Whats wrong with me?

Gilly, How was your day, yesterday??

Hope today goes ok and you get some answers soon ?

I hope today went well, that you feel comfortable with the process, and results prove a path going forward to good health.

All the best, gillybob. Reading through the posts, there's been some good advice and I can't really offer anything different. Take care.

gillybob I hope all goes well for you today. You need and deserve something really good to happen. To chase the dark clouds away. I hope that thing is just around the corner.

Thinking of you. Nothing new I can say.

Gilly, thinking of you today. I know you will not receive any information today but hope that you feel that you are on your way to getting answers {{{hugs}}}

Good luck. Please take care and consider looking at the situation with a fresh mind - maybe there is a way out - it is so easy to find oneself in a hole and not be able to think of a way out.

We have taken some radical and risky decisions in our life together, but always because we put health and well-being at the top of the agenda - we always muddled through in the end.

I've only just seen this thread. Don't dread the scan it could well lead to a resolution not a problem. Then treat yourself to a pile of chips in the hospital canteen.

Gillybob, best of luck for today, my thoughts are with you.
{{{hugs}}}

gillybob good luck today, thinking of you and hoping for a good outcome which will allay your worst fears.
Wish I could offer more positive help, but you know we are all behind you.

hope all goes well today x

Thinking of you today gilly

gillybob, just reading your posts I can feel how much stress, anxiety and dare I say it, depression your words convey yo me. Time to put yourself first girl, and have a chat with your GP and tell him or her how you FEEL and not just how you are. I would also tell them about your thoughts about being dead, that's a very telling statement. . Sometimes we spend so much of our energy looking after everyone else that we forget ourselves. I do so hope you get the answers you need from the docs and that nothing serious shows up in your scan. I'm also wondering if you hate your job because of the way you feel or is it the way you feel now that's making you hate your job?

When you mentioned constant headache it reminded me of when I had Giant Cell Artritis (not arthritis) also known as Temporal Artrits. I developed a headache which would not shift and no pain relief would help. My scalp was also very tender to lie on but no actual lump.

Eventually after a week I went to the emergency doctor with my 'migraine'.

He said it was not migraine and decided it was likely Giant Cell Artritis and should go to my GP first thing next morning. Prednisone soon sorted it.

And sometimes headaches can indeed by caused by what we take for the headache, it's often withdrawal from the medication that gives us a headache.

Please do go to your doctor.
Doctor can check for overall body inflammation with a blood test. He/She will want to know how you are and try to help you.

I'm sorry you are feeling frightened about tomorrow's scan, It's natural to be concerned.

Been trying to think of something succinct and meaningful to write since you posted this, gillybob.
But I couldn't think of anything, so just sending you my very best wishes. Hope you can slowly get back to feeling much better. X

Best wishes for tomorrow gillybob. Try to get some good sleep tonight.

Hope all goes well for you tomorrow

Thank you GrandmaMoira I really appreciate your kind post .

I find these days that all I do is wish Monday was Friday and that Friday was Monday. Effectively wishing my life away .

Dreading tomorrow's scan feeling quite frightened about what they might find .

Gilly - I've just come across this thread and can't offer anything new but do hope all goes well with your scan and you find a way out of this situation.

Miserable as ever Norah .

DH says I'm just like the weather.... miserable, dark and gloomy.

Being accused of mocking spelling mistakes on another thread (something that I never do as I make plenty of them myself) but hey ho, I have much more to worry about. My scan been brought forward to tomorrow afternoon. Seeing specialist on Tuesday.

Gilly, How are you?

I also have stopped taking painkillers because they gave me terrible headaches ,so it was just swapping one pain for another,been waiting 3 months for an MRI scan for what the GP says is a herniated disc and it is painful.The bleeding could be fibroids or endymetriosis as I was diagnosed with both a couple of years ago.I'm on HRT which seems to have stopped the heavy bleeding but I still have breakthrough bleeding every couple of months .I've an appointment to get something that can help me sleep too as I can cope with the pain as long as I'm not tired from tossing and turning.Try not to worry ,most bleeding isn't sinister and can be stopped .Stopping the painkillers is a big decision but might be your best option to sort the headaches

Just want to add my sincere good wishes - you are running on empty, as they say. I have felt like you do in previous episodes if my life but never had to contend with as much as you have to. Smoke good helpful advice in here but only you know what is feasible.
I live in the north east myself and I know how beautiful and healing the coastal walks are. Try and keep them up if you can manage.
You need and deserve an easier life, hope eventually this will come. Xx

Luckygirl
What a very good post. You've summed it up completely.
gillybob
Remember: don't rescue to the extent where you have to be rescued.