My dad's in hospital, cancer now spread to lungs and spine, he has fractures on his spine, broken collerbone from a fall and urine and chest infection. I hadn't seen him since he wanted me to back off a bit but he has got in a state since even though he was being looked after by carers. He looks skin and bone, probably not even 6 stone now, he was a nice size all his life but his legs are like pins. It has been a shock because it has happened all at once.
I have had to try to get him a place in a nursing home for end of life care although it doesn't seem like he will be here long now although he is still eating small amounts of like custard and rice pudding. I have provisionally managed to get him a place, it's up to the ward staff now to sort out his discharge and finances.
I had gone to bed but it all keeps going round in my head and I started to get upset so I got back up.
My mum was on the same ward too last week. She was determined to go and see my dad (they divorced 14 years ago), even though he had vomiting and diarrhoea and was being barrier nursed, she still got to see him. Then when she was leaving for home, she kissed him and said goodbye. Very sad but someone lovely. They were married for over 40 years.
Some might know that he has dementia too, so one thing is that the dementia hasn't got that bad that he didn't recognise me or be too forgetful, if you know what I mean. Both terrible diseases. Poor guy couldn't win.
What are nursing homes like? Are they good on end of life care? Saying that, I used to work in one and that one was nice.
A lot of tears, work, mixed emotions, wondering what to do for the best telling people etc., organizing a funeral. Is it ok to inject a little humour into a funeral or should I keep it straight laced? He was always up for a laugh but I wouldn't like to be seen as disrespectful although he would get it.
Gosh, it sucks. No matter what age you are, you still want your parents to be shouting you in for tea and giving you a clip round the ear for being late. X
