be unbearable. I do hope you feel a little better soon. Chin up and hold tight.

It may well only apply to me Tegan. I haven't done a survey.

I didn't know nuts had that effect. I wish I could turn back the clock, though and not suffer with the tummy trouble that plagued me for most of my adult life, being too embarrassed to see a doctor [even though I worked for one] for years until I started getting stomach pain .

I should have clarified that a small amount of nuts may be effective without causing blocking.

The one I've seen advertised is only £30 [reduced by £50] but, although itclaims to do the things a Nutribullet does I can't vouch for it. There has been a knock on effect in that, buying so much fresh food and only having a small fridge I've had to read up on food storage etc so my fridge is still overcrowded but very tidy. When I've used up the green tea I'll start on the boxes of herbal tea I've bought over the years as well. Not sure if they're much good if they're well past their use by date, but I hate wastage. Another thing I do with my nutribullet is to put any tablets in that I take as I gag on tablets and find them dificult to swallow. Not sure how safe that is if it's medical stuff though, but mine is just me feeding my hypochondria . It says on the box that it increases energy, improves sleep, improves digestion, improves fitness recovery,improves hair, skin and nail health [my nails are a lot better but, alas my hair is beyond help] and reduces stress. May be a placebo effect but, at least it isn't something that can do any harm. Perhaps it's the hemp seed that I add sometimes that is making me feel so good, though .

I have a juicer which does citrus and other fruits and veg. When I noticed Tegan's mention of nuts, I thought, a NutriBullit would be wasted on me as I have to be careful how many nuts I eat so, my own juicer is fine.

This got me thinking Mishap. I can only eat a very small amount of nuts as if I have too many, I would be, as you described, blocked to the eyeballs so I wondered if the effect I experience would apply to you. I may be talking jibberish here, if so, ignore.

Another plus as far as the NutriBullet is concerned is that it is really, really easy to clean! No fiddly bits, no scraping of gungy bits, just a quick wash and rinse and it's done.

Thanks Tegan - I will look into it.

NflkD - your poor OPH if imodium does not work - it is my lifesaver - although it seems to create a rebound diarrhoea as it wears off.

What fun life is.

You can put nuts and seeds into it and it breaks it down completely. Unlike a juicer it leaves no pulp so nothing is wasted.This morning I put far too much into it and used apple, beetroot,celery,banana,carrot, walnuts,bio yoghurt, honey and a couple of dates. I'm always buying green tea and not drinking it so I now make it with green tea instead of water. I usually put spinach in but didn't have any. Because there is a mixture of vegetable and fruit it doesn't raise you blood sugar levels quickly [or so they say]. I'm sure that with IBS your body doesn't absorb vital nutriments sometimes but this is so easy to digest you get all of the goodness in an easy to digest way. I saw it advertised on a shopping channel and waited ages before I bought one. The trouble with full on IBS you never know what will make it worse do you?

Questran is one of DHs options - but only taken for a couple of days at a time. Imodium doesn't seem to have much effect!

Many thanks to all for your kindness. You are my ports in this storm.

Tegan - how does this thing differ from an ordinary blender?

Wow, Mishap, you have more than enough on your plate to deal with. No one would blame or censure you for ranting - rant away! It makes me feel very ashamed to be so feeble after a few days' gastroenteritis. It must be infuriating not to be taken seriously by the medics - damn them! How is it possible for people to suffer like this without adequate support or help? (That's a rhetorical question, btw).
As I've grown older my bowels and digestive system seem to react unpredictably to certain situations or foods. I too never go anywhere without Immodium and also spare knickers in the car boot, just in case! I don't know whether this is related to IBS and I don't know much about the condition, but I'm guessing that is very mild compared to what Mishap and others are living with daily.

Surely, surely there is research being done on this, somewhere?

Don't apologise for rant Mishap!
I have had IBS for years, luckily fairy mild most of the time (fingers crossed), but flares up when ever stressed and usually at the very least convenient time, so do have some idea of how you feel.
Take care and (((hugs))) to you x

I know I'm still in evangelical mode about it but I've started having a 'nutriblast' again each day. It's a way of getting lots of nutrition into your body with as little strain on the digestive system as possible. I then just eat a very light meal later in the day knowing that I've had my 5 day + already. I don't think I've had full blown IBS but I've certainly had tummy trouble for most of my life [and can't go anywhere without imodium].Mine is a Nutribullet but there's a cheaper version on the market called Cooks Professional multiblender. Can't promise that it wouldn't make IBS worse but it has certainly worked for me. They say it can help recovery time for certain illnesses and a friend of my daughters who is a nurse says that a lot of her patients use them.

Mishap......you have my full understanding and support. Remember this, nothing stays the same for ever, there WILL be change for you and it will be positive given all the love and support you have. Be kind to yourself, do the things you like, plug yourself into the iPod with glorious music to fill your mind. Be gentle with yourself, you are a obviously a very special person to many.

Take care

IBS is a very prevalent and very debilitating illness. At its worst I weighed about 7 and a half stone - not much as I am quite tall. The medical profession dismiss it because it is not cancerous - once they have ruled that out, you are more or less on your own and left to struggle.

The only help that ever came my way was a complicated test that showed that I did not absorb bile salts normally and I was put on Questran which worked so well I blocked to the eyeballs so I was taken off it to prevent me getting obstructed. It was either one thing or t'other!

I am sorry that your OH suffers in this way, but glad to hear that there is a cocktail that suits his needs.

DH has a sort of ulcerated colitis with IBS overtones so I have an idea of what you're going through. He's even considered having a colostomy. Luckily he's now found a concoction of various medications which more or less control it. Most of the time.

What infuriates me is people who have poor eating habits (eating at speed on the move sort of thing) who claim IBS when it's really just indigestion.